Life of a Reader: Between the Brads

I am a dreaded reader. Script reader, that is. Don't hate me. I am one of a rare, misunderstood tribe. Readers are usually writers ourselves, we freelance reading scripts because it helps pay the bills while we wait for our big break. And it keeps us "in the business". That is to say, it's better than shredding paper in some office building. It sharpens our own writing skills. Everyday we get paid to analyze scripts and break them down into what is working and what is not working. We read everything from the sublime to the utterly ridiculous. Mostly, it's pretty bad stuff. We accumulate some pretty funny stories. Like the Rouge Wave. It was in a slugline and was supposed to read: A giant rogue wave sweeps over the oil rig. But this writer didn't catch the mistake and instead I was left wondering if it was rouge as in Chanel's Cherry Blossom or perhaps more of a Clinique Sunkissed Peach. I wept for the oil rig workers. To be drowned in a wave of rouge is just too cruel! I really think the writer was going for a more dramatic feeling there. But I appreciated the laugh, I really did.

I read a script for a competition that had a slugline, about midway through that said, simply: This scene not included pending rewrite. In a competition. I read a comedy about a veterinarian that was 530 pages long. When scripts are generally 100-125 tops. It wasn't a story, it was 530 pages of pointless riffing. Oh yeah, and there was a vet in there somewhere.

I read for several pretty big, pretty cool production companies and I consider myself lucky. I also read for an A-list celebrity, looking for material he can star in. The pay is no better but it's fun to say I work for him. I also do script consulting privately and that is something I really love to do. Production company coverage is pretty brutal; we don't get paid to encourage a writer to do better, we get paid to tell an exec, in about a page and a half, how much the script sucks and why. Writers do not realize the pressure readers are under. I have been called on the carpet for being "too nice" to material. If I give a script a "consider" then that exec has to take it home and read it themselves. They really don't appreciate that unless the script actually has merit. There is no such rating for scripts as "Nice try!" or "Cool idea, but can you take a class?" or "You seem really nice!" It's simple: PASS, CONSIDER or the rare blue-footed booby of ratings: RECOMMEND.

Over time, I have accumulated some pretty funny reading stories. The two or three up above are only the tip of the iceberg. If you stay tuned, I'll keep you plenty entertained with more. Just in case, god forbid, I have read your script, be assured I scramble the information a little bit. Sorry rouge wave person.

Once in awhile - once in a GREAT while - I read a script that rocks my world. But that's pretty rare. I thought that perhaps sharing my point of view might be helpful for writers trying to make it over the moat of snapping crocodiles called Readers. We may not be the highest paid people in entertainment, but we are the vanguard. If you can't make it past a reader, you're not in good shape. But don't be discouraged; there are many ways to improve.

Each week, I will post a tip of the week. This week the topic is ACTION LINES.

Action lines are not just paragraphs which describe the building, or the car or the dusty street the character is walking down. They aren't just to tell us the character is wearing "khaki pants, a white shirt and dress shoes". Action lines are like paintings. They should be kinetic, pithy and evocative. What do I mean by that? If a writer is describing a mid-19th century street in Nevada and the day is hot and the bad guy is about to gallop up on his horse, then focus on using that action line to really convey all of that. Let us hear a carriage creaking by. Let us feel the hot sun. Let us choke on the dust and hear the sound of the boots over the wooden walkways. Choose words, in other words, that match the mood of the scene and the tone of the script overall. Read produced scripts and notice the way a horror script will use dark, scary words in the action lines. Notice the way a romantic comedy will use lighter, funnier, bouncier words in the action lines. Make the scene come alive. Don't be afraid to sound like you, not some pedantic machine who's read a how-to screenwriting book one too many times.

Here's a little secret: most readers, and by extension, executives and producers, skim over action lines quickly. Particularly if they are dense. We are only looking for key words so we can orient ourselves. The dialogue is the primary place where the plot is going to play out. Put yourself in our shoes: you are reading anywhere from 5 to 10 scripts a week. You are tired. You have to synopsize this story. And then write at least a page and a half of commentary. You just need to know what happens already. So don't write dense action lines. We won't read them thoroughly anyway, and even if we must or it won't make sense, we will ding you as a writer because the action lines were dry, overly detailed and poorly written. Don't tell us things we cannot see. Action lines are not subtitled. For example, do not say "the viewer will notice immediately how rich with silver money Nevada has grown." Huh? Oh - you mean there's a lot of silver being gambled on the tables? Okay, so just say that. Describe the saloon then. What kind of music is playing? Is the money clinking? Are people shouting when they win and groaning when they lose? Is it a bunch of miners and roughnecks or guys in cravats and monocles? We've all seen movies - describe the scene as if it's a movie. I know that sounds stupid but scripts are not just blueprints of movies, they are facsimiles of movies. We should read them and almost see the scenes recreated in our minds. Another example: a character shouldn't just "note" something. What does that mean? Do they raise their eyebrow? Blush? Look away? Change the subject? Jot it down on a cocktail napkin? Action lines are like paintings. They should move and breathe. They should be brief. We should want to read them because they are part of the pleasure of the script. When in doubt, challenge yourself to cut your action line down by fully half. Review it for words that are adding to the mood and feel you want to evoke. Homework: read even a few sample pages of THE SALTON SEA by Tony Gayton. That is a writer with voice to be reckoned with.

Stay tuned for another Rouge Wave topic of the week!

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