Broadening Your Genre Horizons

Not excited about going to the movies this weekend? Sick of the expense, the crowds, the guy who won’t stop talking and those people in the back who have the unbelievable hubris to bring their six-month old infant?

The Wave-inatrix suggests: Home Box Office 101

Now, I know this ordinarily means watching your favorite dvd’s yet again. But how about this weekend, Rouge Wavers head to their favorite video store and choose a selection of movies that they haven’t seen? Gasp! And I’ll up the ante once again: how about Rouge Wavers see some movies they don’t think they’ll like? This weekend, Rouge Wavers, we collectively face our fears. Yes, the Wave-inatrix is throwing down the gauntlet.

It’s the Most Hated Genre Weekend Workshop . Fasten your seatbelts; it’s gonna be a bumpy night.

Here is a short list of movies that represent a spectrum of genres to choose from. Choose a few you think you’ll hate:

Westerns and why you might have avoided them: Westerns are campy. They are boring; the landscapes are flat and dull and I don’t get why John Wayne is such an icon and sagebrush is not that interesting and….The Wave-inatrix begs to differ:

High Noon
The Magnificent Seven
The Alamo
Unforgiven
High Plains Drifter
Shane
Stagecoach
Red River

Broad Comedy: They’re dumb, i.e., I am too intellectual for this stuff. They are meaningless. I am above them. It would be a chink in my intellectual armor if I laughed at the nude wrestling scene in Borat because then all my friends know I’m just a regular person too! Note from the Wave-inatrix: get over yourself and be prepared to laugh your hiney off:

Borat
Top Secret
Anchorman
Police Academy
Airplane
Caddyshack
The Waterboy
Vacation
Stripes

Documentaries: B-o-r-i-n-g. I saw enough of that stuff in school. Who cares. Documentaries are not artful, they are just an information delivery system. Oh, Rouge Wavers, watch and be amazed:

The Fog of War
The Thin Blue Line
We Regret to Inform You
The Wonderful, Horrible Life of Leni Riefenstahl
Roger and Me
Grey Gardens
Born Into Brothels
When We Were Kings
The Times of Harvey Milk

Black and White Movies: I don’t like black and white. It’s hard to look at. I can’t get into it. It’s too slow. They’re old, outdated and irrelevant. They are for snobs, film students and pretenders. But I secretly feel inadequate and under-educated because I haven’t seen very many which is why I say all this stuff to myself defensively. I actually live in shame. Rouge Wavers, bow your heads, you are forgiven:

Harvey
Love in the Afternoon
Mildred Pierce
It Could Happen to You
Casablanca
Gilda
All About Eve
The Apartment
On the Waterfront
Double Indemnity
Psycho
Adam’s Rib
Sunset Boulevard
Some Like it Hot
Rebecca
The Gold Rush
Sullivan’s Travels
Mr. Smith Goes to Washington

Cult films: They are obtuse and I'm afraid I won't get it. They are pseudo-intellectual, weird, trendy, non-traditional or campy: Rouge Wavers – that’s exactly the point. Step outside of your comfort zone:

Donnie Darko
Eraserhead
Blue Velvet
Jesus’ Son
Pink Flamingos
Down by Law
Hush Hush Sweet Charlotte
Night on Earth
Being John Malkovitch
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Trainspotting
Swimming to Cambodia

Drama: They’re boring. I don’t get into it. Not enough action. They’re too touchy-feely and self-important. I have a short-attention span already and when I feel I am supposed to pay attention because it’s “important” I check out. The Wave-inatrix weeps for you:

The Graduate
The Killing Fields
Driving Miss Daisy
Trip to Bountiful
Ordinary People
Little Children

Romcom: Ick. I hate gooey, sticky, silly love stories. Romcom has no artful significance. I am a cynic at heart and down with love and all that. I’m way too smart for this silly genre: Oh Rouge Wavers – thou shalt NOT diss this genre!!

When Harry Met Sally
My Best Friend’s Wedding
Born Yesterday
Roxanne
Sabrina
What’s up, Doc?
Woman of the Year
Bridget Jones’s Diary
It Happened One Night
The Truth About Cats and Dogs
Pillow Talk
Sleepless in Seattle


Scary or Violent Movies: They aren’t artful. They are just full of blood, gore and cheap scares. There’s nothing to this genre. Secretly, I’m just a big fraidy cat and so I diss the whole genre. Wavers – I hear you – trust me, don’t miss movies like these:

The Exorcist
Heat
Taxi Driver
The Ring
The Sixth Sense
Raging Bull
Serpico
Goodfellas
The Gangs of New York
28 Days Later
Rosemary’s Baby
The Gift

Science Fiction: I have not been interested in sci-fi ever since we had to read Ray Bradbury in grade school. I don’t get it, I don’t care, I find dystopian movies depressing. These are strictly for fan boys. Not so fast, people. Check out:

5th Element
1984
Blade Runner
Minority Report
Close Encounters of the Third Kind
Gattica
Logan’s Run
Star Wars
The Handmaids Tale

War Movies: War movies are boring. It’s just all shooting and explosions and no character development – who cares. Too many memories of flickering, black and white rat-a-tat-tat on the TV growing up. Au, contraire, the movies listed below are, without exception, moving, intelligent and complex:

A Bridge Too Far
Bridge over the River Kwai
Patton
Platoon
Hamburger Hill
The Thin Red Line

Woody Allen: He’s a mumbling, fumbling, neurotic New Yorker and I just don’t get it. I’ve heard too much about his personal life; he’s overrated and hasn’t made a good movie in over a decade. Rouge Wavers, I’ll give that last point but know this: I am a huge Woody Allen fan; here’s a sample of what I consider to be his best work:

Hannah and Her Sisters
Manhattan
Annie Hall
The Purple Rose of Cairo
The Front

Action: They are dumb. It’s all about explosions and car chases. There is nothing artful or redemptive here, there is no story. My annoying ex used to drag me to these and I grew to associate them with dumb guys. Yeah, yeah I know, the female Rouge Wavers are nodding vigorously. Girls – give it a shot. Not as dumb as you think – at all. Just go with it. You’ll be pleasantly surprised.

Die Hard
Lethal Weapon
Mission Impossible
Top Gun
Con Air
Crouching Tiger
Face/Off
Spiderman (any)
Batman (any)

The Wave-inatrix will shut down you nitpickers right now by repeating: THESE ARE ONLY SUGGESTIONS – many movies are left off this list; what do you think I am, a walking internet movie data base? In fact, the utter top-of-my-headness of these lists is pretty impressive, if I do say so myself.

Intrepid Rouge Wavers are free to add more lists: musicals, period movies, epic love stories, foreign films, etc – but the point is this: you know what you hate and you know what you’ve avoided.

Nobody is grading this experience but I promise that you will learn invaluable lessons that will absolutely stick – and you might just learn that you are a secret Rodney Dangerfield fan and never even knew it – so long Jean Paul Belmondo sheet and towel set!

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