This I Believe

So I was listening to NPR the other day, as I am wont to do, and I heard the very last installment of their This I Believe series. It was Muhammad Ali talking about what he believes about life. It was fascinating. And I thought - how interesting, making a statement about what you believe is like writing a mission statement, isn't it? And a mission statement is a bit like a great logline isn't it? It's a very core, fundamental statement about your script.

Long time Wavers know I tend to harp on the fact that screenwriting is only one kind of writing and that you should develop the muscles and the skills to write for other mediums. Short fiction, poetry, non-fiction, first person essays - well, how about we get a two-fer today?

How about Wavers write a 100-word This I Believe Statement and submit it to the comments section here? It's a way to think about and focus on your core values and beliefs but with a strict word limit. The word limit - just like in writing a great logline - forces you to distill your thoughts into the most powerful expression possible. And here's the two-fer part - as you do this, you'll revisit and reinforce what your core values and beliefs are. In a busy, busy world we don't check in with ourselves often enough and ground ourselves in what we really believe to be true of ourselves and this life. There's just so much noise and distraction. But if we don't check in with why we're here on this planet, then we're chucking the guidebook out the window.

Easter celebrates the resurrection of Christ, but as a metaphor, it celebrates the possibilities of rebirth and new paradigms. Passover celebrates freedom from adversity and new beginnings. So it seems appropriate on this Easter and Passover holiday to take a moment to do an uplifting writing exercise that reinforces who we really are and what we hold dear.

So here's my This I Believe:

I believe that happiness is not about stuff or achievements, but a feeling of well-being. I believe that knowing the universe is fundamentally good is the only thing you need to know for sure. I believe there are no mistakes, accidents or wrongs that won’t unfold into grace down the road. I believe that grace is where courage, wisdom and laughter meet. I believe in being nice to people. I believe in playing more and worrying less. I believe we are the writers, directors and producers of our lives and that we tell the story we want to be in.

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Secret to Your Success REVEALED

Flip through your most recent copy of Creative Screenwriting or Script Magazine and focus on the ads. Yeah - that's mine, very good, thank you. Nice artwork, I know.

Look, I'm a writer just like you. And I just saw an ad for a very cool looking writer's retreat - I've never been to one and they appeal to me mightily. I have a lifelong dream of going to Yaddo or enrolling in the Iowa Writers' Workshop. Maybe one day. A retreat strikes me as a great use of money and time. Because the rewards have legs. Teach a man to fish and all that.

But some of the other ads, the ones that promise to reveal some SECRET to success - those make me so uncomfortable. Because, Wavers, there is no big secret that someone can teach you that will magically make a sale for you. There. Just. Isn't. Believe it.

With the economy in a tailspin, we are all forced to make tough decisions and really look at our expenses and test each one for how much it is really needed. In times past, we all had more disposable income and it was easy and fun to go to Target and spend $200 on stuff and we didn't think twice. We need stuff, right? Take a look at your home - look at all your stuff. I bet you have a lot. I do.

And just like anyone else, I get the feeling that some new stuff will bring happiness, security, success - whatever. When I was married, I was a shopper. Because shopping alleviated boredom and stuff feathered my nest with - well, stuff. Looking back now I see that I had been the ideal consumer - stuff makes you happy! You NEED this Pottery Barn furniture because then you'll be just like the photograph of a stuff-filled home which connotes comfort, success and classiness! Oh, and relevancy and happiness! Oh, how ridiculous. Do you know that temporary high of getting something new? Your new car, new clothes, new iPhone - it's like a new toy and it provides entertainment - for awhile. Then it's just more stuff you have. And you're no happier. Or more successful. What a line of baloney we've all been fed.

We live in a consumer driven culture and yes, there is a lot of stuff that does enrich, educate and fulfill us. But you have to check in with yourself - am I getting this stuff because I'm bored? Am I getting this stuff because it promises me that I'll be happier? Or more successful? But - will it really? Honestly?

Don't get me wrong; I'm all about seeking out joy and fulfillment. But when particular products or services tell screenwriters that they will learn some huge SECRET that will OPEN THE DOORS TO HOLLYWOOD I get kind of uncomfortable.

Because, and I'll say it again - there is no big secret that everybody knows that you do not.

Wait - no - there is. I'm charging $53.99 per view of this big secret:

Ass in chair.

Okay, you can send payments to: bigsecret@thescriptdepartment.com. Go ahead. Operators are standing by.

As a service provider for aspiring screenwriters, I obviously believe that objective feedback is an important part of your development - otherwise you can write all you want and have no idea if you're improving. If I didn't truly believe that, if I hadn't benefited from it myself, if I didn't see the impact great feedback has on writers, I wouldn't be able to sleep at night. Because I was born with a very strong ethical-ometer [technical term --Ed.] and I can't earn my living providing a service that writers don't actually need and also live with myself. I'm just not built that way. From time to time the board of directors of my company considers, then scraps, ideas that would earn us money but not really benefit you demonstrably. We just don't roll that way.

There are consumer junkies of every stripe. The techno-gadget junkies. The home furnishings and lifestyle junkies. The cosmetics and beauty supplies junkies. The DVD-buying entertainment system junkies. You name it. And for each type there is a whole industry set up to exploit the junkie and give him or her that HIGH of hope and safety and security.

Most screenwriters are pretty astute, but there are junkies in that world too. I have seen them browsing the tradeshows, snatching up armloads of books and software. I have seen them attend not one but three and four pitch fests each year. I have seen them attend not one but EVERY class and seminar. In a weird way, it's a great way to avoid actually writing. If you keep buying STUFF about screenwriting - somehow, by accretion, magically, your writing will improve.

R-i-g-h-t.

Look, I'm as guilty as some of you are - talking about screenwriting is way more fun than doing it. We'll do anything to avoid the terrifying quiet of sitting in front of our computers sometimes. And I really do get that.

But don't get taken for a fool. Big secret = bullshit.

I mean, look - of course you need to spend money on your screenwriting career. You do need to attend events, go to classes, buy some books and get feedback. It's all part of that five a day for writers I've spoken of before:

Write
Promote
Network
Learn
Live well

Check in with yourself before spending money on seminars, books and products. Is there a feeling there for you of desperation? Of a quick fix? If so - do NOT press "pay now." Be careful of where you spend your money and your time when it comes to screenwriting. New, better, faster and more is a myth. Ass. In chair. That's the only big secret. And even then, folks, even then, the odds are against you. Are you okay with that? You have to be.

Someone asked me the other day why I write The Rouge Wave. I thought about it for a minute. Because writing is really hard and isolating and I try to motivate you with humor and understanding. Because you need a cheerleader, a friend and a strict schoolmarm. Because sometimes you need to get over yourselves. Because somebody needs to tell the truth once in awhile. Because I want you to believe in yourselves. Honestly, I am YOUR fan, Wavers. I thank YOU for reading every day. Because writing is hard. But you're doing it against crazy odds. Because you can't help it. Because you have a story to tell. And because you want to express yourselves and make some sense in this crazy world. That is heroism. You are the ones who inspire me.

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Can You Hold My Attention?

I wouldn't describe myself as a script reader these days. Readers read two to three scripts per day. Now that I run a company that hires readers, I might read one or two scripts a week. And when I do, I really look forward to it. Oh for a quiet hour or so to sit with your script, turning the pages and getting lost in the world that you created. I get all comfy with some coffee or tea, turn down the radio and open the script.

I read a few pages. The phone rings. I ignore it and keep reading. My email chimes. Three times. I glance up to see what's up but return to the reading. The phone rings again; it's the director of the Attic Theater about tonight's table read - I gotta take it. After a 10 minute conversation, I return to your script - which page was I on? Oh, page 17, okay. I continue reading. Email keeps chiming. Oh shoot, that email has to be responded to right NOW. I jot off a quick reply. Now. Back to your script. What was happening? Where was I? And so on and so forth. There is no such thing as totally quiet, dedicated script reading time. It will get interrupted. And I'm just me - imagine an agent or manager reading your script. Multiply the phone calls and emails and knocks on the door by 1000.

But something strange happens when your script is engrossing. Suddenly, everything else around me goes quiet - I can't tear myself away from the pages. Yeah, yeah, I'll return that phone call but I just gotta see what happens, I'm just so swept up in these pages. Yesterday in the late afternoon that happened. I had to GO, I had a table read to host. But the script was really engaging me and I had to finish it. I kept glancing at the clock - gotta go - gotta go - but just two more pages. Just five more pages. Gotta finish this, gotta see how it ends...

On the other hand, and I'm sorry to say, this is the majority of the time, if your script is executed poorly - if I'm just not getting into the characters, if there are errors on the pages, if the storytelling itself is pedantic and unexciting, then the email chimes, phone calls and lunch dates suddenly become more pressing than your pages.

So Wavers, this is what you're up against. Because my situation is pretty normal. Even a script reader who does this as a full time job gets hungry for lunch, gets emails, phone calls and roommates poking their head in the door asking whose turn it is to vacuum. Nobody reads your script in a 100% ideal situation - i.e. uninterrupted, blissful silence.

So how can you overcome that fact? You need cinematic writing that moves. You need unforgettable characters. You need a premise that is unique and exciting. Those are the scripts that make the phone calls and other interruptions fade into the background. You can have whatever opinion you want about BALLS OUT, the Robotard Mystery Script, but it is, if nothing else, very engaging. It MOVES. It surprises, it offends and it makes you laugh. It is, in a word, engaging.

Engaging the reader. That's your job.

The first thing to overcome for you, the writer, is the difference between what engages YOU and what will engage and involve someone else. If you asked 10 writers whether their script is engaging, all 10 would say yes it is. Nobody ever tries to write a script that isn't. Right?

But the relationship between a writer and his or her script is inherently incestuous. You're too close to the material to imagine that it may not be as great to someone else as it is to you. You've read it and worked on it ad infinitum, so you have no perspective anymore. Is it entertaining? Well, sure, to YOU it is.

But is it really? Is it interruption proof? Will it make a professional reading your script ignore the ringing phone and be late for lunch?

That would make a great rating on the rating grid - engaging/entertaining/compelling. Fair, Good or Excellent. Maybe we should think about including that at The Script Department. Mama shall think that one over. But do you really want to hear the answer?

The most heartbreaking instance is when a script is executed just fine - no typos, clean action lines, a good page length - but the story is just, well, dull. It's fine. It's okay. It's just not that interesting.

Many of you may read scripts from time to time and you're thinking - hey! I stick to it! I don't get interrupted, my attention is held the whole time. Well, there's a wide gulf between you and a professional reader. For one thing, you are probably reading a professionally written and/or produced script in which the writer has a very high skill set. Or barring that, you're reading a script as a favor to someone and you're all amped up to do it. And another thing - you might read two or three scripts a month. Try reading two or three scripts a DAY and imagine then, that of the minimally 15 scripts you read in a week, that 13 made your eyes bleed.

Reading can sometimes be a real grind. Believe it. And your script enters into that grind as a new, fresh hope for that reader. Maybe THIS one will be a quick read. Maybe THIS one will crack me up or scare me or make me cry. Maybe THIS one will remind me how much I love good writing.

That's why readers get SO excited when your script rocks. Wow! One stood out! This writer changed my perspective, just a little bit. This writer entertained me, moved me and delighted me. God I love that feeling. It's the best feeling in the world. Well, you know, in the top 10.

Imagine this: You pick up a book and read a few pages. Not turning you on. You give it another few pages. Still not doing anything for you. You flip ahead. Eh. You look at the cover again. Meh. You read the author's bio on the back. Hmm. And you make the painful decision to put the book down. If you're a reader, you don't have that latitude. You MUST read the whole damn thing. And then write up your thoughts about it. If it was slow, unoriginal, laborious and filled with typos and mistakes, your coverage is going to reflect that without mercy.

So remember, after you've read all of your Save the Cats and Storys and Writing Great Character Blah-Blah books, after you've read The Rouge Wave everyday, the onus is still on you to write pages that engage and entertain. Your job is to write pages and tell a story that engages the reader. Your pages have to make the world go away.

There's no book that can tell you how to do that. It's called talent. And it's making sure that your premise - before you write the bloody script - is an interesting, original, entertaining one. Feedback helps. Being honest with yourself helps. So often newer writers can be very self-indulgent. How can the thinly veiled autobiographical story of how hard it was for you to find love when you were a student at UC San Diego not be TOTALLY exciting to someone else? Hint: It won't be.

Readers are jaded. J-a-d-e-d. We have already read every script known to man. The same stories are told over and over. What you think is totally original, to us is a script we read last week. Believe it. I know it's a very harsh truth. Your totally original sci-fi script? Yeah,I've read it before and it was better.

Awful awful awful, right? Well, it's the truth.

Get honest feedback from someone who either doesn't know you or someone willing to be 100% honest. So that rules out your mom, spouse and friends. Work HARD on hammering out a premise that is the same - but different. Dig down deep into the particularity of the world you are creating. Take the time to develop characters that really are unique. Write pages that move quickly and that are cinematic, colorful and entertaining.

Because the entertainment factor is everything. It is simply everything. And the golden pathway to that ineffable quality of engaging and entertaining is paved by everything above and then the one, magical ingredient that rules them all: VOICE.

How do you develop your voice? By writing. A lot. By letting go some and having fun on the pages. By being a little playful. By being unafraid to be uniquely you.

Generally, new writers go through several phases:

The first, horrible, awful two to three scripts: You have read all the books, taken all the classes and your writing is pedantic, tight and unoriginal. You get shut down immediately when you try to query or enter a competition. People smile thinly at you and encourage you to "keep trying!"

The mediocre three to four scripts after that: You don't have to refer to your Trottier book 18 times a day anymore to check on how to deal with structure. But your premises are not unique or entertaining. Your scripts are o-k-a-y but dull. You get shut down wherever you query. Your writing group encourages you but nobody really believes you have that "it" factor. You're a statistic: one of millions of aspiring screenwriters all over the world trying to break in and failing.

The mediocre and derivative couple of scripts after that: Now you're getting mad. What the hell?! Why is this not coming together?! You get shut down again. But you aren't quitting. WHERE is the golden premise that will enable you to write a great script? You've learned all there is to learn (you think), you write every day, your pages are pretty good but success still eludes you.

Then it happens. You say okay you know what? Screw it. I'm going to write this crazy story and I don't care what anyone says. I'm sick of this shit. I LOVE this story and I'm going to go nuts on it and my skill set is high but my temper is higher and I'm having fun on these pages. And that, Wavers, is the script that will break you into Hollywood.

But here's the rub: You CANNOT fast forward and write that great break-in script without going through writing several bad scripts first. It doesn't happen. Because you have to get good and frustrated first. And you HAVE to learn all that screenwriting craft stuff first. Oh, there are many who bleat - But what about Diablo Cody! She did it! And so can I! I'm just so talented! I deserve this! I need the money! I want the fame! Do not listen to the siren call of the Entitled Diva. It will dash you against the rocks.

You can't go around it, you can't go over it, you have to learn this lesson through experience.

So this script was kinda crappy. Fine. Start over and write another one. So that one was derivative and boring. FINE. Start over and write another one. And another. And another. One day you'll get good and mad - and determined - and you'll let loose. And that is the best feeling in the world for me, selfishly, because your script just made me miss my lunch date and three phone calls - and I don't care. Victory on the page!

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Robotard 8000 REVEALED

Well - THAT didn't take long. All is revealed - or is it? Read all HERE. In the meantime I have received an email from the Robotard thanking me for my interest. This intrepid mystery writer or writers has got a Google Alert, it would seem. What a funny little mystery.

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The Robotard 8000

About a week or 10 days ago, I found the Robotard 8000 online. At first, I thought it was a joke. But the reviews of this script are by some pretty well known people. The site streaked around the intertubes with comments like - Have you SEEN this? Is this for real? ROFL what is this??

Is it a hoax? Is it a stunt? Is this by some unknown writer from Nebraska, desperate for attention? And if so - is this a genius move or is it the move of a, well, robotard?

I am told that this script is actually written by an A-lister associated with Will Ferrell. I have also been told this script was written by a collective of A-listers. I don't think anybody knows for sure but I'll tell you this - the script is hilarious. Not the most brilliant script I've ever read but what I like about it is that it is totally in keeping with the title of the script - BALLS OUT. Any script that starts with "fade the f*ck in" has my attention. The script is playful and ridiculous and offensive. And it's a quick, funny read.

Publicity stunt by a collective of A-listers or a hoax, you really should read the script for a sense of what "having fun on the page" looks like. The premise may not be the most original, but it's evident on page one and every page thereafter. The action lines are pithy, yes there are a few typos here and there, but it moves quickly and it's just so entertaining that you can't put it down. I read the first 30 pages while I was supposed to be doing something else. I just couldn't stop.

And that, Wavers, is how you want people to feel about your script. They just can't put it down.

So for a quick, fun, totally offensive read, stop by the Robotard 8000 and check out the script. The loglines on the very last page are the comedy topper of toppers.

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Somebody Got There First

Well. It finally happened. You read the trades and you see it. A script that has sold that is exactly like the script you have been working on for months. Even the title is similar. Sure, sure, some of the details are different but the premise - yeah, that was your premise. And now it's out there and you're done for. Right?

Well, not exactly. Look, this is not a good situation, there's no two ways about it. If someone just SOLD a script that shares the same basic idea as yours, well, that puts you in a pretty disadvantageous position if you are a totally unknown, unrepped writer. Not quite as disadvantageous if you're repped and a known entity. Sometimes movies are released in twos: PAUL BLART and OBSERVE AND REPORT are a recent example. Then of course, ARMAGEDDON and DEEP IMPACT is probably the most famous example.

But there's a big difference between you, Joe Writer from Somewhere, working on a script and Joe Hollywood Writer who just sold a similar script. There's not really going to be an arms race there to get your movie into production as well. So if that is your situation, you're pretty much screwed. And you know what? It happens. And yes, you will cry in your soup for a few days. What an awful feeling. All that hard work for nothing.

But is it for nothing? No. It is not. Complete your script. Make it the best iteration of your take on the premise as possible. Why? Because you now have a great sample. And yes, when and if you get meetings, your script will be compared to the script that was sold - but that's okay. You are aware of that and this is a sample. To not be aware would be the biggest sin, honestly. But you're not going to query using this script. It's going to be in your kit bag as a sample. That's really the only big shift that's going to happen for you. This script is not going to the point of the spear for you. But in the big picture, while that's disappointing - well, let's be honest, it's really a blow - you still have other scripts in your arsenal.

And an arsenal is what you need to have. I know how exciting it feels to finish a script and query with it. But many writers forget that you need to have others that are also in great shape as samples of your writing. Ideally, you should have two or more really great scripts aside from the one you are querying with.

So if you find that a script quite similar to yours is out on the marketplace, just sold or even released in theaters, give yourself a minute to feel the burn of that. It's natural. But do not give up on that script. Focus on your craft and voice and screenwriting skills. Make your script the best mall cop script you personally could write. And then add it to your stack of samples. Then move on to a new script, one that you do trust is totally unique...and start again.

There's no way to prevent this situation from arising. We writers are all out there reading the newspaper and brainstorming and observing life and so it's only a matter of time before someone else has an idea similar to your own. And that writer might execute the script faster, they might be repped or lucky or an alien life form - and they get their script on the market first. So while I hope this never happens to you, if it does, stay calm, hang onto your script and make sure it is a GREAT draft because when you get into a meeting in which a rep is seriously entertaining taking you on, it is still part of your body of work. Not knowing that there is a script or movie like yours already out there - now that would be embarrassing. So do read the trades and stay up on script sales.

Here are some resources for following what's selling:

Done Deal Pro
Tracking B

-and the highly entertaining Script Girl.

So if you have been the victim of Somebody Got There First, breathe it out and do not give up on your script. You need great samples and though the issue was forced, this is a great sample. Never miss an opportunity to learn while you are on this journey. Never write a half-assed script and then let it languish in a drawer. Every script you write is potentially a great sample or, of course, in the best outcome possible, the script that got you repped - or even sold.

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What's New With Josh Zetumer

Good morning, Wavers! And did everybody have a nice weekend? As the deadline approaches for the Silver Screenwriting Competition (May 1, mark it on your calendar!), Margaux Froley thought it would be a great time to get an update with Josh Zetumer. Josh will be dining with the Grand Prize winner this year, in case you forgot. So here's the latest:

***

It's been nearly a year since our last interview with Josh. He's been hard at work finishing DUNE and even had time to do rewrite work on Guy Ritchie's SHERLOCK HOLMES. Suffice it to say, Josh is still a "working screenwriter," and I might even venture to say he's one of those coveted Hollywood A-list writers. Despite his demanding schedule, Josh has agreed to have lunch with the Grand Prize winner of the Silver Screenwriting contest and answer a few questions for you Rouge Wavers.

Josh, last time we spoke you had just gotten the job for DUNE. At the time you mentioned your love of sandworms. After finishing a draft on that project, how do you feel about sandworms now?

Groan.

But really, that sounded like a very tough project to crack. How did adapting DUNE compare to writing something of your own on spec?

For me, this project was infinitely harder than a spec. I get to a point on most projects where I want to quit/have a near-panic attack. I'm beginning to realize, as horrible as that is, it's all part of the creative process. It's like an acid trip; it's fun, but you know that for at least a couple hours you're going to be fearing for your life. On DUNE this was especially intense. The book is amazing, but parts read like physics homework. There's so much terminology, and so much is internal - characters second-guessing each other, trying to gauge situations. The key for me was to keep saying, "What can I do visually to express this idea?" I feel like this is a pretty important question you should be asking yourself on every screenplay. Show not tell.

As to the sandworms, yeah I still love them. What's not to love? I'm just hoping they look cool onscreen.

You mentioned that you did some rewrite work on SHERLOCK HOLMES. How much prior SHERLOCK knowledge did you have going into that? What did you to do prepare for something like that?

I'd been a fan of the stories, but I definitely needed a refresher course. The crazy thing about some of these production rewrites (jobs where you're rewriting the script just before or during filming) is that you usually have a matter of hours, not days, to decide if you're taking the job. Then suddenly you're on the clock, and that can be scary. On SHERLOCK I bought a book of short stories and was literally reading on the plane on the way to meet the producers. Doing research is normally one of my favorite parts of the process, but in this case there just wasn't time. The nice thing was that Robert Downey Jr. had such a clear view of the character, it was easy to dive right in.

Sorry, I have to ask. How was Robert Downey, Jr. to work with?

I know this is the stock answer to the "What was so-and-so like to work with," but in this case it's 100% true: He's incredible. Completely deserving of his celebrity. Hanging out with Robert is kind of like going to the carnival; you just follow him around, trying to write frantically while he drops one crazy/brilliant aphorism after another. The only thing is, he's so charismatic and witty that he kind of turns everyone else into a satellite. You become Downey-adjacent. I think if I hung out with him on a regular basis I would develop serious self-esteem issues. I am not now, nor will I ever be, as cool as Robert Downey, Jr.

You have been steadily getting assignments in Hollywood for a few years now...even with your established track record, how do you feel about getting the next job?

Um...cautiously optimistic? Two years ago I probably would have said "terrified." Like take-a-klonopin-and-go-to-sleep-shivering scared. I think generally my anxiety about work has become more manageable, but it still definitely lingers. You work so hard to get anywhere, and then the moment anything positive happens the first thing you tell yourself is, "This will not last. This is all going to be taken away." It doesn't help when you talk to older screenwriters and all they tell you is, "Enjoy it while you can, kid." Seriously, any writer who's spent more than 10 years in Hollywood turns into the grim f*cking reaper.

How important has your relationship with your representation (agent and manager) been in starting and then maintaining your career?

The most important thing in the world. If I could give only one piece of advice to first-time screenwriters it would be: Don't write a script to sell it, write it to land an agent. Agents and managers read 10 to 15 scripts a weekend, three of them on the treadmill. So write a script that's fun to read, that shows a distinct and confident voice, but don't try to second-guess the marketplace. You can kill yourself following trends and trying to predict what will sell. A lot of people also ask, "Why do you need both an agent and manager?" This may not be true for everyone, but in my experience, having both has been invaluable. A manager can produce, and that can be helpful landing gigs. My first studio job - writing a movie called THE INFILTRATOR for Leonardo Dicaprio - was something my manager was producing. Managers and agents also have incentive to set you up with their director clients, so that can be very helpful as well.

If I were an unrepresented screenwriter with a terrific spec, what do you think my best options would be for launching my career?

First move to Los Angeles. It's hard enough to get anyone to notice you in Hollywood. It's even harder if you're living in Maine. Some people do the query letter thing - sending unsolicited scripts to agents - but I don't know any instances of this actually working (that's not to say it can't happen, it just seems like a longshot). A big part of being a screenwriter is hustling, selling yourself. You need to be very proactive. Enter as many screenwriting contests as you can. Read blogs. Try to meet people who are connected to talent agencies. All it really takes to get the ball rolling is one person who believes in you. This can be an indie producer, a writer who has an agent, etc. In my case it was two guys: a writer named Chris McKenna who gave my spec to his agent, and an assistant named Mark Tuohy who gave the script to his boss, a packaging agent. I went to high school with Chris, and Mark I met through an old girlfriend, so you never know where these connections will come from. It's either that or get creative. Become a valet, find out where Steven Spielberg eats lunch, and leave your spec on the passenger seat. Actually, I'm sure he gets that all the time.

Thank you, Josh. Is - is that a sandworm??

Ha.

All righty, Wavers. Get back to work. And don't forget, May 1st looms, so get those scripts in and you just might be the person asking Josh about life in the fast lane.

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Can't Get No Rep

Dear Rouge Wave,

What are your thoughts on the old catch-22, can’t get a representative but production companies/studios/networks only accept material submitted through a rep? Like so many others, I’ve thought about (and, yes, tried) going the “straight to a production company route.” However, I often run into that wall. I try to target the production companies that have produced or have in production/development similar projects to mine. What’s your suggestion for this type of situation?

-Frustrated in Florida

Dear Frustrated,

This is indeed a frustrating situation. Many production companies will not accept unsolicited scripts, much less those from unrepped writers. But there are some that do. You have to do your research and look up the submission requirements of the production company you are targeting. If you can't see the information you need in the HCD (Hollywood Creative Directory) then you can pick up the phone and politely ask.

The tricky thing about this business is that there are accepted ways of doing things - the norm - but for every norm there are exceptions. So it's hard to know what to do or what to believe. See, here's the thing: Production companies have some pretty good reasons for not accepting unrepped work. A repped writer has been vetted, for one thing. Production companies would rather know the work is on the level where a manager or agent really believes in it. It's a filtering system. It's quality control. And it's very necessary. You seriously would not believe how many scripts arrive in Hollywood every day - and many are unsolicited. And they go straight into the circular file. Production companies are inundated with new material and are of course busy developing the material that they already have. They don't have time to sort through unrepped, unsolicited material to make sure it's a fit for their company and they may not even be looking for new material at the time anyway. A rep only submits to a production company if that rep has a sense that the material might be a fit for the company's mandate, tastes and current needs. An unsolicited, unrepped script may be totally, 100% inappropriate but worse - here's the thing I have been avoiding saying so far - if it's not repped, the chances that it's any good are slim.

All of the big, busy production companies are going to operate with a filter in place. A hardcore filter. No rep - no read. Period.

There are some smaller companies that might respond to a killer query and ask to read your script - you just have to find them.

But let's return to the tough truth I hesitated to say upfront: If it's not repped, the chances that it's any good are slim. Ouch. But unfortunately, Frustrated, this is the truth. Getting rep is phenomenally hard, especially these days. And yes, of course there are writers who should be repped but they just haven't been read by an agent or manager who really clicked with their material or voice. Those writers get reads and get meetings with the agent or manager they targeted but wind up not clicking and have to keep trying. That's how you can tell if you're getting closer and closer - people respond to your work but they aren't quite ready to climb onboard with you.

But. If you have been trying to get rep for awhile now, unsuccessfully, you need to stop and ask yourself why that is.

Have you been querying reps with the same script for some time? Or with various scripts? What is the rate of read requests on your query? Is it time to review your query? If you DO get read, you're obviously getting a lot of of "passes" - well, how many "passes" are you getting? It could be that it's not the reps - it's you. You may just not be ready to be repped. Your writing might not be rating high enough on the professional, creative and unique Richter scale. In other words, that it's tough to get repped is not as much a reflection of this very tough industry, it's a reflection of the fact that your writing is not comparable to those writers who are repped. In other words, your material just isn't strong enough to warrant representation.

Now: This may not be true of you or your material, Frustrated, but if you've been trying for awhile, you need to read the writing on the wall and return to improving your work...generating new ideas, writing fresh scripts and working your behind off on improving your craft. Going AROUND rep by going directly to production companies works for some people but for others it is a rationalization. Stupid reps! I'll just go straight to buyers! Well - are you picking up what I'm laying down here?

Going straight to a buyer can work - again, the infuriating thing about this business is that while what I am saying here is all eminently true, there are rare stories of people who do successfully sell a piece of material and circumvent the normal routes. But really, those are rare stories and think about this: Do you want a one-off sale to a production company so small and so open that they basically have no quality control - or do you want a real career? A real career requires a rep. It just does.

So yes, you can go straight to prodcos but in a way, you are circumventing a reality: Your writing will not blossom into a real career without a rep. And a rep will not take on a writer not ready for that career. So that's the real catch-22, not how to go around the built-in quality control.

I hate to sound negative - in fact, I loathe it - but lately I have been hearing from a lot of aspiring writers who seem to feel that they are entitled to representation. Unfortunately, they lack the perspective of one who does read repped and sold work and, well, aspiring writers often overestimate the quality of their writing. There's only one real litmus test: not if your friends like the script, not if your writing group likes the script, but if a real, working entertainment professional does. It only takes one "yes," right? But if all you are getting is "no" then it's not Hollywood, it's you. Which is a very bitter pill to swallow. Well, wait, you say - that doesn't make sense - if it only takes one "yes" then I'll just keep at it until I find that "yes" like a needle in a haystack! I'll be that story! That story of determination! Everybody said no until I found this ONE rep who believed in me!

It's about calculating odds. Every "no" makes that "yes" a rarer thing. Okay, you're at the prom in your pretty dress. Nobody has asked you to dance. Not one person. It's not YOU, it's THEM, they are a bunch of jerks. How long do you stand there feeling totally rejected before you take a look down at the dress and notice that it's got a punch stain on it and a tear in the hem? Ohhhhhh. It is you. I mean, hey, you might find that ONE dude who doesn't mind a punch stain and a torn hem - but is that the dude you want to dance with? Okay in a romantic comedy, sure, that's probably the guy for you because he looks past appearances. But in Hollywood, you want a rep who LOVES your work so much that he or she is willing to bank a career on it. And on a dance floor full of pretty girls, the bar is pretty high. Don't underestimate that, Frustrated. There are a lot of great, repped writers out there. Hollywood is full of them. So as the new girl on the dance floor, you have to compete with that. So you can stand there with your torn hem and punch stain and wait for just the right guy, the guy with lower standards, or you can go home, clean up that dress and come back to the dance ready to lay down some moves.

Remember, it's not how many "nos" you get, it's how you then restrategize and handle that. For now, you are your own business manager. X tactic is not working. Okay, so what is needed, here? Maybe you are four more completed scripts away from really nailing it and telling a great story in an engaging way. Maybe you are one script away from that. Maybe the script you are querying just isn't going to go anywhere, ever. Sooner or later, you must take honest stock of the situation.

Yes there are production companies that will read unsolicited, unrepped work. And I don't mean to cast aspersions on them; there are new, small prodcos really casting wide for material and they are eager and able to wade through the stacks. Just do your homework and find out who they are. Get an HCD and get on the phone.

But you lead off your question by saying it's hard to get rep, which makes me wonder if you're ready for rep - and if you're not - chances are you're probably also not ready to be sold - to anyone. Take a look at your material - is it really competitive in this market? It's hard to know the truth of that and the only barometer is the reaction you get out on the dance floor, as flawed as that system may be - it's the only real measure.

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Catching Up With Hilary Graham

Good morning, Wavers! The other day, Margaux Froley interviewed Hilary Graham, last year's Silver Screenwriting Grand Prize winner, to find out what she's up to almost one year later. Sounds like she's been pretty busy. But don't take my word for it, let's hear from Hilary:

Hilary, it's been six months since your Grand Prize trip to Los Angeles. How has your approach to your career shifted since then?

Well, being a writer from New Hampshire, I think it’s critical to go to LA every few months and get an infusion of that energy. Plus, it gives me an excuse to wear lipstick. There’s a line from ALMOST FAMOUS that Kate Hudson and her friends keep repeating throughout the film: "It’s all happening..." I feel like that when I’m in LA, and it’s a great motivating factor. One thing I left LA with was that I should never miss an opportunity to pitch my "take" on a project. When I got home I had three novels given to me by producers, three magazine articles, and three "concepts." I pitched my take on all of them. Yes, it was a lot of hard work, but now two of those things are percolating...

What have you been working on since?

Since October I have written two treatments, four chapters of a novel, finished a first draft of my latest spec script and developed pitches for the aforementioned novels/articles/ideas. Some of these things were better than others. ;)

You recently sold your first project...tell us about that. From coming up with the idea to check in hand.

While I was in LA, I was a busy, busy lady. You - The Script Department - set me up with a bunch of meetings, and so did my manager - Seth Jaret of Jaret Entertainment. They were general meetings, but sometimes I did pitch a few of my new ideas (I had three "polished" pitches). At one of the meetings, I did my three pitches, and one of them led to a request to see a treatment. So, I went home and quickly wrote said treatment, and now that production company is paying me to write that spec.

It sounds like you have been incredibly productive. Is this normally how fast you write or has a taste of Hollywood gotten to you?

I am by nature a hard worker, and I know that you need to work hard to get ahead in this business because everyone is hungry. I write five days a week, 9:00 – 2:00, and often for a couple hours in the evening and on weekends.

Are there any lingering lessons you are still benefiting from since your LA trip and your meetings with other working screenwriters and producers?

My two biggest lessons are to not be too hard on myself and to try not to jump to conclusions. One of the worst meetings I had (which was actually a post-LA phone call with the agent of an A-list director) was bad. Embarrassingly bad. But the production company that set up the call is now paying me to write my spec, so it just goes to show you. Also, I pitched one producer a take that he didn’t really respond to back in November, and recently, out of the blue, he called up to tell me that he changed his mind and we’re working together on a treatment.


Any advice for aspiring screenwriters?

Write as much as you can. You get better as you go.

Also, any sense about what the market is like in Hollywood for new writers breaking in?

God, I don’t really know. But I try to remain naively optimistic. I always think there’s space for fresh new voices and original ideas.

How has your representation helped you manage your blossoming career?

My manager rocks. He has access to all of the gatekeepers in Hollywood and he has relationships with these people. Plus, he has an amazing critical eye for my work, which really helps me strengthen and improve my writing. And of course, he is one of my greatest cheerleaders.

Would you encourage other writers to enter the Silver Screenwriting Competition?

I encourage every aspiring screenwriter to enter the Silver Screenwriting Competition. You WANT to win this prize. The cash was nice, sure, but that was only part of the real prize. To me, the trip to LA was really what it’s all about. Not only did they set me up in a cool little trendy hotel, but the Script Department put so much energy into making sure I was living the life of a Hollywood screenwriter — from arranging meetings to taking me to lunch at the Paramount commissary to taking me for drinks at the chi-chi Château Marmont.

At night, the Script Department set me up with drinks and dinner with three different major screenwriters: Blake Snyder (author of the SAVE THE CAT screenwriting series), Steve Faber (WEDDING CRASHERS), and David Arata (CHILDREN OF MEN). The words of wisdom offered by these experienced and talented people was just invaluable. Nothing beats having a mini-mentorship with an Academy Award nominee over some Pinot Grigio. Blake, Steve, and David each were happy to share their unique perspectives on and experiences in the business of screenwriting, giving me sage advice, and most of all encouragement. Well, Steve Faber also gave me slight heart palpitations, but in a good way. The man is a force of nature.

By day, the Script Department arranged meetings with producers, making me more than just a name on a cover page, and providing me the beginnings of a working relationship with people from a slew of well-respected production companies. And we all know how essential relationships are to this business (especially for a writer who lives on the east coast).

Since my trip, the ongoing creative support from The Script Department has been amazing. Before I won the 2008 Silver Screenwriting Contest, I used to feel like I didn’t really have a writing community, that I had no one to bounce ideas off of. Now, I have The Script Department — a team of talented, insightful WRITERS who actually have a stake in helping me achieve success and are committed to shepherding me in every aspect of this business. Talk about priceless! Clearly, this is more than just your average screenwriting contest. Enter it. Hell, enter it twice.

What's next for you?

Taking a shower. It’s almost noon and I’m still in my PJs. After that — world domination.

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Competition Criteria

Dear Rouge Wave:

Love your blog, it's a raft of rationality, creativity, and intelligence amidst a sea of screenwriting blather...

But I'm not sure if the screenwriting contest is worth entering.

Because the finalists and winners in these contest are virtually never commercially viable.

I know there are (rare) exceptions, but the scripts that do well almost always seem to be "small" family dramas, period pieces about obscure historical figures, and quirky indie dramas.
None of which will have CAA or the major studios knocking at my door.

So, my question is...Will your contest be any different? More specifically, will marketplace viability be an important criterion?

-Skeptical in Saskatoon


Dear Skeptical:

Not sure if you read the interview just a couple of days ago with Brian Schornak of Back Lot Productions. SUNSHINE CLEANING - a very quirky indie - won a competition, was produced and had a wide release. So quirky indie scripts can do very well.

The criteria for judging scripts at the Silver Screenwriting Competition are simple: We are looking for talented writers with unique voices, entertaining and original scripts executed beautifully. Ergo, a potential career that lies ahead. That is why the prize, outside of some fun things like an iPhone and MacBook Air, is a trip to LA to meet with managers and an A-list writer.

Competition-winning scripts that meet those criteria will absolutely have CAA or ICM knocking on your door. Voice and talent are the holy grail, my friend. When you say commercially viable, I'm not sure what you really mean - over and over again we see funky scripts (JUNO, LARS AND THE REAL GIRL, LITTLE MISS SUNSHINE and SUNSHINE CLEANING, to name a few) that were totally commercially viable. If we got a big action thriller at the Silver Screenwriting Competition that met the criteria I mentioned a moment ago, it would climb up the ladder very quickly and yes, would be even more attractive than a quirky drama - to some buyers. But any script that has won a competition is something that attracts agents and managers because, as Brian said in his interview, this is an automatic sorting system. Of thousands of scripts submitted, this writer has proven that he or she is in the top 1% in originality, execution and voice - regardless of the genre or "commercial viability."

If there's one thing I know for sure about Hollywood, it's that agents, managers and producers are always looking for fresh, new writers. That I can say for a fact. New writers with new voices and unique stories are HOT. Everybody wants to say they discovered you.

But screenwriting is not a sprint, it is a marathon. If you enter a competition and win (or at least place in the top five), you have just been anointed, validated and confirmed with talent. You have a script that can get you the attention you need to get meetings and get noticed. If your criteria for entering a competition is that the script should then get you immediately repped and sold - well, you might be thinking in sprint mentality. The point is to build a fan base and to get out there and noticed as a promising writer. There is no silver bullet. You still have to have the goods - ongoing.

And there's so much at play. If you go through the list of writers who have won competitions for the past five years say, and researched each one and found out which one subsequently sold that script or subsequently sold a script or subsequently was repped without selling any script and is getting open assignment work, you'd probably see a relatively small number. Why? Because now we come into some variables: Did the writer make the good decisions necessary to leverage that win into meetings? Did that writer have a body of work to back up that win? Did or does the writer live in Los Angeles and get out there to meetings? Did the writer follow up the winning script with another, even better script?

There are a lot of variables; and, like a lunar eclipse, things have to line up just so for a win to really get the writer the traction they need to build a career.

Let me say it again: There is NO silver bullet, quick fix or easy way in. A competition win is hugely validating and energizing. But it now gives the writer a new set of challenges. Can you leverage the win? Can you write something that great again? And again? Can you get into meetings and be good in a room?

Winning a competition is a great way to get your foot in the door and then kick some serious ass. It elevates you from the teeming masses - and they are teeming - make no mistake. But you're the one who has to do the ass kicking. Is there more great writing where that came from?

Winning a competition means you have just arrived at a whole new base camp as you continue to climb this mountain. But nobody but you can affect those other variables of more good scripts to back up your win and potential career. Nobody but you can be good in a room. Nobody but you can have other great ideas on deck.

Saying that competition-winning scripts are quirky, small and not "commercially viable" is definitely an inaccurate generalization. Writers who look askance at competitions with that as their reasoning are, in my view, copping out. There's no free lunch. If you have the chops to win a competition, you have to be responsible to use that experience to move on up from there. Let me say this loud and clear: Good writing is good writing. And the cream always rises to the top.

At The Silver Screenwriting Competition our goal is to reward the winning screenwriter with an opportunity to do just that. Move on up. Come on out, meet some influential people, create relationships and pitch your heart out. In addition, we follow up with all of the winning writers - where's your rewrite? How are you spending your time? Have you sent thank you notes? What are you writing now? We don't give you your prizes and walk away - we are an integral part of paving a path for you. But you have to have the goods to walk that path. And by goods I mean chops, determination, good strategic decision making and more great ideas and scripts in your old kit bag.

Whether you choose to enter The Silver Screenwriting Competition or any other competition is up to you. Is it worth it a shot? Is it worth the possibility of setting up a whole new base camp, one much closer to the peak? To me the answer is self-evident.

The deadline for the Silver Screenwriting Competition is coming up fast, by the way. May 1. So if you'd like to have a shot at taking your nascent career and turning into a real one, polish up your draft and submit ASAP.

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Failing Upward: Writing Group Blues

Dear Rouge Wave:

I recently joined a writing group here in NYC. It was a labor intensive application process - essays, writing samples, personal interview, audit session. I had some questions re: the leader in terms of his personality and how we would work together but I put them aside and went to the audit session. The other members were very nice and gave me some valuable feedback on my script. So, my problem is this: When I read their scripts, I was not impressed - at all. Now, I know I am a newbie and have a TON to learn but it was pretty clear to me that they need to learn even more. Without patting myself on the back too hard, it just seems like I am at a more advanced stage than they are and so, I'm wondering if it's worth the effort to continue. I'm kind of thinking about it like my tennis game - when I play people who are worse than me, I typically play to their level...and vice versa - if my opponent is better than me, I play better. I know I only improve my game when I play people better than me, not when I play someone worse. Do you think this applies to screenwriting? Can I really only get better by having more advanced, knowledgeable writers critique my work? So...what do you think? Is it worth it to make the effort and join the group? Oh, I should also mention that I now know for a fact that the leader will drive me nuts (controlling, arrogant, condescending), though I did like everyone else. This is my first experience with a writing group. Help!!

-Annoyed in Annapolis

Dear Annoyed:

I can see where the audition to even get IN this writing group would be a bit, well, annoying. On the other hand, you have to give this group kudos for being very careful about who they admit to the group. You say that you are not impressed and that it's clear many members of this group still have a lot to learn: Do you mean that in terms of basic craft and execution? And if so - what percentage of the group is literally writing bad pages? By bad pages I mean too much black, clumsy action lines, two-dimensional characters and wooden dialogue. Or do you mean to say that you weren't impressed because you didn't think the scripts you read were commercially viable without theme or universality?

Well - in any event, there are two ways to look at this:

Get Out Now
If you're already annoyed and having doubts, if your attitude (fair or not) is that you are a much better writer - get out and get out now. If nothing else, your attitude about this is going to poison what you contribute to this group and certainly what you'll get out of it.

Chillax, Man
A writing group really does have room in it for all sorts of skill sets. That said, it depends on how advanced you really are. You are a self-admitted newbie so we're not talking about plunking John August into this group, right? Measure the distance between yourself and your fellow group members and ask - is the distance such that I can still get valuable, insightful and intelligent feedback? And is it such that I can give valuable, insightful and intelligent feedback as well? Or will you spend time nicely explaining why the 15 page flashback (suspiciously similar to a scene in THE DARK KNIGHT) is probably not a good idea to a high school senior from Poughkeepsie? Unless the distance between you and the rest of the group is that vast, you probably have more to learn and to gain from your fellow group members than you think.

Here's what is a big drag to have in a writing group:

The Whiners: spend their allotted time complaining about how they couldn't write this week and they have to get a root canal. Or they whine about the story and how hard it is and how unfair Hollywood is.

The Long Talkers: take their turn and then 3/4 of someone else's. They are self-centered and go on for miles about the backstory of their main character and how Mamet-like their dialogue is. They bore everybody else and they do not hear comments as much as use them for mulch and a jumping off point for their next rant. When they DO give comments on your work, they go on and on til even you are bored.

The Takers: show up late and leave early. They don't attend every week. When they do, they're all about THEM. They pretend to listen to your pages and your questions but they don't care and it shows. Ambition drives them, but a self-centered attitude guarantees that if the apocalypse came during writing group, they would be the first out the door.

The Know-it-Alls: Their comments are brusque and opinionated. They don't ask questions of your material, they make statements and give directives. They leave you feeling confused and annoyed and attacked.

The Emotional Tinderbox: cries at group a lot. Always has personal drama. Takes up time talking about break-up with boyfriend and how writing sucks and Hollywood is unfair. Will seize upon something in your script, even positively, and will gush over it to an embarrassing degree.

In my opinion, Annoyed, a good writing group should have one, underlying mission statement and that is to support one another with positive feedback, thoughtful criticism and intelligent conversation, no matter where each writer is on the curve. Even a very new, not very good writer can give some great feedback. You seem to want to know what's in it for you. But you need to be thinking also about what you can bring to the table for the others. Don't be so quick to judge; you might be surprised.

That said - if your gut tells you this really isn't going to be a fit in terms of the group leader's personality (I find that alone slightly odd; writing groups I have been a member of have been fairly egalitarian) and you feel strongly that the other writers are ALL at the very beginning of the learning curve, get out while you're ahead.

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