Developing Voice

A lot of new screenwriters are afraid to really let ‘er rip when they write. They’ve read all the books on screenwriting, they’ve maybe gotten beaten up a little on Triggerstreet or DoneDeal and, well, they become dogmatic, pedantic or both. The truth is a writer with a “voice” is the one that readers really notice and appreciate. This whole writing thing is supposed to be fun; yes it’s a serious business and yes it’s a difficult business but if you aren’t being entertained while you’re working on your script, chances are the reader won’t be entertained while they read it.

Of course there are many elements to hammer out that aren’t exactly a gas: premise, theme, character work, dialogue, structure and narrative, but assuming you have a fairly good grasp of those elements, you will grab your reader very quickly if your personality comes through on the pages. I have a client who wrote a fantastic horror script. But I wasn’t sure how fantastic it was on page two; I just knew that this writer was cracking me up! He just went all out and wrote the action lines in a way that reflected his South Boston roots. When we spoke of it later, he said really? I was worried that my attitude might be too much on the pages. No. Way. I loved it. That is what kept me turning the pages because it was a double-whammy; a good premise executed in a very compelling, entertaining way.

What is “voice” anyway? It’s personality. Read Shane Black for a great example of “voice”. William Goldman would be another great example. In fact, Goldman reads like a person telling you a story around a campfire. I read an unproduced script by Goldman a few months ago in which he said (to paraphrase slightly) that the mayor of Los Angeles “…turns around and IT’S WILFORD BRIMLELY! No, it’s not. But it looks like him.” I mean, that was just so golden. We get it, we laugh and we move on. Clever, funny, entertaining. Above and beyond the story itself. Again, paraphrased, Shane Black in LETHAL WEAPON describes a fight scene thusly: “I basically pulverized him.” Again, funny, entertaining and most importantly, we get it.

When writers try to keep it serious and technical the material begins to feel sodden. And for a weary reader, already frankly exhausted, the affect is sleep-inducing. Scripts are blueprints, yes. But a script also exists in and of itself. I remember a young girl in a writing program I was in for a couple of years. She was writing a very complicated science-fiction drama. During class, we would sometimes read pages aloud for feedback. She would sit there and read her pages in a monotone and we’d all grow completely glassy-eyed and slowly slump lower and lower until she was done. There followed a bored silence. The thing was – interesting things were happening on the page, but the execution on the page was so deadly dull nobody cared. I’ve never heard a chase scene executed in a duller way, honestly. It doesn’t have to be that way. In fact – it better not be that way. In my experience, nothing gives away a newbie faster than dull pages.

But – can you go too far in the other direction? Yes. That I have seen too. Sometimes a writer will use the same jokey tone that they might share with their friends. The pages feel very “insidey” and har har. And worse – the talent level and material simply don’t warrant a smart-alec tone. That’s when you’re just about sunk as far as the reader is concerned. The more experienced you are, the more naturally your own “voice” seeps into the material effortlessly and organically. It becomes a matter of course.

I recommend writing your first couple of drafts in a fairly straight up manner. At this point you are working on nailing your premise and structure. As the drafts progress, then you can start to loosen up and imbue the pages with your personality. Let your attitude toward the characters and situations show. Until scripts can be generated by computers – and that day may come – all we have at our disposal is human beings or as we like to call them in the business – writers. Show the reader that no one else could have written this story but you. It is your voice that is going to make this story special. There’s a good reason for this. When you’re up for an assignment? The executive is going to review the notes on any other material you may have submitted in the past. Say the exec is looking for a writer to rewrite a horror script. The exec will thumb through the files and he will see writers who had a very elegant, understated, serious voice. He will see writers who had a very playful, intense voice. He will see writers who had a very gruesome, graphic, scary voice. He will not see, among the writers to choose from, the guy whose writing was just okay. You simply won’t be on the radar.

Readers are using a magnifying glass while we examine your script, true enough. But don’t forget – we’re people too. And we like to laugh. Or be horrified or scared. I’ve cried reading scripts because the writer just let loose and went to the poignant place and imbued the script with such feeling. You’re reading scripts all day. You’re pooped. Which would you rather read: the mayor turns and he’s older with gray hair, a friendly face and a pot belly. Or he “…turns around and IT’S WILFORD BRIMLELY! See, now you’ve made me laugh. And I want more.

This business we’re in is called the entertainment industry. So entertain the reader* and you’re ten steps ahead.

*Moms and friends excluded.

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