Should I Get a Job in the Industry?

Dear Rouge Wave:

Would you advise an aspiring screenwriter to get a day job as an office manager/administrative assistant for a film production company?

Yes.

Let's say that I didn't need the money, would it be worth it just for the relationship building? And to learn about producing and how prodcos work? (I think I could see myself becoming a writer/producer some day.)

Yes.

If I do apply, should I tell them that I'm an aspiring screenwriter? Is that a conflict of interest? I don't want them to think that I would not be dedicated to my day job.

Yes. But not in a weird, needy, please-do-stuff-for-me way. Just be casual. Be honest. They won't be surprised that you're into screenwriting and/or the business.

Also... If I do tell them about my aspirations, when is the best time? In my cover letter? At the interview? or not until after I've been there a while and gotten to know people? I know I would never ask anyone to read my script until that point.

Yes. Oh sorry, I was on auto-pilot there for a minute. No, these are great questions and I think this is a great opportunity for you. Mention your interests in your interview, of course, just don't make the interview all about you. You are applying to work for them, right? So the interview is mostly about how you'll do a great job in that capacity. That you have an interest in and talent for storytelling and film surely makes you a better employee, as you GET what they do there. Just be very cool about asking for any favors, reads or connections for some time. You have to earn that. Give it several weeks if not a few months of dedicated, loyal, great work ethic before you go there.

So complicated...

Not really. I think this is going to be great for you. Good luck!

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Can Feedback Sabotage Your Story?

Rouge Waver Desiree wrote in and asked:

I've never had a pro to read any of my scripts, but various friends and fellow writers. It has its disadvantages, I know.

Several years ago I listened too much to the advice I got from a friend and one day I woke up and the story was no longer mine, it was his. Since then I have learned to trust my heart.

Would a situation like that ever appear with a pro reader? Would the reader see another potential than intended and give "wrong" advice and change the core of the story?

I have so many thoughts on these questions, Desiree, that it's gonna take me a moment to really get to the heart of it. First of all, this has happened to me, in the distant past. Asking for and receiving story advice that eventuated in my story changing altogether. But years and years and scripts later, I realize that the reason that happened to me is that I didn't know clearly what my story was anyway. So I cast about for opinions and suggestions to plug leaky holes in a weak story, didn't differentiate between the merits of this or that advice, and wound up cobbling it all together into a story that had no relationship to my original idea.

So yes, you will get advice from various people that could radically change your story - but the key is to develop the skill set to differentiate between what can add value to your story and what in fact degrades the central core of what turned you on about it in the first place. Additionally, writers should test changes and suggestions against the key components of the story: main character flaw, theme, the second act adventure (the meat of the premise) and the big battle scene in the end - the pivotal third act resolution. All of those particular components are actually hinged together quite neatly. Like a Rubik's Cube, the way they hinge can change - but they still have to click together and work. So if you change one thing, you affect the whole shape and mechanism of your script.

There is a right way and a wrong way to give feedback. Always be wary of someone who gives you numerous, specific ideas for changes without testing them against those key components. Not everybody is very well equipped to give feedback. But that's your responsibility when asking for it. I see that often on message boards - other screenwriters micromanage and give very specific advice to writers who have posted pages and then the script becomes a weird community project. Don't put yourself in that position.

Getting advice can be great; friends, colleagues or a pro reader might suggest something that opens up a whole new perspective. Just make sure you make it a collaborative experience and that ultimately you stay tethered to the fundamentals of your premise that got you excited in the first place. Test the suggestions against the components of your script, teasing out the outcome to see if it would alter your script in a desirable, surprising or value-added way.

Now: Would a pro reader give you story-changing advice? Maybe. Some. It depends. That goes beyond the scope of what readers get paid to do, generally speaking. At a company like mine, in which readers are paid to evaluate scripts but also to be encouraging and instructive, the readers will give examples and some suggestions, yes. But those readers will only give suggestions that still fit into the framework you came up with. Because when they give suggestions, they know the other key components of your script and they take into account the snowball affect.

I'm sure some pro readers or (not very good) consultants might try to more or less dictate what they would like your story to be - but if you feel those alarm bells going off, it's your responsibility to stop that flow and move on. Teasing great ideas out of a writer is much harder than just saying "look, I would do this." Teaching a writer to think critically and see opportunities instead of having the writer do what YOU think would work is where feedback and mentoring of writers becomes an art form. Anyone can dictate what THEY think YOU should do. But that's not their job. And you do not have to subject yourself to that.

Getting feedback is an interactive, participatory experience. Don't just get in the car blindfolded and be driven somewhere. Look around, ask questions, make your own suggestions and know the path you were originally on in the first place well enough to only deviate from it quite consciously. You are ultimately responsible for your story, where or if you get feedback on it, and what you then do with that feedback.

All of this said, because many Wavers might be members of writing groups or screenwriting message boards in which bad feedback runs rampant, this is probably a good time and place to talk about what good feedback looks like. When giving feedback to a writer, try putting the feedback in the form of a question. Two great ways to start off that question are "what if" and "maybe...?" So you might say, "What if the main character's flaw is actually that he's vain?" and then you and the writer can play with that for a moment. How would changing the flaw affect the theme? How would it affect the main character's arc of change? How would it affect the reversals and complications along the way? So you ask a question and then you follow through with testing how that possible change might affect the major components of the story.

So to summarize, Desiree -

Be careful who you get feedback from; avoid message board blowhards and total strangers who are not familiar with your premise, you or your process.

Check in with the clarity of your understanding of your premise and main character. Are YOU the expert of your own creation? Is your premise pithy, articulate and unique?

Test suggestions against the major components of your script to see if they add value or actually just loosen all the hinges and then require more jury-rigging.

Incorporate only the notes and feedback that resonate for you.

When you give feedback, pose it in the form of a question: "What if" and "maybe" are great starts.

If alarm bells go off because you're hearing multiple opinions and suggestions about your script, step away from the feedback, sleep on all of it and revisit your premise line. Remember, this is YOUR story that only YOU can tell.

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High School Career Day Interview

So this very sweet high school kid from New Jersey or somesuch ["Somesuch??" Hey, we grow great assistants out there! -Ed.] emailed The Script Department with some very thoughtful questions about my company and being a writer. I wrote up the answers to his questions which of course I answered honestly but simply, since this is a teenager and when I was done I thought hmm...while simplified, this is actually not bad.

****

What exactly is the role of your company when it comes to helping screenwriters get their materials to industry professionals?

The Script Department gives aspiring writers a sense of how their script would be received within the entertainment industry. We provide notes and feedback so that writers can address problems in their scripts – whether they be problems of execution or of plot, character or even the premise, so that when the writer then makes those adjustments, they have a professional, polished script to send out to decision-makers in Hollywood. Writers in the process become more adept at the craft of screenwriting. So often aspiring screenwriters have a skewed sense of just how original or accomplished their script really is and send it out to entertainment industry professionals only to get shut down immediately. We are there to help writers make a good first impression – and sometimes to tell them they are not quite ready to make any impression at all but should rather keep learning the art and craft of screenwriting. Writers who wish to be taken seriously and have a career in entertainment writing need to understand that the industry is quite competitive and shoddy work will tarnish their reputation.

What does your job at The Script Department entail?

I am the founder and director of the company so my job is quite detailed and complex but would include marketing and advertising decisions for my company, attending events and teaching classes, managing the readers who work for me, managing all financial decisions for my company and occasionally, working with clients one-on-one to provide story notes and consultations. In the big picture, my job is to keep the whole operation running on a day to day basis. I make sure our clients get what they paid for in a timely and professional manner, and I make sure my readers get paid well and on time for the work that they do. I also interact with other industry professionals making sure that they are aware of not only my company in general, but of a particularly good writer or script that I have so that I can make an introduction on behalf of the writer.

How many screenplays does The Script Department receive on a monthly basis approximately?

It depends on the month. Hollywood has seasons, just like other industries do. Our busiest time is in April and May because there are a lot of screenwriting competitions and writers want to up their chances so they get notes from us first. November, December and January are always a lot slower. In a busy month, we might evaluate about 100 scripts.

Are there any flaws you or The Script Department have seen in new screenplays written by new writers?

There are too many flaws to list here but the two most predominant ones are scripts that are not actually very original story ideas and scripts that are simply not executed well. That is to say, scripts with what we call “soft” structure, or under-developed characters or sometimes even formatting problems. The newer the writer, the more likely we will see these two issues.

Is there anything The Script Department is looking for in a screenplay when it wants to recommend a screenplay to industry professionals?

We are looking for a really great, really entertaining an original story idea and we are also looking for writers with what we call “voice." In the entertainment industry “voice” means a writer with a great deal of individualism on the page. Style, in other words. Hollywood loves writers with voice. The thing is, newer writers often have to learn the rules first before they can really depart and really let their own personalities through on the pages.

From what you or The Script Department have seen, is there anything high-level executives and industry professionals who make screenplays into films want out of new screenplays?

It’s simple. They want to be entertained. They want to not be able to put the script down. And they want to think to themselves that this script is very unique, and it’s cinematic and it will attract great actors and audiences are going to love seeing this film. The entertainment industry is all about dollars, at the end of the day. And movies are very expensive to make. So industry executives want to see potential return for their investment.

What is it like to be an agent who represents screenwriters?

It is a tough way to make a living. Agents are basically salesmen. They have to convince buyers (studios) that what they are selling (the script) is worth several hundred thousand dollars and that further, the script, once made into a movie, is going to earn the studio a great deal of money down the line. Agents make about 10% of the sale of the script. So that means if they sell a script for $200,000, they take home about $20,000. Not too bad but living in Los Angeles is expensive and agents often have to keep up their image with expensive cars and homes. So an agent might need to earn upward of $150,000 a year to support his or her lifestyle. So that’s making seven+ sales per year in order to support that. Agents earn 10% of whatever their client earns, so they can also earn money if their clients gets a rewrite job, not just an outright sale. But the bottom line is that agents have to hustle, every single day, to make a living. That’s why they are so picky when it comes to representing a writer. They can’t afford to hustle and make phone calls and sweet talk buyers if the writer isn’t original and compelling and talented.

What should a new screenwriter be concerned on when s/he is writing a screenplay?

Brand new screenwriters should know that their first script probably won’t turn out that great. They should know that it can take years to really become a gifted screenwriter and that even after that, they may never sell one single script. They should take the art and craft of writing very seriously and study it wherever and whenever they can. New screenwriters should read as many scripts as they can and they should write every day and see a lot of movies. Knowing a lot about movies, particularly the genre you most want to write will put you miles ahead of many other aspiring writers. New screenwriters should have fun and go for it but also be patient and know that this can take quite some time...

Is there anything agents who represent screenwriters want most from a spec script written by a new screenwriter?

A brand new screenwriter can be very attractive to an agent because he or she can say they rep the “hot new writer” in town. They want originality, personality and saleability - of the writer and the script.

Do you believe there is anything notable about a screenplay that is sold to a major film studio versus one that isn’t?

There is a saying in Hollywood that if we knew what made a hit movie, every movie would be a hit. People spend hours analyzing why some scripts get sold to studios and produced and others do not. There doesn’t seem to be any rhyme or reason or pattern that really holds up over time. Studios are drawn to movies that are what they call “four quadrant,” meaning the story should appeal to both younger women and younger men and older women and older men – the widest swath of audience possible. Give you an example: 8 MILE – not a four quadrant movie, right? But UP, the new Pixar release, is. Pixar is great at producing four quadrant movies. So studios do look for wide audience appeal but they are also surprised all the time by movies they didn’t think would appeal to a wide audience but do anyway, like JUNO. A script by an absolute beginner will probably not sell to a studio because the writer probably doesn’t have the skill, creativity and chops of a more experienced writer. But if you put two scripts side-by-side, both written by skilled, talented, experienced writers – probably the one that is both very unique and would appear to appeal to a wide audience will get that sale. “The same but different” is another adage out here in Hollywood, meaning audiences want to watch what they are familiar with – a buddy comedy, a super hero story, a romantic comedy - and yet with different twists, different characters, different settings, etc. DISTURBIA is an interesting example of “the same but different.” Being trapped in a location, unable to escape a menacing threat is not a new story idea. In fact, Albert Hitchcock’s REAR WINDOW pretty much aced this story concept way back in 1954. But DISTURBIA put a new twist on it, and some new details that updated the concept but also put some new touches on it.

How should a writer treat rejection from an agency?

Writers should take rejection totally, 100% in stride. It is part of being a writer. Many very famous writers were rejected hundreds of times before they got published. Stephen King threw his break-out novel, Carrie, into the trash can, he was so frustrated by rejection yet again. Thank goodness he pulled it out of that trash can and submitted it – that novel kick-started a legendary and lucrative career. Rejection is part of life for a writer. You just keep moving on. Sort of like vendors selling balloons or churros or lemonade at an amusement park. You try to sell your writing and when you are rebuffed you just ask the next person if they want to read your story or script too. You have to be persistent, you have to have faith in yourself and you have to want it so bad you can taste it. Opinions are subjective; it only takes ONE person to say “yes” and there you will be – published, sold represented. Only one “yes”. Think about that. But the thing is, that “yes” will be buried under a pile of “nos.” You just can’t hear the word “no.”

I thank you a thousand times over for your willingness to assist me in my research.

You are so very welcome, Dale! I hope my answers have been helpful and good luck with your project!

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The Thirty Thousand Dollar Question

Once in awhile, I come across things that really delight me and make me curious and tingly at the same time. The Robotard8000 was one such recent example. So when I saw an ad on Ebay yesterday for a feature script for sale for $30,000, I just had to know more. I contacted the writer and he was game enough to answer some questions for The Rouge Wave. Make of this what you will, Wavers - is it brilliant guerrilla market, giving Hollywood the eff you finger, or is it futile and misguided? Whatever it is, it is creative and it takes chutzpah. So without further ramblings, let's hear from the writer:

*****
So Jason – I came across your script for sale on Ebay for $30,000 and I must admit I was flabbergasted and amused by such an unorthodox approach. I love your chutzpah. Have you heard of fellow guerrilla marketers, the Robotard8000?

No I have not.

Have you had any serious inquiries? If so, have you sold the script? Why or why not?

I had one very serious inquiry. Some company in L.A., I don't want to give the name. We were in talks, they were going to buy the script, I sent them a business proposal, the partners were one day away from finalizing the deal when they had to get Board of Directors' approval, and it failed by two votes. One of the partners wanted to buy it outright by himself but decided against it. Very up and down process for me emotionally.

I’m sure you realize that listing your script on Ebay is way outside the usual steps for a screenwriter to sell a script. What made you decide to try this?

Basically it was a last resort. I wanted to produce this script myself, but my friend and fellow filmmaker moved to L.A. I listed it because I thought it would be a unique and hassle free way of selling my screenplay and maybe someone serious would notice it. My priorities have changed and I can't take the time and money that it takes to get a screenplay sold, pitched, or even read. It is nearly impossible to get your script even scimmed [sic] through in Hollywood without a foot in the door already. I would just love to see my screenplay made into a film, that is my dream.

How did you decide upon $30,000 as the value of the script?

Basically that is the top amount, I will accept reasonable offers. The deal I thought I had in place was not for the $30,000. I picked the brain of my friend in L.A., and we came up with the price.

Had you tried the usual steps to find representation for your writing prior to listing it on Ebay?

I entered the screenplay in a couple of competitions early on, got a couple of responses but nothing I wanted to follow through with.

What is your experience with screenwriting?

I was a journalism major in college, and co-wrote a couple of shorts that my friend and I filmed. One was called CONVENIENCE, kind of a horror-zombie style set in a convenience store.

What is your script about?

It is a 20something mob drama, about six to seven central characters. Set in NYC and a small midwest college town. I hear it is bad luck to completely tell the story and plot line before it is a done deal.

Why do you feel your script would make a great movie?

The beginning and end are extremely unique. It is very rare to see an original idea these days in Hollywood. I am sick of movies like GHOSTS OF GIRLFRIENDS PAST and THE PROPOSAL, we have seen these movies a thousand times. My movie is original.

If the script doesn’t sell, what do you plan to do next?

I will try a new way and interesting way to get my screenplay done. I love movies, most of all I love the storytelling aspect of movies and the escape that it brings to everyone's life.

Thank you so much, Jason. And good luck.

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Mixed Messages

Hello, Wavers! Did everybody have a nice Memorial Day weekend? I received a lengthy email from a client with a number of questions that I thought deserved a public answer since many of you may be able to relate. For ease of reading (and answering) I have translated the questions into very brief versions, distilling them down to the basic sentiments:

1. I keep getting different notes from different readers and different coverage companies. Some say "consider" and others say "pass." How the FRAK am I supposed to know what to do?

On this one, you have to take a deep breath and know that coverage, to a certain degree, is subjective. Though readers hew to certain standards, they are just people and until they invent the Auto-Reader 9000, you're stuck with that. The only advice I can give you is to take the notes that resonate for you and ignore those that do not.

2. Readers seem to have insanely high standards. It's like readers are keeping me out of Hollywood. How do I get around them? What do I make of ratings that I do not agree with?

Yes, readers have high standards. Most readers, and certainly those who work for The Script Department, come from the production company world, where giving a "consider" on a script is an act of putting one's job on the line. So readers are very hard on your script. They have to be. Giving a "consider" on a script means your boss has to read it this weekend. If your boss reads it over the weekend and disagrees that it warranted that - heads roll. So yes, sometimes readers will give a "pass" in lieu of "I'm not really sure." Believe it. I've been there. Sometimes a reader will lean on "consider with reservation" which amounts to "I'm not sure" but the production company world is quite harsh so readers work within that system. And it is a by-the-numbers system of rating and ranking scripts. Is it designed to keep you out? Yes, it is. But at a script coverage company such as The Script Department, we have no agenda except to help your writing improve. If we say your script is essentially a "pass" we mean it is not likely to fly at a production company.

Say you disagree. That's your prerogative and in fact, if you really, really disagree with that rating, then the choice is yours to go ahead and query/submit anyway. We in no way assume the authority or final word to tell you do NOT submit this script. We are just a safety system that gives you an idea of how it might fare at a production company if you submitted the draft we read.

Again, readers are tough and they are subjective. They try to be as objective as possible but they are just people doing a job. It is your gut feeling that rules what you do about your notes or about submitting the script, at the end of the day. We can't fish for you, but we can teach you how to fish. If you really disagree and think that the script just needs to get that one "yes" to get off the ground, you would be right - it does need one "yes" - that's all it takes. So it's possible that a "pass" rating by a script coverage reader might not dissuade an executive at just the right company for your script, who was in just the right mood. Use a system of odds: If three readers point out the same problem - you probably have a problem. If only one does, well, you have to use your gut instinct.

3. A reader I had recently made some comments about a particular world and situation I had set up and it was clear to me that she wasn't familiar with that particular milieu, and some of her opinions were incorrect because of that. I'm frustrated by that!

Say you're writing a script about fly fishing, or ticket scalping or space algae harvesting. When you submit that script to a production company, a reader will vet the script first. There is no way of ensuring that reader or any reader will indeed be familiar with a particular world of your script. Them's the breaks. Not every reader can have intimate knowledge of the particularity of your world. Say they ding you for stuff that you researched and know is correct.

There are two reactions you can have. One, bummer dude, you got dinged. The reader didn't get it. Try another company or reader. Subjectivity, human error and shortcomings are all an unfortunate reality in getting your material read in any venue. Essays, fiction, short fiction, scripts. Deal with it. Two, it is possible that you didn't make clear the particularity of the job or world or situation you were depicting. It is possible that had you done a better job, the reader, unfamiliar with 17th century butter churning or 21st century boiler rooms would have gotten it.

In fact, you have to plan for the possibility that not every reader who reads your script will "get" what you've written about. On the whole, because readers read such a large volume of scripts, they do have at least an inkling of what you're talking about. If they don't, they don't. I understand researchers are hard at work on the Auto-Reader which will make all coverages identical, with identical standards and results. I don't mean to be sarcastic, I mean to remind you that readers are people trained to execute a particular skill set in rapid delivery.

Rotten Rejections is a really great, entertaining and ultimately inspiring collection of rejections that famous literary authors received before going on to have huge success with the same book so insultingly rejected. Nabokov, for example, was told in a rejection letter that it would best if Lolita were "buried under a rock for a thousand years."

In fact, any Waver planning to go to the Great American Pitch Fest in Burbank this June 13th and 14th should definitely take my class, Top Ten Things Readers Hate (I actually think they politically correctly retitled it Top Ten Things Readers Aren't Crazy About or something...) and you will learn a ton of the practicalities of the life of a reader - what they get paid, how much they are expected to read, how they review scripts quickly, and more.

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Buy My Script. Now.

For some reason The Script Department has received a plethora of inquiries lately from very new writers who are very out of the loop. The upshot of the inquiries is always the same - I've written this great story that I really think is amazing and now I'd like you to tell me how to sell it.

It's very easy, if you're on the inside track, to find that kind of inquiry incredibly naive if not a bit...unsmart. But we who have been at this for awhile and have been through the wringer need to step back and realize that the desire to tell a story is a far cry from having an understanding of how this industry works. Show business is like any other business, on a certain level. Profit, loss, competition, egos, percentages, up and down swings. You wouldn't design a new car and go to Ford and say hi, I've designed this new car so will you buy it? It's not that simple. A) who the hell are you? and B) having designed a new car doesn't then mean a manufacturer is going to pour money into that design and market and sell that car. You wouldn't do some stuff in your kitchen and go to Chanel and say hi, I've come up with a new perfume, would you buy it please? Are you guys with me?

There seem to be two schools of thought when it comes to screenwriters trying to break in: The aforementioned, hi, buy my script and geez, it's gonna be great when I buy that new car and Hollywood is an effed up, monolithic, exclusionary machine and I'll never, ever break in. Neither is true.

Being a screenwriter is not a one-off, it's a long journey. So you've written a great script that you think would make a wonderful movie - congratulations! That really is an accomplishment to be proud of. Now get ready for the what-it's-like-to-be-a-writer part. Rejection. Silence. Notes. More notes. Existential angst. You write another script you think is a great story. Rejection. Silence. Notes. More notes. Existential angst. Wash, rinse, repeat.

Listen up, bright smiley noobs - there is no short path through this. It's what all writers go through. You are not special, blessed or supernaturally lucky. You are a writer. Or - are you? Because if the thought of toiling away again and again and meeting with only rejection makes you want to forget it and go for the promotion at work instead - please, save yourself the heartbreak and go for it. Hewlett Packard has great benefits.

The initial goal should be to learn the craft and learn it well. Which is a step that can take a long time and a lot of bad scripts that you thought were good scripts. Trust me on this one. After you have a stockpile of scripts, most of which are pretty bad and you know it, then you start writing scripts that are actually not bad. But they won't be very original. Rejection. Silence. Notes. More notes. Existential angst.

You'll get pretty hot, dirty and tired in this process. You'll have bitter days when reading the latest script sales or trade news makes you crazy. You'll want to quit, again and again. But something keeps pulling you back in. And you keep writing. Then finally you say eff it, I love this script. I got good notes on it. I feel good about it.

And then and only then is it time to try to find an agent or manager who believes your scripts are competitive on the marketplace. Notice I didn't say brilliant - I said competitive on the marketplace. Because Hollywood is one big hurly-burly marketplace of buying and selling. The wares are stories. And the market is hot and crowded, trust me on this. The agent or manager who represents you is the barker at a stall, trying to hawk your wares. And the only way he or she makes money when they pack up their booth at the end of the day, is if they can sell your script.

So you arrive on your camel, from the hot, dry desert with your wares - will you sell this for me? The agent or manager is going to look at your script, kick it some, check its teeth and make a decision. Man, that market is hot and tiring - am I gonna make some coin on this? Because I have those four other stories that are pretty bright and shiny. So why this one? Why this writer?
Trying to race around the desert and not travel through it first is going to result in chasing a mirage. You are not different from other writers who made the trek. You do not get a free pass. I'm sure your story is amazing - to you. I'm sure it was great to write it. And that feeling is the water that you store to replenish yourself along this journey. Validation, networking, studying, enjoying movies - that's the food and water you need to pack. Because the journey is very long. No, I cannot take your script, sight unseen, and get it to an agent or manager who will summarily buy it and make you rich rich.

Chances are, if you're reading this, you're thinking oh man, what dumb clucks - I know this already. But at one time you didn't know it. You had to learn. Probably through bitter experience. I know I did. Hoo, boy. What a bummer that writing a script does not then mean you sell it and get rich. But that's what separates the writers from the dabblers. Sure, I had a script I thought was great, 10 years ago. And it went precisely nowhere. I bundled up, got back on the camel and kept going. And I have a script now that I think is great. Now I'm actually in the marketplace - I can see the hawkers, I can smell the spices and hear the jingling of bells...it's all so close. But man, am I hot and dusty. And I have no guarantee whatsoever that I'm going to get a cool drink and buy a new camel. So you trundle on and you keep writing.

In a certain mood, these types of inquiries make me a bit irate. What, you think the art and the craft of writing a movie is that easy? So easy you can do it once and sell it? You think it's just a bunch of words and that you can learn it from some book and pull it off? But I take a deep breath and I realize that what looks like hubris is actually ignorance. An ignorance that is part of the journey. We all thought it would be way easier than it is to write a good script. We all thought we could get meetings pretty easily. We all figured that a script sale was a good but not terribly difficult thing. We can look back in laughter now, can't we? But that ignorance serves two functions - it gives us the blissful unawareness necessary to join this camel train in good cheer, and it gives us a milestone to look back on. If I knew then what I know now...

It's okay to be totally naive to this industry - it's complicated and full of mirages. One such mirage is that of instant fame and money. Don't you believe it. Keep that water and food for your journey and keep following the North Star. The marketplace is there - that's quite real - you can smell the spices and hear the barkers shouting even now, can't you? But you cannot take a shortcut to it. And not everyone who gets there is going to see their wares for sale. But that's the thing, isn't it? The mystery, the surprise, the sheer adrenaline of trying?

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Character Accents

Dear Rouge Wave:

One of my characters speaks with an Irish accent. How do I indicate that? Do I write all his dialogue phonetically or do I indicate in a wryly every time he speaks that he has an accent?

-Top O' The Morning in Tipperary

Dear Top O' - when writin' a character wi' a wee bit of an accent, ye don't want te gobsmack the reader over and over agin wi' it, do ye then? It can become a wee bit annoyin', so? The reader'll sure te go arse over tea feckin' kettle wi' keepin' up wi' ye, isn't it?

Note the first time the character speaks that he or she has an accent and let it go at that. The reader will remember and beyond that, a more powerful way to really show that this character is from somewhere else is to us a few colloquialisms from their place of origin. In other words, if we're dealing with an Irishman, there's more to the fact that he's Irish than the way he speaks, right? Sure, you might use some specific words like arse or cuppa but don't over do it and don't bother trying to write the dialogue in a way that evokes the accent. That's for the actor to interpret. I have well and truly seen writers put a wryly that says (in a Spanish accent) over ever single line of dialogue for a character - which is super annoying - I got it the first time, thank you very much. Talk about ass over tea kettle and cluttering up your script. Don't do it.

What you are really indicating is that this person is from Ireland (or wherever). So you might throw in a few word choices that indicate that but beyond that, dig deeper - what does it mean that your character is from Ireland? It means your character has a different frame of reference, a different way of looking at the world and a slightly different way of expressing him or herself. If a character is from Canada, I don't need to literally see in the dialogue that he says "aboot" - I get it already. It's all in the set up of that character on the very first page that we meet him. If you do it well, I won't forget where he's from. If you hit me over the feckin' head wi' it, I'm gonna get real cranky on your arse.

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Sending out Queries

Dear Rouge Wave:

Earlier today, I called about 10 smallish, indie production companies that I researched and thought would be right for my script and asked them if they read query letters. Only one company responded in the affirmative and I think that was because she didn't really know the answer. Everyone is always saying aspiring screenwriters have to query and see how the response is. So my question is, how (why) are we supposed to send our query when they admittedly don't / won't read it? I don't want to waste my time faxing a bunch of places only for my letter to be trashed. Am I going about things the wrong way? I have lived in LA for over a year and don't have many industry connections and have to start somewhere, so any advice you have would be great!

-Flummoxed in Florida

Dear Flummoxed,

There are two routes for an aspiring screenwriter to take when querying. Querying agents and managers or querying production companies directly. Most production companies do not accept unsolicited material; but of course there are some that do. If you are wanting to send your script (ultimately, right?) to a production company and simply want to know if they'll read your query, you're doing the right thing - you just call and ask. But. You want to ask in such a way that they think gee whiz - we should definitely read this script!

So in other words, rather than calling and saying hello, do you accept queries - which leaves the door open for a quick "nope, goodbye," you want to call and introduce yourself as the writer of a great horror script (or whatever genre that production company tends to produce - please tell me you did your homework on that part) and you'd love to send it in for a read and who should you direct the query to? Sometimes the person answering the phone is an assistant or intern whose main directive is to keep random callers away from their boss. Sometimes the person answering the phone IS the boss - it depends on the company. So be very respectful when you call because you just don't know what the situation is in that particular company.

So my nutshell advice would be to research each company a bit first using IMDB Pro, the HCD Online or if you're very lucky, Studio System. Make sure that what you've written is at all a fit for this company. Second, when you call, really pitch yourself. Do it briefly but do it effectively. So for example:

Hi, my name is Melody Writesalot and I'm a writer with a great romantic comedy that I think might be a great fit for your company - are you looking for material right now? When they answer yes, say fantastic, can I send a logline and synopsis? And to whom should I direct that?

If they say no, obviously you thank them very professionally and get off the line. Keep it brief, be prepared to send a synopsis, and make sure you have targeted the production company carefully. Many writers can, do and will circumvent the phone call and just go ahead and query via email. But I personally think a phone call is a faster, more effective way to make sure you don't send an unwanted query. You can make the same inquiry via email, by the way. Almost as effective except your email can also be ignored. And yes, there are some companies that don't really want the phone calls either. You really have no way of knowing until you try. Letters can be ignored. Emails can be ignored. Phone calls can get shut down. There's no one right way and there's no guarantee. Get used to it.

Don't feel bad about the nine companies that said "no" about accepting query letters. That's the way it goes. Could be they aren't looking for new material right now. Could be they don't accept scripts or queries that don't come from an agent or manager. Rejection is the norm for writers. You have joined a grand tradition of suckage. I know how frustrating it is, believe me.

If you continue to hear "no" time after time, you may want to pursue representation instead. Now, normally, I would absolutely recommend representation as the first tack, not the second, but sometimes, smaller production companies are not super concerned with that and if they read your script, liked it and wanted to work with you, you can use an entertainment attorney or you can then get on the phone with some smaller managers and say look, I have X production company who would like to work with me and this script and I need rep.

The biggest mistake you can make is obviously sending a script that is not ready for prime-time. If you're going to pre-query via phone, have your excellent, brief, scintillating little speech down pat. Be prepared to get shut down rudely. Be prepared to be asked some questions. Be prepared to send a GREAT logline and synopsis. Be prepared to send a GREAT script.

If you have done all of the above and are still getting "no thanks" when you call, take it in stride. It's the way it goes. Just keep trying.

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But - Why?

Once in awhile we get them at The Script Department. And at competitions and production companies too. Grand Guignol, slasher, gorenography scripts. I remember reading one in particular, years ago when I worked for another script coverage service, that made me physically ill. I told my boss - don't ever assign a script like that to me again. I felt violated. As if by reading this awful stuff, my mind had been invaded by the nightmares of a twisted writer. Thanks for that. Thanks for letting me get a peek into your world. And what did I get in return? An insight? An amazing twist? No. Just images that will take me weeks if not months to erase from my mind.

Now, it would seem as if the era of gorenography is well and truly over. But you still see the scripts, now and again. And they are so off-putting that even readers cringe. Which is saying a lot. You have to get up pretty early in the morning to shock a reader. But it's not shock so much as total revulsion. And it's pretty darn hard to assess the box office potential, theme and craft of a script when you want to puke your guts out while reading it. And, as chance would have it, one of my readers was assigned a script recently that gave her the same feeling. How could she cover a script when she felt physically ill reading it? Well - it's hard.

But the number one question to ask the writer when reading a script like this is: Why? What does it mean? What are you really saying here? And who is your audience? After the shock, after the horror, after the needing to barf behind the theater - what will audiences take away from this experience? What new insights will they have?

Now, I know that this topic applies to only .5% of the screenwriting population because scripts of this nature are few and far between. Thank goodness. But the larger lesson still applies - why? Why are you telling this story? What will audiences take away from it? After the explosions, after the romantic encounter, why are you telling this story? What is your contribution to the story telling tradition?

Audiences, and cave people gathered around a fire before them, simply want to be entertained. They want to take their minds off of their own lives for two hours. But they have a deeper need as well. They want to feel. We need to feel. Dread, hope, anger, love - that's why we go to the movies.

So whether you're writing drama, romcom, sci-fi or horror - what is your audience getting in the way of entertainment and feeling? Not YOU - the audience. Now, we know that you need to feel the same emotions yourself as you write the script but you have to bear in mind that you are, at the end of the day, creating a product meant to interact with an audience. So take a step back from your script and ask - how and why is this entertaining...not to you but to millions of movie-goers?

And if you are writing something deeply shocking, doubly so you must ask - why? What is the meaning of this material? Being shocking is easy. Being violent is easy. Stirring up primal feelings is easy. We all fear being murdered. We all want to throw up when we see someone being dismembered. But - why?

In GOODFELLAS the opening scene - a man being stabbed in the trunk of a car - is fairly shocking. But as the story begins to unfold, we learn about the world within which this type of violence exists and why. It isn't violence for violence's sake - it is grounded in time, place and character. Pesci is a loose cannon. And he will ultimately pay for that. Even in the world of brutal mob violence, there is a code and there are consequences.

THE STRANGERS is actually a pretty good movie, and the bottom line was that there was no reason for the events that took place. When asked why the attackers were targeting the doomed couple, they say "because you were home." Which is a very memorable - and awful - moment. And while THE STRANGERS is a very scary and somewhat upsetting movie, it didn't cross the line of out-and-out tendon snapping, organ pulsing, brain matter spattering. I took away an insight into disconnect, chaos and random violence. To me, THE STRANGERS speaks to that basic fear we all have that as ordered as our own lives are, random violence still lurks. But again, this was not pure gorenography, either.

Readers are just people. People with families, pets and rent to pay. If what you've written is an orgy of blood spatters and shock value so off-putting that the reader gives the script back and says nope, I won't read this - Houston, you got quite a problem. Because readers are the gatekeepers. Yes, they have specialized skills and have read hundreds if not thousands of scripts but think of readers as Every Audience Member. And if you can't get past a reader, you're sunk.

So pull it back, tone it down or at minimum answer the big question: Why? What are audiences going to feel beyond terror and revulsion? Alfred Hitchcock knew that real, primal fear comes from what you do NOT see. A bomb ticking under the table of a group of unaware diners is a thousand times scarier than a person coming straight at a character with a knife. Dread is much more potent than simply watching something play out. If we wanted to see a body dismembered, we'd sign up for an anatomy class.

Write what you will, write what you care about, but check in with yourself and make sure you aren't writing something shocking just to be shocking. Because the shock factor alone will not be enough to hide poor character development, weak structure, lack of theme or anything else.

Once the reader has regained some equilibrium and decided against lunch for a couple more hours, he or she is going to ask: How does this material comment on humanity? What does it reveal about us? What is entertaining about this? How will audiences react? If a reader can't stomach your script, then the exec in charge won't be able to either.

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Somebody Got There First

Well. It finally happened. You read the trades and you see it. A script that has sold that is exactly like the script you have been working on for months. Even the title is similar. Sure, sure, some of the details are different but the premise - yeah, that was your premise. And now it's out there and you're done for. Right?

Well, not exactly. Look, this is not a good situation, there's no two ways about it. If someone just SOLD a script that shares the same basic idea as yours, well, that puts you in a pretty disadvantageous position if you are a totally unknown, unrepped writer. Not quite as disadvantageous if you're repped and a known entity. Sometimes movies are released in twos: PAUL BLART and OBSERVE AND REPORT are a recent example. Then of course, ARMAGEDDON and DEEP IMPACT is probably the most famous example.

But there's a big difference between you, Joe Writer from Somewhere, working on a script and Joe Hollywood Writer who just sold a similar script. There's not really going to be an arms race there to get your movie into production as well. So if that is your situation, you're pretty much screwed. And you know what? It happens. And yes, you will cry in your soup for a few days. What an awful feeling. All that hard work for nothing.

But is it for nothing? No. It is not. Complete your script. Make it the best iteration of your take on the premise as possible. Why? Because you now have a great sample. And yes, when and if you get meetings, your script will be compared to the script that was sold - but that's okay. You are aware of that and this is a sample. To not be aware would be the biggest sin, honestly. But you're not going to query using this script. It's going to be in your kit bag as a sample. That's really the only big shift that's going to happen for you. This script is not going to the point of the spear for you. But in the big picture, while that's disappointing - well, let's be honest, it's really a blow - you still have other scripts in your arsenal.

And an arsenal is what you need to have. I know how exciting it feels to finish a script and query with it. But many writers forget that you need to have others that are also in great shape as samples of your writing. Ideally, you should have two or more really great scripts aside from the one you are querying with.

So if you find that a script quite similar to yours is out on the marketplace, just sold or even released in theaters, give yourself a minute to feel the burn of that. It's natural. But do not give up on that script. Focus on your craft and voice and screenwriting skills. Make your script the best mall cop script you personally could write. And then add it to your stack of samples. Then move on to a new script, one that you do trust is totally unique...and start again.

There's no way to prevent this situation from arising. We writers are all out there reading the newspaper and brainstorming and observing life and so it's only a matter of time before someone else has an idea similar to your own. And that writer might execute the script faster, they might be repped or lucky or an alien life form - and they get their script on the market first. So while I hope this never happens to you, if it does, stay calm, hang onto your script and make sure it is a GREAT draft because when you get into a meeting in which a rep is seriously entertaining taking you on, it is still part of your body of work. Not knowing that there is a script or movie like yours already out there - now that would be embarrassing. So do read the trades and stay up on script sales.

Here are some resources for following what's selling:

Done Deal Pro
Tracking B

-and the highly entertaining Script Girl.

So if you have been the victim of Somebody Got There First, breathe it out and do not give up on your script. You need great samples and though the issue was forced, this is a great sample. Never miss an opportunity to learn while you are on this journey. Never write a half-assed script and then let it languish in a drawer. Every script you write is potentially a great sample or, of course, in the best outcome possible, the script that got you repped - or even sold.

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Don't Take That Tone With Me

What is the tone of your script? Well, clearly the tone should reflect the genre, right? Yes, of course it should. And if it doesn't, your script is in trouble and so is the rating it will receive on a coverage report. Tone is one of what I call the "off-grid" ratings when you receive coverage. Remember, the usual rating grid that accompanies a coverage includes:

Premise
Storyline
Character
Dialogue

Those are the big four. Now, to recap, premise refers to the IDEA, the basic jumping off point. Is it clear, does it pay off, is it original? Storyline refers to the narrative (and obliquely, the structure). In other words, HOW was the story told? How was the pacing and the style of the narrative itself? Character and dialogue are self-explanatory although a mystery to me is why the two are split up as separate categories. I have never seen good character work accompany bad dialogue or vice versa. I don't make the rules, guys, I just observe them.

Off-grid categories are screenwriting elements that don't appear on the grid but that are being judged in the coverage anyway: Tone, Theme, World, Logic, Stakes.

So we return to tone. Inconsistent tone might result in a romping romcom which includes some kind of climatic bar fight between the two rivals which suddenly reads like a scene from UNDER SIEGE. A tense horror script can have a playful love scene straight out of WHEN HARRY MET SALLY. A sci-fi script might suddenly have a sequence with the weighty dramaturgic leanings of TWELVE ANGRY MEN. And that can be cool, man. That can be really taking your script to the next level. If you pull it off. But pulling it off means that scene or sequence needs to have something in common with the tone of the rest of the script.

You need to make sure that the tone in your script - the tone you set on page one - is consistent through-out. Sometimes writers like to go full bore (not to be confused with full retard) and impress a reader with a NASTY fight scene - and hey, hats off - except this is a romantic comedy. Or - oh, oh, this is not uncommon - a graphic sex scene in the middle of a romcom. The couple is falling into bed together and suddenly things get a bit hardcore. And it's like a record needle goes scccrriiitch!

A reader can tell when there're problems with the tone when they suddenly realize they aren't sure how they are supposed to be feeling. That realization could happen on page five, it could happen on page 62. But it happens. Confusion sets in. I know that sounds almost too casual a reflection to point to and yet - it is the best way I can articulate the gut feeling a reader gets when the tone is a problem. Is this - funny? Is this - scary? Should I be laughing here? I'm not sure. Houston - we have a problem.

How do you make sure the tone of your script is consistent? Make sure you are nailing the expectations of your genre, first of all, in terms of structure, character work and theme. Then pay attention to the language you use.

We know that language is a many splendored thing. I can say "where have you been" in about 10 ways and each would convey a different emotion and intensity. How many of you have written an email to someone (or god forbid, a letter!) and labored over each word, deleting, rewriting and carefully guiding what you are trying to say so that the missive is received in the way you want it to be received? An example I think we can all relate to is an email or text message to someone we like - but to whom we don't want to give that away. Is the message too familiar? Too funny? Does it sound needy? We work and rework the message until it sounds inviting but neutral, playful but non-committal. You know you've done it. It is important that the message be received with a clear intentionality.

And so it goes with screenwriting. If you are writing a Western, you want to make sure the script conveys a sense of adventure, opportunity and lawlessness or maybe bleak existential survival. Clearly, your romcom is going to convey a sense of fun, laughter and romance. Make sure that if you're writing an action-thriller that the tone is, well, actiony and thrillery. Horror should convey tension and fear. Which doesn't mean you can't have a light-hearted or funny moment in your horror script - but make sure that sequence doesn't read like it came from a totally different script. The words you choose to use are a huge part of the tone you are establishing. And the pacing of the action will be a huge part of that tone as well.

Think about the way you want the reader (or later, viewer) to FEEL while reading your script. Think of the words you choose to use - EVERY word - the dialogue, the names of your characters, the names of the locations, the WAY the sun rises in a scene - as powerful tools to evoke a feeling in your script.

This is the first paragraph after the first slugline in the thriller that my partner, JP Smith and I wrote, the one that I have lately referred to here on TRW:

The western horizon is bruised and purple, punctuated by distant lightning. Rain is coming. The last hint of sun fades into darkness as cars swish by the tall pines and thick brush along the interstate...

Sound kinda ominous? It should. If this were the opening for a romcom, even if the sun were setting I promise the word "bruised" would be nowhere near this description. Or "distant lightning" or "fades into darkness." We are using these scant 35 words to set the tone of the script to follow. The lake in our script is "dark and rippling." The house is quiet. The neighbors are SUPER cheerful. All in service of a creepy tone which is like the yellow brick road leading the reader into an inescapably tense story.

So make sure to use language in the service of the TONE you are conveying. And make sure that all scenes and sequences are consistent with that established tone as well. I am sure you are quite capable of writing an explicit sex scene, super violent fight or very serious and dramatic scene - but does that scene belong in THIS script? Don't get dinged for blowing the consistency of your tone.

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Networking: Jucandoit!

Good morning, Wavers. I have spoken before about the importance of networking in building and growing your writing career. It's part of the Five-a-Day (Write, Promote, Network, Learn, Live Well). But sometimes networking can give writers an anxiety attack. When do you network and when do you not network? Network all the time at any opportunity. But say you are going to an event specifically designed for networking. How can you handle the anxiety, shyness or overwhelm-ment that can be attendant to such things?

Today we have a guest blog written by Keith Tutera, the newly hired Creative Director for The Script Department. If you've seen our new website and marveled at the look and the catchy copy, you have Keith to thank. He's young, he's hip, he's hilarious and he can network like nobody's bidness. Indeed, part of his job description is making connections and growing relationships. And we couldn't have hired anybody more skilled at doing just that. So today Keith has a few words for Wavers who know they should be networking but may need some tips and motivation:

***

So you’ve managed to gussy yourself up, find parking, and make an entrance without face-planting. Now what? For those of us who weren’t endowed with networking chops from birth (i.e. most writers), attending a networking event can be intimidating, even downright scary. EEK!

Fear not, Wavers, with a little bit of courage and a lot of common sense you’ll have them eating out of your hand. But like any good scout you must come prepared. And that doesn’t just mean having stacks of freshly printed cards on impressive card stock a la American Psycho. You’ve got to be mentally prepared.

Begin your night with some simple visualization exercises. Envision yourself meeting lots of people, having a great time, and exchanging lots of cards. Concentrate on your breathing as you do this, and as you begin to feel the excitement and confidence build — hold onto that feeling, and (here’s the tricky part) EXPECT to feel it again when you arrive. Your successful night will become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

For those of you who are reading this thinking that sounds like some California flim-flam hocus-pocus (ok, I am writing this from Venice Beach), allow me to offer an alternate suggestion — laughter. It can defuse tension in pretty much any situation.

Consider the following:

Last night my friend Linda and I attended a networking event for the Ivy Plus Society as guests of our friend, Adam. Being that neither of us are Ivy Leaguers (I myself went to UT, a “Public Ivy” and Linda went to UA, a fine institution, but nonetheless, no Ivy) we were both mildly intimidated. Especially since we were all arriving separately. Would they smell our non-Ivyness a mile away and pin us with The Scarlet Letter? Would we be tarred, feathered, and ridden out on a rail?

So what did we do about it? Did we fret, lament, and pull our hair out in neurotic anticipation? No, we made jokes. Linda told me that if anyone asked where I went to school, I should look them straight in the face and tell them that I just got my Associates degree from El Camino Community College. I laughed about that the entire drive to Hollywood. And if anyone asked where she was from, I told her to tell them that she grew up on a pile of dirt and was a 100% self-made woman. She got a kick out of that one.

And do you know what happened? We got to the insanely crowded venue in such good moods that we were relaxed and good to go. And we ended up meeting a bunch of really, really nice, interesting people. And we never even had to use our lines. In fact, I think one person asked me where I went to school the entire night and when I told her she was complimentary and kind.

Now, on to some networking tips:

Establish rapport first
Play it cool. Make sure there’s a vibe. When there isn’t - and someone thinks there is - you feel like you’re, well, being networked. It’s kinda hard to describe if you’ve never experienced it, but to suffice it to say it feels like an invasive procedure.

Once you’ve established a rapport, use it to network
About 99% of the people I met last night were lawyers, and I wanted to meet entertainment industry folk. So you know what I did? I asked some of the lawyers I got chummy with if they knew anyone there in the industry. Genius, right? Guess what — it worked. Introductions were made and it went very smoothly. But you gotta go with your gut — if I’d asked someone who wasn’t feeling it, I could have received a very awkward, “uhm...well...uh...”

Don’t be afraid to be bold - push yourself out of your comfort zone
At another event last week I walked by a group of people, one of whom I overheard saying that he had just posted an ad on Craigslist for a script doctor. I took a big swig of my beer, steeled myself, and went over and handed him a Script Department card and introduced myself in front of the whole group. He was super cool - as was the whole group - and before I knew it the rest of the group was asking me for cards, too. But this isn’t for everybody - it’s important to know your limitations. Whatever you do, do it with confidence, or don’t do it at all.

Should you drink? How much?
Ahh...the ubiquitous alcohol — a blessing and a curse. I recommend drinking enough to grease the wheels in the beginning, and then enough throughout to keep them greased, but not so much that they fall off the car. This is business, remember? The last thing you want to be is the guy that got sloshed and started getting handsy with the wrong girl. You know, that guy.

Above all else, DON’T BE PUSHY. And READ THE SIGNALS. They’re there
I met a guy at an event a few months ago who wanted me to teach an online course on his website. Faintly interested, I asked him to send me the link to his site, and told him that I would follow up with him if it seemed like a good fit, but [hint, hint] that I had a lot going on. No sooner did I get the words out of my mouth then he asked if it would be ok to follow up with me in a week or so. No, it’s not ok. I just told you I would follow up with you IF I were interested.

So get out there, Wavers. You have something to offer - remember that.

Position yourself as a center of influence - the one who knows the movers and shakers. People will respond to that, and you'll soon become what you project.
~Bob Burg

Originally from Washington, DC, Keith Tutera is a proud Public Ivy Graduate of the University of Texas at Austin where he earned a Master's Degree in Advertising. Having worked at illustrious ad agencies like DDB, McCann Erickson and Deutsch, Keith is an award-winning copywriter and master networker. The Script Department couldn't be prouder or happier to have him on board.

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Ping Me

So this pinging thing - how did it become part of the vernacular? Ping me! I'll ping you! Let's ping him! Nonetheless it is descriptive. It's a nudge. A tinny hello down the wires. A wink. A nod. A Riiiiiicolla! (I can't for the life of me understand why Ricola me didn't take off as a colloquialism but then again I never thought the internal combustion engine would be a hit so color me dense.)

So where were we? Ah yes, pinging. Pinging might in another, more formal blog also be described as "following up." You meet someone at a networking event. They agree to "have coffee" or "read your script" but when you ping them a week later, they ignore your email. I say ignore because they saw it all right. But they had post-networking-why-did-I-promise-that regrets. So you wait another week or three and ping them again. They feel bad so they at least email back with some probably semi-true story about being very "slammed." You wait another month and ping them again.

Now this is the turning point. The fork in the road. One of two things is going at this juncture:

They are either truly, deeply annoyed and forward your email to their assistant with the note Who is this jackass? Tell him I'm having face surgery for the rest of my life!

or -

They break down some and think you know what, fine, I'll have ONE CUP OF COFFEE with this person.

I know this because I have done it. Broken down and had a cup of coffee with someone who kept pinging me. Partly out of assuaging my own feelings that I have been perhaps rude and partly - no wait - no, that's it. Just to not feel like a rude, cold or unfeeling person.

How can you tell if you've pung one too many times? Are you being persistent or are you stalking? Well, I would think that if someone SAID they'd have coffee with you or read your script, if they looked you right in the eye and said that, that you have some latitude with the pinging. Even if you feel rude or oddly persistent. Even when you're beginning to feel like a wallflower begging for a dance. Keep pinging. Politely. Sporadically. Ask the person you're pinging how they are. Comment on their latest hilarious blog entry, their script sale or fabulous new hair cut. Flattery will get you everywhere. Because what's going to happen is that you might just wear the person down and because you pinged that one, last time - they will probably break down and meet you finally.

Now I know this sounds counterintuitive, you're thinking, gosh, if I met an agent or manager at a pitch fest for example, and I ping them more than once or twice, aren't I some kind of creepy, entitled CAPE FEAR person?? The more I ping, the more annoyed they get - it'll have the opposite effect. Well - it can. It sure can. But that persistence could also lead to an amazing opportunity, introduction or relationship. You may just ping the object of your pinging on a day when he or she is bored and they might think you know what - FINE - I'll meet this kid/writer for ONE beverage. And that could be your lucky day. Persistence can pay. I have met a number of people for coffee over time because they were politely persistent or because I was politely persistent. No guarantee any professional relationship will arise - but who knows, right?

So you've met a writer, actor, producer, agent or manager at an event. Here's two to-ping-or-not-to-ping scenarios:

Scenario One:
The person you have met is polite but a bit distant and they do NOT agree to read your work, meet you or anything else. They don't offer a business card either. In fact, they move backward slightly while you talk and scan the room over your shoulder. They are polite and pleasant but totally vague.

Should you ping them later? Not if they didn't give your their business card and not if they expressed zero interest in you or your script. No random pinging, please. If they did give you their card but your experience of them was not particularly energized, ping them once, ping them twice - and definitely let it go. They're just not that into you. You'll get put on the "no call" list. I know of two super persistent pingers this happened to. Believe it. If you get rebuffed by silence more than three times - you're not pinging anymore - you're stalking.

Scenario Two:
The person you met was warm and friendly; they looked you in the eye and when you asked if they can read your script or have coffee sometime they nodded, smiled and said "sure." They really looked at you, man, they really SAW you.

Should you ping this person? Did they mean what they said? Well, they were probably punch drunk and on auto-pilot when said they'd read your work or meet you for coffee. They said that to 10 other people too. They don't remember your name, they don't care that much but it was the polite thing to say. Should you ping them? Oh, of course. Ping once, ping twice, ping three times before you give up trying, in this scenario.

Pinging persistently can absolutely pay off and pay off big. You might actually get that script read, or form a new professional relationship. But do your pinging well. If you ping someone for the first time, do it about three to four days after you met them. Hey, met you at the thing with the thing, just wanted to thank you for an informative evening, love to have coffee some time. Done. You hear nothing back, so ping them again in about three to four weeks - Hey so and so, just checking in. How's your thing with the thing? I read about your sale in the trades - congratulations! My script is coming along pretty well. In fact, I wondered if you might have time for a coffee? No accusations, no guilt-tripping, no you-never-answered-my-other-email. NO NO NO. When pinging be as obsequious the second time as you were the first time. Remind the pingee where you met. Do NOT expect them to remember you.

Persistence can be very high yield - you never know - it might just be your lucky day when you ARE able to meet up with someone in person who might be able to help you out. After three pings (at the most) please let it go.

Remember, part of the reason people agree to "read your script" or "meet you for coffee" is that they are doing a rapid-fire calculus - maybe this writer is someone I WANT to know...they never know, right? But people are busy and they do forget, so keep pinging every once in awhile until the silence or "I'm slammed" blow-offs are loud and clear to you.

There are some who would disagree with me and would champion pinging ad infinitum. I personally send those pings to my assistant with the face-surgery-into-perpetuity note. But maybe that's just me. If you have gotten a note from my assistant with any kind of blow off, you've pung too much.

Now get back to work. And find somebody to ping.

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How Good Are Free Notes?

An unnamed Waver sent me an email this morning - she was upset. Someone on a message board offered to give her notes, and within the notes, this selfless person rewrote some of the dialogue. The Waver was really upset by this - naturally - and wondered if that's kosher or if maybe she needs thicker skin. Now in the interest of full disclosure, I have read that particular script and while like any script, it has room for improvement, dialogue is not one of those areas. She writes great dialogue and has had a lot of positive things come from that script.

Getting notes for free (or cheap) from message board types can be heaven and it can be hell. Some who offer free notes really are quite good at it - and others - well, they aren't very experienced. This is what bad note givers do (and yes, this has happened to me, a million years ago):

Bad note givers are totally SUBJECTIVE. They give their opinion based on what they like and how they would write this story. But it's not their story. They make overt suggestions ala what THEY would do if the story were theirs. Sometimes they'll change or suggest dialogue to the way they would like to see it written. Cardinal no-no.

Bad note givers have an unearned sense that they KNOW what is good and what is bad. And usually this vibe comes across in the notes. Ergo, bad note givers put the writer on the defensive.

Because some free note giver on a message board offers to give you notes doesn't mean that they'll be bad - or good. The stumbling block is that you'll be on the defensive very quickly because the free note giver has very little experience doing this. So the jumping off point is dysfunctional; they aren't experienced, so they have no authority in your view, and you'll get defensive and they might be too subjective...and the whole experience can be a mess.

Free notes are hit or miss. The problem is that if they are a miss, the writer is left with a feeling of having been judged by someone not qualified to judge them...and even if there were salient points, they will not hear those points. It's like I said about the spoonful of sugar.

Giving good notes is like being a therapist - oh, sure, the therapist sits there in their cashmere scarf sipping tea, all curled up in their chair and they seem very ordinary - they don't discuss your issues with you from a technical standpoint - they get you comfortable but while you're talking, they're running your issues through their Psychology Degree Learning Background and searching for and addressing issues that have distinct jumping off points from an academic point of view. But when they talk to you, they put it in such a way that makes you feel comfortable. Something good is happening in this interaction but it's beneath the surface. If they asked you questions more directly, you'd shut down and now the session is useless. It's about how to get people to open up and hear you.

Free (and bad) note givers don't have enough experience working with writers to use this methodology. They may (or may not) have some good points to make on the script but they don't know how to deliver that information in such a way that the writer feels empowered. And though they'd never admit it in a million years, they get ego-gratification about pointing out what's wrong with your script because somewhere deep inside there's a little voice saying I could do this better than you.

A professional reader doesn't have that voice because they just don't care enough. They don't know you, they have nothing invested in who's a better writer. It's a job. On a message board, there's sometimes a weird, gossipy thing that goes on where someone offers to give you notes, and then they can sort of say on the board, in hushed tones - Oh, I read that script - it really isn't that great. It's one-upmanship. Professional readers aren't into that. They aren't going to go to CURLYGIRL3 and say Hey, did you know that FOXYCHICK isn't a very good writer? Did you know that? She posts so much about her accomplishments but she's really not that great!

A lot of writers can fall into one-upmanship. It happens. A writer is getting traction on a script and suddenly everyone wants to read it. Know why this happens? Not because they are truly curious as to what makes a script gain traction but because they secretly want to say - Oh. It's not really that great. I have NO idea why that script is at William Morris. Hmmph.

That's happened to me recently. The script my partner and I have being packaged at WMA or ICM (whoever bites first; we should know early next week) so it can go to DreamWorks with a producer attached has already engendered several minor acquaintances asking to see it. We've had this script going for awhile now and nobody was interested before. Now they are. Color me cynical (which is not my usual color) but there's a negative subtext there. Now, naturally, when a script is on the launching pad, I would never send it to anyone, especially on the interwebs. If that script got passed around and read and forwarded - it could kill the project. Which would add to the 9,000 other reasons the script could get killed anyway. So why should I risk that right now? But the larger question is - why do people want to read it? To comfort themselves. It's really not THAT great. I could do a better job. Why is THIS script in the position it's in? Because this is bullshit and I could do better. Lovely sentiments, all.

But I've been guilty of it myself - you hear about a script sale and you think - Huh, I read that and I wasn't very impressed. No matter how nice you normally are, a little green devil climbs out of your pocket and begins to whisper in your ear - This isn't fair. I'm a better writer than that person!

But you know what - there's no rhyme or reason to what sells. There really isn't. I'll be the first to say that while I'm proud of our thriller, it's not brilliance. It's just good. It works, it's well written but it's hardly IN BRUGES. I'm realistic about the script, I'm no puffed shirt. It's a good idea, executed well, with a modest budget and some good roles. If that sells, I'll be a happy girl. If it falls flat, I'm no worse for the wear. No existential spirals for me. You just keep doing what you do.

To get back on topic, free notes can be a nice thing to receive but please, please consider the source. And if you OFFER to give free notes, ask yourself this - what is your agenda? Can you set aside your ego and just be honest? Are you really qualified to do this? I mean, sometimes a person will say hey, I just want your knee-jerk opinion. Did you laugh? Did you like it? Well, just about anybody is qualified to do that and that's a nice thing. But do check in with your motivation on giving or receiving free notes. If you are getting the notes, are you secretly looking for praise or respect? If you are giving them are you secretly hoping to establish that YOU are the better writer?

That's why I advocate just paying someone. Look, doesn't have to be MY company which is the best in the business (you knew I was going to say that, I couldn't disappoint!) but if you pay someone, then it's a business transaction and unless you get someone horrible (and there are services to avoid) you should get a straight up evaluation and skip the Ego Rumble.

Signs that your super cool free read was a very bad idea:

You feel defensive and upset.
The notes contain snarky comments and put-downs.
The person who offered is a blowhard on your local message board.
The notes are specific, not global and the reader offered advice that you dislike.
The person uses the word "I" a lot. (I liked this. I didn't like that. I would do this. I wouldn't do that.)
The person actually rewrote or suggested dialogue.
The person made plot suggestions that do not fit and spin the script in a totally new direction.

So (non) buyer beware. Free notes are a blessing and a curse. You need to vet who's offering. And you need to check in with yourself - can you set your ego aside? Can you take what makes sense and dump the rest? Do you respect this person? Do they know a lot about screenwriting or do they just claim to give totally honest feedback? I will be totally honest with you is often a code for: I'll rake you over the coals to make myself feel better. Believe it. I've been on the receiving end of that and I do think that experience in some ways led me to my current philosophy that giving notes must be done in such a way that it is respectful and palatable. Because if I'm going to take the time to read your script I want you to get something out of it. Not me. You.

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If I Knew Then....

Gary Goldstein, the erudite and inspired producer of PRETTY WOMAN, is working on a set of audio books for screenwriters. I am honored to have been one of the professionals he has chosen to interview with my consulting as a jumping off point for my particular input. The title of my section is: If I Knew Then What I Know Now - and it's aptly titled. I was going to pull some of the questions from that section for today's blog but I think I'll leave that for the actual interview this Friday. But it inspired me to share with you today what my biggest What I Know Now lesson was. Well, it's not really one lesson, it's a bunch of lessons and if I had to be pithy and use one word to describe that group of lessons I would say it's: PATIENCE.

There is an urban myth among screenwriters - particularly newer ones, that goes like this:

I will write a script, I will query with that script, I will get repped, the manager will sell the script and I will put hundreds of thousands of dollars in my bank account and I will buy an island somewhere, equipped with a Blu-Ray, a private jet and dancing girls with coconuts. I will be interviewed, I will go to the premiere of my movie, I will be employed thereafter as a working (and somewhat vaunted) screenwriter. I practice my interviews in the shower now. I'm a genius! Why didn't I think of this like 10 years ago when I had that crappy job! Screenwriting is GREAT!

I thought all that stuff would be true too. I really did. You know, probably without dancing girls, more like I don't know, Viggo Mortensen would be my best friend and I would order trays of crudites from my chaise lounge by my pool, but of course, what a bitter lesson it was so learn the truth. My truth went something like this:

I will write a script and I will query and get no bites except from that one guy in Florida. I will feel excited but vaguely uneasy. Nothing will happen with that script. But hey, I must be pretty good! I will write another script and the same thing will happen except I get absolutely no replies to any of my queries. I will read about other people selling specs and buying islands and feel embittered or maybe impassioned and I will be tempted to quit in a huff but I don't. I keep trying. I will feel like I don't possibly have time to write when I have my job and my family and the stress of life. But I'll keep writing anyway. I will buy numerous screenwriting books and read them all and know that this next script is finally gonna be the ticket. It won't be. I will enter a competition nobody's heard of and place. I know it doesn't matter in the big picture but it feels great. So I keep writing. I finally query a manager who asks to read the script. He passes. I am bummed but at least something happened. Another manager, another read and a meeting this time! A real meeting! Would I like a water? Why, yes I would! Shampoo, rinse, repeat.

I fast forward, six or eight scripts in and I get a manager! A real one! From LA! One with a reputation! I am very excited, I made it over the moat! I'm in, guys! They like me, they really like me! The script "went out" and got some "fans" but no sale. Whiskey tango foxtrot! I'm somewhere between disappointed, bitter and a little wiser. Ahhhh, expectations, they must be managed. I tell myself this is normal. And as I look around at others in my position, I see that it is. AHA - this is the journey! I keep writing.

Every script I write gets better than the last. I look at the first script I ever wrote and I cringe. I can't believe I thought that would get me repped. I take classes. I live my life. I go to screenwriting events. I make lots of friends who are writers. I keep writing. I grow more circumspect. I stop focusing on getting repped and sold and I start focusing on writing a great script. And now I am finally at the place where something might - might - happen for me. And I keep writing. And I get repped yet again. And I get real meetings. Then nothing happens. But I'm not that upset by this - I take this as a challenge and I keep writing. And I write a script with a partner that gets me high level studio meetings and I'm picturing my island and nothing happens. I keep networking and I keep writing and I gain a reputation as a good writer who is "good in a room." One of my scripts gets a very successful producer attached. He takes the script to DreamWorks. And I wait. And I hope. But I know I won't be crushed if it doesn't happen because I've been down this road and I've grown as a writer and I know that this is a solid script and that I've got more like that in me.

I'm no longer picturing a private island but rather a decent paycheck and an open door for more meetings. I've come to relax into the journey. And I look back at the ridiculously high expectations of my earlier days and I wince - but I realize that this is the journey of a writer. It's like having a child - you can't know how hard it is or you'd never do it. You have to start out with high expectations and ideals. You can't know how circuitous this journey is going to be, or how long.

And that is the wisdom I have to pass along to you on this fine Monday, Wavers. I can't tell you to manage your expectations - you still think the journey I have been on will not apply to you. Oh, you won't admit it, of course. But deep in your heart, you think your path will be much, much shorter. That's okay. I felt the same way. You can't go around it, you have to go through it. Your path will be unique but it will have similar signposts. You might have three ineffective managers. You might have five. You might grab the brass ring on script number four and manager number two. But you can't know that - all you can do is hang onto that determination and not be swayed. As long as you keep writing and keep improving (that's key) your path will continue to unfold before you. Just keep swimming, as the Ellen DeGeneres fish said in NEMO. You know, whatever her name was. Just keep swimming. And now that tune is stuck in your head. You're welcome.

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Hollywood Calendar: 2009

Show business has its own peculiar rhythm. Whereas the mainstream American culture revolves around holidays like Christmas, New Years, Labor Day, winter/summer, the beginning of the school year, Hollywood revolves around film festivals, award shows, pilot season, fiscal end-of-year for production companies, Jewish High Holidays and Thanksgiv-chris-newyear-athon.

Is there a specific time when spec scripts are best to go out? Well, like everything in Hollywood, yes and no. It's like some playful god designed Hollywood with rules that are upside down, backwards and ever-changing, just to mess with us mortals, isn't it? If I had to warrant an opinion as to when spec season is at its best, I'd say it's sometime between mid-January through July.

Many production companies have a fiscal year that ends in October. That means in general, that by July or August, they're out of money to buy anything new. But then from Thanksgiving through the first of the year, when business is famously slow because of the holidays, nobody's buying much anyway. Anybody who's anybody is off skiing in Vail or snorkeling in Maui.

On the one hand, as I mentioned recently, during the slower winter holidays is when today's assistant/tomorrow's executive is manning the desk and that person might be more open to reading a new script. So I'm not counseling not to send in material this time of year. But be aware that this town is awful quiet from Thanksgiving through the New Year. It just is.

Many agents, managers and executives also attend the various Important Film Festivals, most notably, Sundance and Cannes and are busy a week or two before and a week or two after. While the anti-semitic urban myth that Hollywood is dominated by Jews is despicable, there is a fair Jewish population in Los Angeles and who work in the industry and the High Holidays which arrive in September/October each year do slow things down because so many do go to temple services and are otherwise engaged in solemn festivities. Not everybody. But a fair number. If you're interested in phoning up or setting up a meeting in Hollywood, you'd be silly not to be aware of when Yom Kippur is, now wouldn't you?

So here is a calendar of events for 2009 that you might want to jot down:

THE GOLDEN GLOBES
January 11th

SUNDANCE
January 15th through 25th

ACADEMY AWARDS
February 22nd

CANNES
May 13th through 24th

TORONTO FILM FESTIVAL
September 10th through September 19th

JEWISH HIGH HOLIDAYS
(This includes Rosh Hashana, the Jewish New Year, and Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement)
September 18th through September 29th

The spec season isn't like the Kentucky Derby, heralded with big hats and a trumpet blare; it's on and off, here and there. In a way, it's easier to look at the events above and see when it's NOT a great idea to send out query letters - late in the summer when there are no events but everybody's broke and the winter holidays are closing in fast, during Sundance and during Cannes. Again, roughly from the end of January through June or so is the best time to get out there with query letters.

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