A Day in My Life

Ah....Halloween. Day of masks and ruses. And candy. The day before the day before the carved pumpkin starts to collapse and smell weird. Five days before a historic election and two days before the time change. It's a time to reflect and to ....okay I think I've pretty much milked that dry.

So I spent yesterday finishing reading and covering a FANTASTIC novel for Seed Productions. The main character was unforgettable as he introduces himself as a thinking man, entrepreneur and murderer. I think I signed some kind of non-disclosure something or other a couple of years back when I started reading for them so I'm not supposed to talk about what properties they are looking at. But geez, it was amazing. The trick with covering a novel is that one has to then indicate, in the notes, whether this property might make a good movie. Difficult thing to assess, since the narrative in a novel is significantly more complex than a script, and buried deep and twisted around so much internal character stuff. So one has to pluck that narrative out like the thread of a sweater and ask if that narrative is: adaptable, original, interesting and accessible to a wide audience, castable and of course, one must muse upon the expense of the whole thing. I gave this one a big thumb's up but did note that it would be expensive due to exotic locations and this falls under the category of Important Movie (aka Oscar bait) rather than a Friday night blockbuster, necessarily. I hope Seed pursues the property and that if they don't, someone else does, because I'd go see this movie in a red hot Hollywood minute.

I also cleaned my desk yesterday - I actually work at a funky dining table which sits next to two huge, old fashioned windows (in my very old place). I found, at the bottom of the stacks, no less than six scripts from casual acquaintances (to be defined as: neighbors, people I meet at events, etc.). These are scripts that they want me to peruse quickly. No such thing as perusing quickly. I did eliminate about three very quickly by doing the read-3-pages-while-standing-up-with-coffee test. I hate when I say yes I will give a script a quick look when in fact I always have so much else to do. I wind up feeling guilty and the scripts gather dust. My paying clientele has to come first. At the end of a long day of reading other stuff and administrating my business (which in fact is really three businesses) the last thing I'm in the mood for is - another script. And really nice dude I met at the Fade In Pitch Fest - you know who you are - you had a great pitch and I said I'd look at the script and it passed the read-3-pages-while-standing-up-with-coffee test and I know I said oh no biggie when you mentioned your script wasn't bound - but it is a big, fat bummer - if you bring scripts to events, three-hole punch and put brads in it!!

I also deal with business stuff on a daily basis. Answering approximately oh, these days even with my assistant running interference, 20 to 25 emails a day. Sending my bio here and there, figuring out where The Script Department booth will be located at the CS Expo and how many volunteers will be a the booth when and getting all the materials ready for that. Putting together class descriptions for an event in June 09. Fielding requests to announce or publish stuff on the Rouge Wave. Following up on scripts I am getting read on behalf of my clients at agents and managers. Dealing with the various bank accounts associated with my business(es). Making calls about ad buys past and present. And about 9,000 other things which are too specific to be of even mild interest. But you don't care about that stuff. It just keeps me quite busy is all I'm sayin'.

Which is why my favorite thing to do is to sit down with a script and a cup of coffee and a pen and just read quietly. I'm not really making decisions or judgments in that moment; I just read and let the pages fly by and absorb what I'm reading. I stop and make small notes but I think it's best for the story if it just flows like a river while being read. I make the judgments and comments later, when I'm done and I shift into note-giving mode. I really feel it's a luxury to sit and read scripts versus juggle the other, more odious things I mentioned above. And thankfully, these days I don't have to read three scripts a day so I am relaxed when I read now and give each script my all. When I used to do only production company reading I got into Reader Mode which is go, go, go, go and one gets jaded, burned out and exhausted. As I have said on the Rouge Wave many a time - this is who is reading your scripts if you don't have me read it first, so just know that. No use beating that horse again, you all know how I feel about the wisdom of getting notes before you throw your script into the lion filled colosseum of bored, tired, cranky-ass readers.

And then there's my personal life. (Insert long, uncomfortable moment of realization here).

The lines between my business and my personal lives are so blurred they are almost indistinguishable. My friends are my colleagues. Dinner, drinks and get-togethers always turn to scripts, the business, this or that agent or manager. I stay up very, very late at night since that's when I can catch up on emails and make decisions about things in a more thoughtful way. Those of you who may have gotten an email time-stamped at 2am know this about me. I also don't ever schedule anything - NOTHING - before 10am because I'm not really, truly awake until then. On those rare, awful occasions when I do have to be somewhere before 10am you'll notice I am quite pallid and inarticulate.

I can't figure out why my TiVo isn't recording all of the shows it's supposed to. I'm excited to vote this Tuesday. I left the fridge open again last night and the porch light is too high for me to fix myself. There's laundry in the dryer and six scripts staring at me and three important phone calls I have to make today. It's Halloween and I'm dressed as me - thinker, writer, entrepreneur, decider, mother of two and mother to many, a lover of movies and a lover of writing. Happy Halloween.

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Understanding the Business of Hollywood

Business. The very word send shivers down the spines of most creatives. Ew. That's why we write. Right? Most writers fancy ourselves artists for whom the mundane aspects of business management is a conscious choice we made to avoid. We can't bother ourselves with the details of the entertainment business, our taxes or god forbid the stock market! Nooooo we're too busy being dreamers, schemers, liars and thieves.

But guess what? You ARE a business. You are Joe Writer, Inc. And if you would like to pursue success, shoot it with a poison dart, drop it in a puddle of mud and skin and eat it, you need to do a whole more than study the craft of screenwriting, rent movies and watch Entertainment Tonight.

Are you keeping careful records of your writing expenses? Your software, books and classes? Are you reading the trades and following the box office returns? What about the spec market relative to new media and the general economy? Know anything about that? Well - I know it sounds odious, but you should. If you don't become an autodidact and do it now, you will be woefully in the dark about the business of Hollywood. And as much as writing is a fairly solitary, internal act, selling your writing is not.

From a post in June 2007, I repeat my snazzy catchphrase for every writer's daily activity:

WIPNILL

Write
Promote
Network
Learn
Live well

WPNLL©
*side effects may include a robust feeling of creativity, increased imagination and sense of well-being, productivity and monetary gain.

WRITE every day. You might have more than one project you’re working on; tend to at least one of them. And yes, generating ideas and spitballing is most productive and falls under this category, absolutely.

PROMOTE your material. Write and send query letters, enter competitions, follow up on calls, meetings and queries. Stay very on top of who has your material, when you’ll hear back and what new opportunities have since cropped up.

NETWORK both with other writers and with professionals where possible. If you belong to a message board about screenwriting, visit it daily seeking to build relationships. If you blog or read screenwriting blogs, visit and comment. Keep building those relationships. Are you signed up for a class? How about a one hour Learning Annex course? Is there a festival or film community gathering in two weeks? Sign up. Continually seek opportunities large and small to create, sustain and nurture relationships with other writers and filmmaking aspirants of any stripe. Networking is extraordinarily powerful. It is impossible to overstate that fundamental truth.

LEARN more about the craft and the business constantly. Follow the trades. If the Hollywood Reporter or Variety are too much to absorb regularly, read Entertainment Weekly – a quasi-trade with pull-quotes, box office and celebrity news. Subscribe to Creative Screenwriting, Script Magazine or Written By. Sign up for classes, read books and see a lot of movies.

LIVE WELL by taking care of your essential core. We writers are sensitive souls. We pour our hearts out every day. So be sure to exercise, get enough sleep, meditate or in some way return to your creative, essential self so that you can sustain and nurture the energy required to do steps one through four above. This one cannot be overstated or over-emphasized either. A burnt out writer doesn’t produce good material and isn’t fun to hang around with. Put your wellbeing before all else because everything you produce flows outward from that.

Why just today I had a business meeting with an investor and very successful businessman. As a small business owner do I get to whine in my coffee and say oh gee, I don't know how to write a business plan or think about LLCs and taxes? No. I do not have that luxury. When I have conversations with agents, managers or producers do I get to say oh gee, I don't know about what spec sold last week or how many movies Fox produced last year? No, I do not. Well - I do. At my own peril. And you do not have the luxury of ignorance either. Remember - you ARE a business. And your business in-sources to create product. Which you wish to sell. Right?

Then get busy livin' or get busy dyin' because if you don't take the time and trouble to learn the business end of things in this industry, you might as well put your script in a trunk in the attic when you're done.

Now get back to work.

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A Day in the Life of a P.A.

I asked my friend Julie M. to tell Wavers about her first experience as a P.A. Julie had a lot to say and the result is this delightful guest blog.

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3:45 am. Pitch black. Your alarm sounds. Panic. Your eyes peel back as you struggle to remember why you’re up so early. A thin layer of sweat begins to bead on the palms of your hands. Panic. Your brain registers: Today is your first day on the job. Not in the real world. Not in the fake world. In the only world: HOLLYWOOD.

4:10 am. You rush to your car Mapquest directions in hand. Moments later you’re on the road sipping on burnt, overly flavored 7-11 coffee. Nervous and excited for the adventure ahead, you gaze out your window as the sun peels back eyes of its own. You see rays of hope. Hope that after today everything will change. For today you take your first step onto the path of becoming a writer, director, producer, or filmmaker. Today you are a P.A.

A P.A. To some it may stand for Pennsylvania. Others may recognize it as a public announcement. The entertainment industry defines a P.A. as a production assistant. One would deduce from this title that the job of a production assistant is to assist in production. This is true in a minimalist sense. To imagine a P.A. just think of the duties of a personal assistant, multiply them by ten, cube that, put him or her on set and you’ve got yourself a production assistant.

My first gig as a P.A. was working on a two day shoot for a prominent commercial director who had his own production company. The job was an Apple spot. The set was located on Hidden Valley Ranch with acres of rolling green hills, voluptuous oak trees, quaint creeks, and lots of salad dressing (not really). Truly picturesque. Apple was releasing a new computer and the shot was set up where the moment a young man turns on his new Apple computer, he is blown away by how amazing it is literally through a mocked up country home out the front door landing on the base of a large oak tree.

7:00 am. The production coordinator arrives. I've been on set for 90 minutes already. She hands me my first call sheet, which was a detailed schedule of the day’s events, and a walkie-talkie. “Don’t lose this, always keep it on,” she said, “This is your lifeblood.” I was told to wait for further instruction, so I meandered over to the Craft Services table for breakfast grazing. Note: Craft Services is like Wolfgang Pucks on set. It’s the best place to be. Suddenly I’m radioed on the walkie. There’s an emergency (everything is always an emergency on set). A crew member was accidentally left behind. Mission: Go back to LA and retrieve missing crew member. Yes, LA’s morning rush hour traffic.

10 am. I arrive back on set with the missing crew member and a new appreciation for LA's morning rush hour traffic. A few things are unloaded from the trucks but everyone seems to be hanging around. Coffee and cigarettes. Must be a long breakfast. Then we see it: a 7 series jet black BMW makes its way down the dirt road. The director has arrived. At once everyone is up and set in to action. The crew spreads out: lights go up, grips are laying the cable, cameras are checked, the set is receiving its final touches, and the director’s chair stands. I’m radioed in: “Grips need an extra hand!” Who the heck are grips? “The art department is missing flour! Get flour!!” We’re in the middle of nowhere, where am I supposed to get flour? “Make sure the director has bottled sparkling water… lightly chilled!” But we only have flat water.

12:00 pm. Time for lunch. Finally, time to breathe. But wait. Talent has just arrived and talent has brought a girlfriend… who has a flight to catch out of LAX to Tokyo… in one hour. Then why bring her to set! Mission 2: Take talent’s girlfriend as fast as you can to the airport while making a quick stop by her apartment to grab her forgotten luggage. Yes, LA traffic, where rush hour never really ends.

3 pm. I arrive back on location around “Where have you been?!” Oh I don’t know. Driving model slash actress around for the past few hours. By the way, when do I get to assist in production? I walk over to the set. Wow. It’s happening. They’re in the middle of shooting. The set is beautiful. It really does look like a house. How did they put that up in a day? Everything appears to be going well except for the cat they had to pull because it refused to take direction. Crazy cat. The production coordinator motions me over and whispers in my ear, “Would you like to see how the magic happens?” She then leads me to stand right behind the director. Peering over his shoulder I watch as the tape is rolling and a commercial is made. It’s a good day.

4 pm. Another coffee break. A couple more hours of shooting where I run between set, the art department, the production trailer, juggling bottled water, wondering if this is all a hazing ritual or a potential dream come true. As the sun sets, the set comes down. That’s a wrap. I’m radioed in. Time to start loading up the trucks. No response. I’m radioed again. Heaven forbid I’m given a moment’s peace to answer nature’s call cramped in a Porto potty on the next hill over. “What’s your status?” Uh, well, I’m counting the squares of toilet paper before I form it into origami. So I act as any first time P.A. would, I respond: “Going to the bathroom.” The walkie responds: “What? Didn’t catch that?” Bowing my head in surrender, now yelling: “In the bathroom!” And silence. Nothing too embarrassing. Just exchanging potty duties from one woman to another. As I make my way back over the hill I am greeted by a standing ovation from the entire cast and crew. Little did I know, I had just announced my business on the general radio line.

10 pm. You’re on your way home from a long day’s work. Your body aches both physically and mentally. You sigh knowing that after only a few hours of sleep the adventure begins again. Then you smile at all the potential that lay ahead. With the array of people you met today each performing such diverse tasks all for one common goal, you realize that the possibilities are endless. You steer your own ship. You write your own play.

Midnight. As you drift off to sleep a warm blanket of peace envelops you for you know that tomorrow when you arise creation begins, life begins. As the sun rises…“LIGHTS!”, your eyes open…“CAMERA!”, you are the eyes in of any role you choose to play…“ACTION!”

There’s no business like show business. That’s an understatement. Working as a production assistant was a very insightful experience. I would advise anyone who is interested in pursuing a job in the film, television, or commercial industry to try a day in the life of a P.A. You truly are the ‘eyes in’ to all aspects of filmmaking. From getting your hands dirty with the grips, to flour in your hair from aiding the art department, to make-up and wardrobe, to learning the cameras, to the behind the scenes administrative work in the production trailer, to witnessing the magic eye of the director behind the camera, to watching the actors get in to character, all teams work together to create a magnificent modern work of art. Like the arms and legs of a giant squid who all function as one body spraying brilliant ink all over the screen for us to enjoy.

*A Production Assistant’s day rate typically ranges from 100 to 200 dollars depending on film or commercial, union or nonunion, etc.

To find a P.A. job one can cold call production companies directly or studio operators and ask to be directed to their production companies on the lot, or use any of the online resources such as: UTA joblist, imdb.com, filmstaff.com, monster.com, etc.

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Super Mentor Class!

My good friend Marc Zicree has a very cool SuperMentors class that he and his wife Elaine host from time to time and I wanted to highlight the class here on the Rouge Wave in case there are any locals who might be interested in the class. Class size is limited, so be in touch with Marc ASAP if you are interested!

****

The Six-Week Intensive in West Hollywood starts Wednesday at 7 PM, October 29, 2008, and there are only a few slots left. The Teleconference Six-Week Intensive starts Monday November 3, 2008, and takes place in the evening to accommodate the schedules of our students around the globe.

Just added is an incredible BONUS SESSION for the writers, actors, directors and producers who sign up for either our in-person Six-Week Intensive in West Hollywood, or the Six-Week Teleconference Intensive.

Each class is limited to just ten students.

For this special Bonus Session, we are initiating a first, by having the phenomenally successful and powerful Industry movers and shakers in our current Advanced Class actually meet with and advise you personally. These include:

• The Writer-Director-Actor who not only has had great roles on such hits as MONK and CRIMINAL MINDS in the last few months but also shot an entire feature in one day, won tons of awards with it and so impressed a major network exec that he is personally walking his next script into Focus Features!

• The Powerhouse Producer who has made seven features, set up co-productions with the UK, Australia and Spain, worked on LETHAL WEAPON 4 and A LEAGUE OF THEIR OWN and is currently setting up a bidding war between three networks for her next mega-hit TV show!

• The Star of three network series, numerous features and MOWs!

• The former Network Senior VP turned multi-feature producer!

• The Writer-Director-Producer with dozens of award-winning films and music videos under his belt!

• The Producer whose last film just landed a deal at Showtime & whose new film is being packaged at CAA!

• The Writer-Director alumnus of the Sundance Writers and Directors Labs and the Disney Fellowship who has sold hot feature scripts to Fox and Lions Gate and is now setting up financing for her two new features with major talent attached!

And more!
Each class is just $599 (discounted from $799 with this notice), and you can pay via credit card on Paypal by logging onto www.paypal.com and indicating you want to pay marc@zicree.com. Or you can mail a check to Marc Zicree at
7521 W. Norton Ave. #8, West Hollywood, CA 90046.

Feel free to email us at marc@zicree.com or call (323) 363-1259 with any questions.

(The Zicrees are also available to read scripts and consult individually. Call (323) 363-1259 for more info.)

TESTIMONIALS

Writer-Producer KAI SOREMEKUN: “Since taking their class I was selected out o f 12,000 submissions to be one of fifty semi-finalists chosen by Steven Spielberg to compete in his reality series ON THE LOT, which aired on FOX, and as a result I received a first look deal with Dreamworks. Marc and Elaine are worth every penny and more.”

DAMON LINDELOF (co-creator & showrunner of LOST): “I've known Marc for several years now, and aside from his Hugo Awards and Encyclopedic Knowledge of pretty much every sci-fi and genre story written or broadcast in the last century, I also consider him a genuine writing talent. Not to mention, he is an absolute pleasure as a human being, which is no small thing in a writer's room.”

Actor TOM KATSIS: "When I took the Supermentors class, Marc and Elaine made me realize that booking small under-five roles didn't really showcase my talent. Within that same year, I co-produced and starred in a short that allowed me to play a part that would have taken me years to bag going through the casting process. This short film has garnered great reviews from industry players and is opening new doors for me. Thank you, Marc and Elaine!”

Actor-Writer-Producer JAI KHALSA: “THANK YOU BOTH so much! I'm eternally grateful to you for continuing to do what you do so well, mentoring people in all facets of the Industry. I have to admit, the absolute simplicity of your tools can be a little overwhelming at times. I find myself saying ‘Really? T hat's all I need to do? Okay!!’ Once the surprise wears off, it's great. :)”

RAY BRADBURY: “Marc Zicree is amazing!”

Writer JIM TROESH: “In the 18 months since taking their class, I won the ABC/Disney Scholarship and am developing a pilot with a vice president at ABC. If that was not enough, I was hired to write two feature screenplays, both of which are now in the pipeline to production. Thanks, Marc and Elaine!”

Writer BRYCE FULLER: "As a direct result of their mentorship, I achieved the following: Assistant position to prominent Director; Full Time employment in Story Development Department at a Fox 2000 based production company; Achieved goal of getting one of my screenplays optioned. The enthusiasm and creativity of the Zicrees put them at the top of my list for mentorship!"

Producer NANCY FULTON: "With techniques taught by the Zicrees, I produced four documentaries in 3 years and am now producing an independent feature film. The Zicrees have launched, supported and salvaged thousands of careers . . . including mine."

CLIFF GALBRAITH: "I believe I was never more inspired or productive than during and directly following my lessons with Marc and Elaine. If you want to sell a script, direct a film, produce a television show or make it as an actor, RUN, do not walk to sign up for the Supermentors class."

Casting Director20PIXIE MONROE: “Marc and Elaine have skillfully mentored and molded the careers of many of the finest Industry Professionals in Hollywood and provided them with a wonderful forum to network, grow creatively and reach new heights in the careers!”

Actress-Producer Barbara Kerr Condon: “Because I took their counsel to heart, I began producing my own projects instead of waiting for someone else to hire me. I am now in the process of producing and starring in my third film project! See you at the movies!”

Writer MICHAEL T. MOORE: “Marc and Elaine have really shown me how to think about my career in a different way, and how to break down a seemingly unachievable goal into smaller, achievable steps. I recently sold my first story to the television show MEDIUM!”

Author, Actor and Screenwriter DEREK RYDALL: "Not only did their coaching take a wrecking ball to many of my limited beliefs, it gave me the tools and tenacity to get a two-book deal and another script optioned!”

Actor MIKE OLIFIERS: "Before I took their class, I thought there were all these rules that stopped me dead. Thanks to them, I found how to make myself stand out and punch through to the career I dreamed of. I got personal meetings with top showrunners and landed major roles on shows such as NYPD BLUE. One day of work on BRUCE ALMIGHTY turned into three weeks of shooting. Now I' m sitting in the front row at the premiere!"

Bestselling Author STEVEN-ELLIOT ALTMAN: "When Marc and Elaine took me under their wing, I was green, fresh from New York and without a single Industry contact. With their guidance, I pitched my unsold novel as a TV and movie project twenty-three times in five days, ending up with NINE offers from major companies and the heat that sold the novel as a Columbia-Tristar/TNT pilot, with myself attached as writer and producer!"

Writer and former Minority Leader of the South Dakota House of Representatives VINCE GREEN: “Despite having published two courtroom novels and having a script optioned by DreamWorks, I couldn’t figure out how to open the right doors to take the next step in my career. Thanks to Marc and Elaine’s class I made a break through. I got NCIS and LAW & ORDER to consider me for a writing position and now have a manager. None of this would have been possible without Marc and Elaine’s class.”

Actor-Writer MICK PRESTON: "I've been acting for about 11 years and had absolutely no luck in meeting the people I'd been targeting. With the Zicrees' coaching, we formulated a plan to reach those people more effectively. The next day, I made 20 calls. By week 6, I had set up appointments with 16 MAJOR industry people. I had about an 80% success rate!"

JIM DUNN AND SAM ERNST: "Since we took your seminar we’ve e managed to put the insights we picked up from you to good use. We've now sold 3 screenplays on top of the one we had optioned when we met you, all without an agent. Better yet, we pitched an idea that got one producer so excited it's not only getting made, we're directing it!"

Director & 1st A.D. MARTY ELCAN (SIX FEET UNDER): “Marc and Elaine think outside the box, around the box, through the box, and sometimes even throw out the box altogether!”

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Your "and then" Moment

Maybe it's because I'm generally cheerful and definitely Irish but so many people have been coming to me lately, feeling discouraged. Writers, directors, producers, friends. Maybe it's the feeling in the air about the economy, maybe it's the bittersweet feeling of Autumn, maybe it's the delayed World Series game last night - but so many people are feeling a bit down right now. To which I say - hey! What about your "and then" moment? No, I don't mean and theeeeen like in DUDE, WHERE'S MY CAR? Although that was pretty funny.

No, I mean the "and then" moment that tends to be right on the coattails of being on the brink of giving up. A dear friend of mine, a director, just had an "and then" moment about a week ago. He was feeling so down and then out of the blue, he got a gig directing a movie. Boom. Landed in his lap. Or another friend of mine who was feeling at the end of her rope when her manager called; the script is at ICM and they had great notes and it's going wide. Or me. I was having some feelings of frustration and what-the-hell-am-I-doing last week when a) so many Rouge Wavers wrote in with words of incredible kindness and encouragement (thank you to each and every one of you; I may not have replied but I read your comments and I was touched) and b) a prominent and very successful businessman called me out of the blue and wants to meet this week to discuss taking The Script Department to a whole new level. Wow! That call came right when I needed it!

Just the other day somebody told me the story of Ellen Pompeo (Grey's Anatomy) who had packed her apartment and her car - ready to leave town. And on the way out of town, she went to one final audition. For THE MOONLIGHT MILE. She got the part and the rest is history. You hear so many stories like that, particularly in entertainment. Who knows, maybe Isaac Newton was depressed when he sat under that apple tree?

So if in any area of your life, you are feeling down and out, ready to throw in the towel, just know that you could be on the brink of your "and then" moment. And what if you quit just before that "and then" magic strikes? What if, sometimes you have to get to your lowest point before opportunity and inspiration rings your doorbell?

Everybody feels this way sometimes. It's life. But to all those writers out there, I really mean what I say in my Script Department logo (which I borrowed from one of my favorite movies, GALAXY QUEST), never give up, never surrender!

Do it for me, do it for all of us. Keep writing, keep creating. I can't wait to hear your "and then" story. Now, by Grabthar's Hammer - get back to work.

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Russian Musical Tribute to Palin

...you know it's bad when the Russians get involved. This is hilarious.

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From the Mailbag

Dear Wave-inatrix: I was wondering if it was possible for you to explain on the RW how movie budgeting works. I don't quite know how to figure out if my script is a low-budget or a high budget one. What budgeting factors should I take into consideration when developing my idea before I dive into writing the script?
Thanks,
Languishing in Lillehammer

Dear Lillehammer:

Andrew Zinnes here. As the sort of production person at TSD, Julie asked me to answer your budgeting questions.

What makes a script expensive are the following - lots of locations (especially exotic), lots of characters, huge movie stars, animals, lots of stunts, visual effects, pyrotechnics, children, rain & snow and large set pieces. All of these things require a huge crew, multiple cameras, lots of travel, long post-production phases, long pre-production phases (for testing things) and lots of insurance! Movie star salaries and fees for the producers eat up a lot of a budget too. Due to this you can see why something like Batman would be in the $150-$200 million range. And I'm not even including marketing, advertising, etc.

So the cheapest film would be one with 1-3 main characters in one or two locations with very little special effects or stunts. If the characters aren't stars, you can save money too. But the only way that will work is if you go with something like horror or a thriller where the genre attracts viewers by itself. You can do a small drama or comedy too as they don't require any of the expensive stuff. These tend to be more film festival films though. So something like Little Miss Sunshine or Half Nelson might come under this heading. I believe those films were made for under $10 million.

A good thing to do to get an idea of what the budget range of films are is to go to IMDB (The Internet Movie Database) and enter in some of your most recent favorite films. Then go to the business/boxoffice section and see what the budget is.

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Pitch Perfect

Day two of the Fade In Pitch Fest concluded yesterday and boy, was it a long day for everybody! I think heard as many pitches as some of the agents, managers and producers there, just in a different context. I was so proud of the many writers who I had counseled the day before to be more upbeat and personable, who took that advice with aplomb and had many successful pitches.

Here's my take on pitch fests. If you have the disposable income to do this type of thing, I think it can be a fun way to network, meet other writers and industry professionals and practice pitching your story over and over again. If you are like most of us, on a more limited budget and you have to carefully choose how and where you spend your money, I'd honestly recommend spending that money on professional notes over pitching. Maybe you can afford to do both. Booyah for you and have a cupcake.

Let's clear something up: Yes the people who come to hear your pitches are lower level executives. Of course they are. This. Is not. A bad. Thing. Let me repeat that - it's not bad that lower level baby execs and even assistants go to hear your pitches. Because what does mama always say? Today's assistant is tomorrow's executive. One drawback is that sometimes these lower level pitch recipients do appear to be about twelve. Which can be off-putting. Sometimes their social skills are not quite where they will be in some time. Meaning that if they are bored by your pitch, some can actually be a bit obvious and rude about that. Pay no mind - that's about them, not you. Others are enthusiastic and dying to find a good story so they can get the promotion they are gunning for. Are there good pitches at pitch fests? Yes, of course there are. I heard, over both days, probably about six pitches that sounded really great to me. I would definitely be interested in reading the scripts.

If you do decide to go to a pitch fest (I believe that the upcoming CS Expo, starting on November 12th usually has a pitch fest as part of the festivities) here's your check list:

Bring a one-sheet
Have a great, pithy, compelling logline ready to go*
Bring business cards
Do not pass out artistic effluvia related to your script
Dress casually but nicely; do make some effort. Brush your hair and teeth**
Do some breathing exercises, drink coffee - whatever it takes to be both relaxed and ON
Practice a couple of days in advance then stop practicing so much so you sound natural
Relax; if you make a mistake, smile, back up and do it again. It's really okay
Don't take rejection personally; just get back in line and do it again
Do collect contact information if you have a good pitch
Send thank you notes a couple of days later. Make them brief and gracious

Are pitch fests worth it? Well - I cannot say one way or the other, definitively. If you can afford it, if it's something you enjoy doing and if you have a great script that's really, really ready to pitch, sure, I suppose it's worth it. You can also query your material the old fashioned way, throughout most of the year. I've been to three pitch fests since June and I have noticed a high rate of return. In other words, I have seen some of the same people at all three. Is this because these writers are very successful at this or is it because, like Trekkies, they are devoted fans of these types of gatherings? I don't know and I'm not sure I should go there.

All right everybody, get back to work and have a Monday cupcake on me. I'm a happy girl because I just discovered that I apparently own some crazily valuable rare books so today after I get my reading and notes done, I'll be researching how to sell them. If any Wavers are rare book appraisers, or know a great one, be in touch.

*I was shocked by how many writers either did not have a logline at all or who had overlong, confusing, not great loglines and knew it.

**It's not for nothing that I make the hair and teeth comment. In the spirit of kindness, that's all I'm going to say.

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The Mini-W Reviews: High School Musical 3

Quite a while ago, when I first heard that the 3rd installment of the hit Disney movie High School Musical was coming out in theaters, I thought to myself, MAN I gotta see that. I remember when the sensation first came out. I was at a friend’s house, and her 9-year-old sister convinced us to watch the movie with her. Little did we know, it would be something insanely popular. Like, clothing line popular. We laughed at the tacky dialogue, smiled at the stereotypical love story, and (much to our disbelief) could not get the songs out of our head. As the love for High School Musical grew in young girls more and more, I could already tell there would be a sequel. How could there not be? Zac Effron and Vanessa Hudgens were no longer just performers. They were stars.

As HSM3 started, you could already tell by just the quality that there was a muchhh higher budget for this movie. I haven’t seen High School Musical 2, but compared to the original HSM, this one was full of money. Although things like bad acting and cheesy plot lines were something I expected, I was very disappointed by the song sequences. Not the dances, but the singing. It was so clearly prerecorded that the actors mouths didn’t even quite match up to the words they were singing. Also, how come Zac Effron isn’t on Broadway? I want to see that kid dance some more! The thing that stood out most to me in this entire film was how coordinated, smooth, and precise his dancing was. I am actually pretty excited to see the upcoming film ME AND ORSON WELLES where Effron stars aside Claire Danes in his first serious role. I’m very curious as to whether he can actually act, or if he should take the DAMN stage like I said so.

In the end, High School Musical 3 was delightfully tacky, kept me entertained, and is something to take your daughter (or niece ) to go see when you’re in a silly mood.

I’d give this movie a 3 out of 5 jelly beans.

***

The Mini-W is 15 and a sophomore in high school. A movie nut from her earliest days, she is a semi-regular movie review contributor to the Rouge Wave. She shoots from the hip and tells it like it is from her perspective.

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Take Me to the River

Sorry to have been grumpy earlier today guys; mama gets tired and mama hates whiners. Or should I say whingers?

Sorry too about the title of this blog post - might not make sense. Feelin' a little Al Green today.

On the Sony lot today for several hours, and will be again tomorrow all day, doing pitch coaching for the Fade In Pitch Fest. I probably heard 50 pitches today and of those, I would say that 3 were WOW pitches. Good ideas pitched well. The rest - well, a few just sad pitches and a lot of meh pitches. Two things struck me today. One, I was shocked - shocked I tell you! - by the number of writers who didn't have loglines. Didn't. Have. Loglines. Had pages and pages of scribbled notes but couldn't boil their script down to a logline. Two, the number of writers who droned memorized pitches at me and were dull, dull, dull.

I told writers again and again - look, if you aren't enthusiastic about your own story, how can I be? Liven it UP some! Smile! Relax! Be excited about your pitch! Some writers, upon hearing that, busted into huge grins and their entire countenance changed. That! See - that you! Be that you while pitching! One guy had a truly cute pitch - I would have read the script in a heartbeat. But his delivery was so boring. He was one of the guys who totally changed when I interrupted him and asked him to please allow himself to grin at the truly funny, unique thing he had just said about his main character - because it WAS really a great thing. He grinned from ear to ear, bashfully and began again. And did a great job.

Going to a pitch fest is like speed dating. How you look and how you feel are a huge part of how your pitch is received. If it's a scary pitch - pitch it in a scary way. If it's funny - for god's sake smile! I heard grown men pitch to me in pinched voices of such nervousness that it broke my heart. On the other hand, there was this one writing team, two women, and not only did they have a fun pitch and a script I would totally read (and will) but they had such fun energy. They were engaging and funny and dressed well; I would have bought snow from them if I were Sarah Palin.

Personality counts. I know so many writers are shy and quiet and I feel for them. It's hard to pitch. Pitch Fests are not everyone's cup of tea. I personally feel that they are touch-and-go in terms of how valuable they are - it really depends - but they can be a great way to meet people and practice pitching. One guy had a sheaf of papers on which he'd written his notes. He picked up his notes and began to read. I reached over and took them away from him and turned them upside down. Now pitch. And he did. And the more I encouraged him to tell me why this is an exciting story, the more a passionate, unmemorized pitch began to emerge from him. Turns out he's been thinking about this story idea since 7th grade. Turns out that this was a story about fathers and sons and loss and revenge. Turns out that the place he is from has informed his passion for the project. And his pitch improved 1000%. He went from oh god make this pitch stop to oh wow, this is interesting simply by putting down his notes and making eye contact and remembering why in the hell he spent a year on this project.

If you really cannot smile, relax and be enthusiastic about your pitch, pitch fests are probably not for you. How successful would a door mouse unable to make eye contact do at speed dating? Well - how successful is anyone at speed dating? That's another blog. But if you really, really struggle with this - skip pitch fests. If you are lucky enough to get in a room for a real pitch, you will have the warm up period of small talk. You don't have that luxury at pitch fests. So think long and hard on this before you spend your money on a pitch fest. And for the love of Obama - have a logline before you go!!

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What Mama Knows

Not all comments sent to the Rouge Wave get published. Some are hostile, weird, lengthy and elliptical. So sorry you occasional angry, weird or elliptical commenters - I read what you have to say, I do, but not everything is appropriate. Someone sent in a LONG, detailed list of questions for Hilary; some of the questions were oddly personal and loaded. I think it's fair to say that Hilary just had her mind blown and she is exhausted and very busy following up on all her meetings this week. So she doesn't have time for a boatload of weird questions. Someone, apparently a Brit, sent in a comment on the blog post about proofreading, that I should "stop whinging on my clients".

Tell you what, Apparently British Commenter who must be new to the Rouge Wave - the difference between me and say another person who runs a script coverage service or a screenwriting competition, is that I am the real deal. I do not hide behind a polished veneer of mysterious corporate-ness, I talk about what is really going on from where I sit and offer insights into what is going on behind the scenes. The Script Department has a huge clientele; MOST of our clients do proofread and do try their best and handle notes very well. But a few do not. We have far too many clients for any one person to go oh GOD, she was talking about ME and of course, being that one cannot be a dumb bunny and do what I do, I always use composite examples that have a lesson to be learned for you Rouge Wavers. Most of the time, I am preaching to the choir; of course you should proofread, everybody knows that. Of course one or two or four typos is not going to ruin your script, of course pros have typos too. This is just common sense.

In every service application for TSD, clients are asked what their experience and goals are. Some say THIS IS A VERY ROUGH FIRST DRAFT, I just want to know where the story can be strengthened. Others say, I'm close to sending this out and I want to know how well this will fare in the spec world. If we are told that the script is a very rough draft, we will not worry as much about typos, etc. We'll point them out but we understand this is an early draft, clearly not ready for prime time. You would be surprised how many scripts that are described in the latter category are also full of format and language errors.

There are script coverage services who claim to "scout" your work if it receives a "consider" from the reader. This scouting (and I know, first-hand) involves sending an impersonal email to a list of contacts with nothing more than your logline. When I check in with my contacts about a script that I love, I get on the phone with my contacts or better yet, take them to lunch. I just had lunch with a very cool, very eager young development exec yesterday and gave him four scripts to read. I take my business very personally. It's my baby, my reputation and my passion. So I don't hide behind corporate ownership or public bs. I don't have the stomach for it. Oddly, I can tell it like it is in a fairly nice way, too.

I see all kinds of things from my clientele. I see great ideas executed poorly, I see poor ideas executed poorly and I see everything in-between. I see writers who work very hard and are as professional as can be, I see writers who are already established, I see temperamental writers who just don't get it and I see everything in-between. If you like, I can cease sharing my insights and just write about general screenwriting tips or I can share with you what I deal with. One thing I have learned is that the more insight a writer has into the business end of screenwriting, the more advantage that writer has. Of course, I do have a line - I would never name a writer or a script, I would never name a manager I recently dealt with who was a sumb*tch about something (he has a great reputation, normally). If I have lunch with an industry exec who shares something negative with me about someone you'd all know - I would not share that. That actually happened yesterday. Not your business. So, I share as much as I can appropriately share and I share what I think is instructive. I share what I wish I had known when I was first starting out in this confusing world of screenwriting and entertainment. I try to stay positive but I'm sorry, if noting that a particular script I got was literally sans punctuation is "whinging" then I will whinge away, yes. Because that is just ludicrous. You want the truth, nicely put? Or do you want a bunch of cupcake frosting that leads you nowhere? I don't know of another script coverage business of the magnitude of The Script Department that bothers to blog six days a week about what's going on within the business in general and within my business. Someone commented recently, that scripts should be short and to the point and that I should take a cue from that and shorten my blog posts. Again - six days a week and nobody pays mama to do that. There will come a time when I will not be able to keep up with the Rouge Wave - some pretty huge (and exciting) changes are afoot for The Script Department for 2009. I am not at liberty to talk about it yet but it's pretty cool. I am happiest when I am really in knee-deep with my business and what's going on. I may not have that luxury in the future. For now, I like to share what's going on because I wish someone had done that for me ten years ago.

Sorry to be a bit cranky today - I am off to help coach writers as they pitch at the Fade In Pitch Fest today and tomorrow. Mama works hard and I tell it like it is - nicely, with some cupcake sprinkles on top. I can't please everyone. Sorry, Long List of Questions of Hilary Guy. That was too much and not all of it was your business.

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Final Guest Blog: Hilary Graham

So, where to begin? My trip to LA is coming to a close and I am totally exhausted by it all, but my mind is also racing from all that I’ve seen, done, and learned this week. First and foremost, I want to say that any of you who entered the Silver Screenwriting Contest this year and didn’t win—enter again next year. You WANT to win this prize. The cash is nice, sure, but the real prize has been this trip. Not only have Julie, Andrew, and Margaux set up tons fabulous meetings with producers and A-List screenwriters (Blake Snyder, Steve Faber, David Arata) they been amazing supporters of my script and my career in general. When I was complaining yesterday of how I don’t really have any writing community in NH that I can bounce ideas off of, Julie said to me in her nurturing way, “that’s what we’re here to do for you.” Clearly, The Script Department is more than just your average script consulting service. Sure, they’ll give you great notes, but they are devoted to shepherding writers in every aspect of this business. I now have a team of talented, insightful WRITERS behind me who actually have a stake in helping to pave the way for my success. I absolutely cannot underestimate the importance of that kind of thing. Talk about priceless. Thanks to them I am more than just a name of on cover page to a slew of working producers in this town. Shit, I had dinner with a friggin’ Academy Award nominated screenwriter last night (David Arata). Some of the relationships I made here this week (thanks to Julie and the gang) may just be the very thing that breaks my career.

Oh, and just one last point about how full-service they have been in crafting my Whirlwind Adventure in Hollywood. Leaving no stone unturned, they also made sure I was in all the hip LA places inhabited by a Successful Screenwriter so that for these few days I was actually living in that world. From drinks with Blake Snyder at Chateau Marmont, to lunch with the Script Department at fancy-shmancy dining room on the Paramount lot where we sat across from Tony Shalhoub. (By the way, I highly recommend the grilled scallop and peach salad.) Oh, and a special shout-out to Margaux who was kind enough to take me to the soundstage where they were shooting her episode of PRIVILEGED. So much fun to watch them rehearse!

Okay, dinner with David Arata. The man has a great energy—calm, thoughtful, sweet. He was humble and encouraging, and his take on this business couldn’t have been more different than Steve Faber’s. Two different successful writers - two different takes. So, what’s the lesson here? That there is no one set path to make your way in Hollywood. One thing David said that I found interesting was that, “there’s no place to rest.” Meaning that even at this stage in his career (which includes an Oscar nomination!) he doesn’t feel “safe,” or like the business is easy, or that he will always get work and not just fade away into yesterday’s news. When he said that fear drives the creative process, I don’t really think he meant it as a joke. Thinking about this notion, my first reaction is, holy frigging shit. But when I think more deeply about it, I don’t necessarily think this is a bad thing. I think as writers, we know first-hand that the thing that fuels our creativity isn’t necessarily all unicorns and daisies. Where does out drive to create come from? Where does ambition come from? I don’t really have the answers to those questions, but I think the fact that you’re always trying to make it in this town, the fact that it never stops, may sound crazy and absurd, but in a way, is really just like life.

Well, I guess that’s it for now. I am taking the red-eye home and have big plans to lie around in my PJs and watch cheesy TV for the next couple of days. Then on Monday, I hit the ground running. Again, my many thanks to Julie, Margaux, and Andrew at the Script Department for choosing me, and for arranging this amazing, unforgettable trip. When I sell my first spec for mid-six figures against high-six-figures, I promise to guest-blog again and share the good news. ;)

--Hilary

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Is It Wrong to Have So Much Fun?

I gotta say - I am enjoying Hilary's visit at least as much as she is. Just back from lunch at Paramount with Hilary and my Script Department partners, Margaux and Andrew. Hilary arrived early and toured the set of Privileged with Margaux.

I'd never been on the Paramount lot before - WOW. Having driven past it a million times I must admit I was disappointed not to find any Oompa Loompas or a chocolate river. Whatever, man. We had lunch in the fancy dining room, punctuated by the tinkle of glasses and soft conversation. We sat near Tony Shalhoub - wow, he is very handsome in person! I tried to catch his eye multiple times and even said one of his lines from GALAXY QUEST but he didn't notice me.

Later on today we meet David Arata, one of the Academy Award nominated writers of CHILDREN OF MEN. That is going to be very thrilling for both Hilary and I. And of course we had a blast with Steve Faber yesterday evening. Steve is one of my dearest friends and never, ever, ever fails to completely delight me. He was so kind to read Hilary's script, take us to dinner and download Hilary with a ton of useful information. He even offered to set Hilary up at a meeting with his agent at ICM, as well as his entertainment attorney. Hilary was over the moon!

Drinks with Blake Snyder on Tuesday night was lovely. The Chateau Marmont is THE place to be, judging from the trendy crowd and their crab/artichoke dip was to die for. And of course Blake - if there is a more genteel, intelligent, generous man out there, I'd like to meet him

I'm so proud that our idea to give the grand prize winner of our competition an unforgettable experience has turned out so beautifully. Hilary is knocking 'em dead in her meetings; we're getting great feedback. And I'm having fun too. I've gotten to spend quite a bit of time with Hilary and she is delightful; smart, a talented writer and loving her experience. We must be doing something right because this is just so fun. I can't wait to squire around next year's winner too, and the year after that. How many people get to love their jobs as much as I do? I am so lucky and I never forget it. Even if there is no chocolate river at Paramount. I think I'll write a letter to the groundskeepers!

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Guest Blog: Hilary Graham

At 9:00pm on Wednesday, after a long day of meetings, I go downstairs from my lovely hotel room at The Farmer’s Daughter (another wonderful part of my Silver Screenwriting prize!) to meet Julie and Steve Faber at Tart for drinks. I’m completely exhausted, but I’m very excited to meet Steve because (among other things) he wrote THE WEDDING CRASHERS, which I adore. This will be my first meeting with the big time screenwriter and I’m curious to hear the perspective of someone who is actually living the dream. Not to mention the fact that he personally knows Owen Wilson. Plus, the whole thing is really a “bonus prize” and Steve’s agreeing to meet me because he’s a good friend of Julie’s. So we’re scheduled for drinks, which is very cool, but it gets better. Steve’s actually read my script, FREEBIRD, and get this—he likes it! He even goes so far as to use the word “talented.” Of course, he has some notes, but I’m quickly getting the feeling that this is good. I was talking yesterday about the value of Fairy Godmothers and I think I now need to amend that to Fairy Godpeople.

Well, when Steve, Julie, and I sit down I’m pretty beat—still a little bit on east coast time, spent from chatting and the energy drain of having to be totally charming all day long. But about 60 seconds into our meeting, it’s like someone’s put the paddles to my chest, and I’m pretty sure I hear a voice yelling “Clear!” But when I look across the table it’s just Steve Faber talking and smoking cigars. Remember that old E.F. Hutton commercial? “When E.F. Hutton talks—people listen.” That’s how I feel in Steve’s presence. I’m pretty sure I was slack-jawed and wide-eyed for the better portion of our meeting. Here is a man who really knows how to succeed in this town and he’s sharing his experience with me in the spirit of helping guide my career in the best possible direction. Amazing. And if that wasn’t generous enough, he keeps trying to share his appetizers with me. Before meeting Steve, Julie had told me that he was incredibly supportive of new talent. Now I am feeling the effects of that advocacy. This isn’t the kind of thing you can glean from a book, and I can only hope I adequately expressed my gratitude to Julie for hooking me up with Steve, and to Steve, for sharing his time and wisdom with me.

Steve Faber is a living manifestation of Life in Hollywood: The Successful Screenwriter who has literally seen it all. Aside from being an incredibly talented writer, he is a straight shooter and a tour de force. Smart, funny, deep, real, and a natural born storyteller. You know that scene in THE WIZARD OF OZ where Dorothy discovers the man behind the curtain? That’s how I felt last night as Steve told me story after story about his experience as a Hollywood screenwriter. As Steve talks I feel like I’m walking deeper and deeper into the belly of the beast and that the map I’ve been relying on to navigate this town is some completely useless scam sold only to tourists.

Though I am completely overwhelmed with this sudden overload, (not to mention the fact that Steve repeatedly reiterates that I MUST move out here if I want to make it happen) I can’t help thinking what a gift this night has been. What a gift this trip has been. Of course, I say that from a place of gut-wrenching neurotic questioning. I have run myself ragged over the last three days, driving all over this crazy city, workin’ it the best I know how, and now I can’t go to sleep without first downloading my thoughts. It’s 3:00am in NH so my husband is definitely asleep but my mind is reeling. How am I branding myself as a writer? Do I move to L.A.? Should I listen to the advice of others in terms of which of my ideas are “saleable” or do I just ignore everyone and trust my gut? I feel like I already know the answers to these questions but I need to churn for a while until I can accept the truth. I have five meetings tomorrow so I better get some sleep. I can’t wait to meet David Arata (CHILDREN OF MEN) at the end of my day. I’ll report back with more Tales from Hollywood tomorrow, unless my brain should happen to explode first….

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Guest Blog: Hilary Graham

Hello, Rouge Wavers, this your guest blogger, Hilary Graham. My script FREEBIRD was the Grand Prize Winner of the Silver Screenwriting Contest, so Julie suggested I share a bit about my experience while I’m here in LA enjoying the many fruits of my wonderful prize package. It’s nearly midnight and I just returned from the Château Marmont where Julie & I had drinks with screenwriter and author, Blake Snyder. If I were back home in NH, I’d probably be asleep by now (you gotta wake up early to slop the hogs, you know). But since I’m here in Los Angeles I’m wearing lipstick and using the phrase “four-quadrant picture” and hanging out at “The Chateau” across from Rosario Dawson and next to a man who has actually sold multiple scripts for seven figures.

Blake Snyder is a great guy and truly a guru in the best of the word. He’s like a screenwriting Yoda. (Tomorrow I will try to telekinetically lift a Studio Executive using the force.) If you haven’t read Blake’s Save the Cat! book series, I highly recommend you check it out. I’ve read many screenwriting books, and I have to say that Blake’s Save the Cat! is by far the most down-to-earth straightforward analysis of how a screenplay works, written in a concise, personal, easy-to-read style. I’ve found it particularly helpful to turn to it when I’m trying to work out the beats of a script. In any case, it was great to be able to meet Blake in person glean some of his wisdom in between sips of my yummy vodka drink in a setting I’d only read about in People Magazine. Blake is clearly a very generous man, not only of his time (and I honestly don’t know how he fit in meeting with me with the gazillion other projects he’s working on) but also with his insights. One of the nicest things about our meeting was getting to be amongst people who all truly love doing what they’re doing, even though each of us is at different stage in our journey. I think in this business, where it’s easy for people to grow bitter, I always find it heartening to meet people who are not only happy because of their own accomplishments, but also seek to encourage others’ success.

Speaking of which, Julie has been like a Fairy Godmother to me, nurturing and supportive of my script, and working hard to help advance my career by setting up meetings with writers and production companies. (More details to follow as I have these meetings over the next few days.) Anyway, I’m tremendously grateful for her advocacy, and I urge all of you other aspiring screenwriters go out and get yourself a cheerleader.

Anyway, my first 48 hours in LA have been a whirlwind, (my manager has also set up a full schedule of meetings for me so it’s go, go, go) and my week is just beginning…. Thinking about it is too exhausting, so instead, I’ll just try to remember to breathe, to be brief, to learn something from every meeting, to forgive myself when I don’t make a perfect pitch, and to have fun. I was sitting in the waiting room at Paramount today listening to some middle-aged guy in a suit talk on his cell phone and it occurred to me—we’re all here doing this cause we like telling stories. How cool is that?

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Sweat the Small Stuff

I hate to sound like a school marm. I do. I'm a fun person. And I'm not a stickler in life. If my dinner order is pretty hot but not piping hot, I don't send it back. If someone cuts me off in traffic, I give them the benefit. If there's sand on my sheets from the beach, I shake it out and sweep up the next day. Anyone who knows me knows that I am in fact diplomatic to a fault. Very little upsets me, very little irks me.

But lately unproofread scripts are driving me nuts. Maybe it's because I'm viewing things through a new lens - that of a possible manager. See - even now, I can't quite commit by using a stronger, more declarative statement. Okay let's just say I'm strongly toying with the idea to the point that I have taken on one client and am mildly, curiously looking for more. Maybe. If I read a great script.

But in the day to day I'm still the mama of The Script Department. And in that capacity, I read at least one script daily. And I read pretty fast. I like to settle down with a cup of coffee and immerse myself in a script without interruptions. I don't sit near my computer, I don't answer the phone. I give each script my full attention.

I always have a pen nearby, to circle problems or leave notes for myself. The little things - spelling, grammar, logic questions, etc., I note directly on that particular page. The big problems I scribble on the title page. So I might have Big Notes that say: scene work. character arcs. structure. soft premise.

Lately, I have been circling a whole lot of little problems on pages. Dialogue that does not end with a punctuation mark. Errant commas. Characters names all-capped throughout the script or not done at all. Missing ages for characters. Misspells, malaprops. Sheek for chic, peer for pier, your for you're, to for too.

And every time I have to stop reading to circle those problems, my read is interrupted. I am taken out of the story for a nanosecond. And that irks me. Because I need to be in the flow of the story. And if I pause for one nanosecond for every error but I do that six times on almost every page - pretty soon my focus on the story itself starts to fade.

Production company readers slam the writer for these types of sloppy, lazy errors. I note the problem to a client but of course, I am not about slamming, just knuckle rapping. Why my clientele feels a good proofread is not necessary when sending to me, I don't know. I think they figure that they'll be rewriting the script anyway, since they're getting notes so the small stuff doesn't matter. But it does. It lowers my estimation of the writer - just a tiny bit. And, more importantly, it distracts me from the story. If a writer keeps making the same punctuation mistakes over and over, you'd think you could stop circling them and just make one overall comment that they need to proofread. That would do the trick. But - I can't help but circle them. Every time I read a your for you're I cringe. It's a tick that most readers have. It bugs us. It bugs us A LOT.

When your script is read, you really want the reader to be totally focused on your story and your characters. Proofreading isn't for perfectionists or bookish types, it's a gateway to a smooth read. How valuable are receiving notes that are mini-lessons in contractions, comma usage or proper punctuation? Aren't you more interested in receiving notes about character arc, dialogue and structure? Isn't that the top priority? It is for me, as a story analyst. But proper grammar, punctuation and spelling are the delivery system for your story.

Imagine watching a television show and every 3 seconds, you see something wrong - a prop that keeps switching, a costume change, a stumble over dialogue. Pretty soon, that's all you see - not the story itself. And imagine the producers of the show saying - yeah, yeah, ignore those details, just get into the story, man!

The details need to be right in order for the story to shine. Why, just last week I read a script in which the writer didn't bother to end lines of dialogue with punctuation marks throughout about 50% of the script. Missing periods and missing question marks. It amazes me that this is something one would not notice.

To me, missing punctuation marks are glaring red neon signs I don't know where the sentence ends I can't tell if the line of dialogue was meant to be a question or a statement and the repeated use of the same repeated words which repeat again and again is distracting because pretty soon I just see the repeated words standing out highlighted against the rest of the words and this bothers me do you see what I mean

These tiny interruptions are anathema to a reader and death for a writer. Interestingly, as I have noted in the past, I have never read a great script with these problems. I have read great scripts with one or two mistakes - but not consistent problems on every page. Every page. Can you imagine?

Please take the time to proofread. And at least as importantly, take the time to write properly in the first place. I know that writers might be writing quickly, on the fly (on the subway, late at night, at a café) but taking the time to write well in the first place will save you a lot of errors. And always proofread before submitting your script to anyone. My job is not to slam scripts and give them a cold and brutal PASS. My job is to find out what is working and what is not and to help the writer take the script to the next level so that when it is read by a production company, agent or manager the writer has literally put his or her best foot forward. It makes my job a lot harder and less efficient if I have six things circled on every page. Treat me the way you would treat any other producer, manager or agent.

Lately, when I read scripts, I have a subtextual agenda. Is this a writer that I might want to manage? Is this the comedy I have been looking for? Is this an opportunity for me to make a valuable connection between the writer and somebody else? But if my read is herky jerky and peppered with interruptions, if the writer was too lazy or too hurried to use punctuation properly, if the writer consistently uses the language poorly - there's no way in HELL I'd work with them beyond these notes.

So if you're thinking about submitting a script to The Script Department for notes, please do a better job of proofreading. I have had a batch of scripts lately, peppered with tiny, very fixable errors. What if I personally read your script? What if I am looking for a great comedy right now? Full disclosure: I am. My readers will simply note the error and get you the notes. I will note the errors, get you your notes and then make a tiny mental note: this writer is lazy and sloppy - down the bad egg chute you go.

Every single person who reads your script in this industry is a possible new fan of you and your work. You never know where that can lead. I can't say it enough times - never send a script to anyone before you have gone over with a fine-tooth comb. You never know. This script could open doors and create connections. This script could get you an enthusiastic fan. Don't give us any excuse to write you off as a lazy writer. Pretty please?

Now get back to work.

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Lost in the Fog

So last weekend, the Wave-inatrix did the unthinkable. I went camping with my son. Yes, there is another spawn of the W; a strapping high school senior. We packed up and went camping in West Marin County - Point Reyes to be exact. Those of you who have been there know how stunning Tomales Bay is, dotted with oyster farms, cattle ranches and estuaries peppered with blue heron. I am a big fan of oysters on the half shell and there's nothing like fresh oysters served simply, on a paper plate with a knife, a wedge of lemon and a beer, at a picnic bench overlooking the bay that Sir Frances Drake sailed his ship, the Golden Hind into in 1579. West Marin is a far cry from the tony parts of Marin that people usually think of - Larkspur, Ross, San Anselmo and Fairfax. In fact, it's another world.

A Northern Californian, born and bred, I have traveled the Northern California coast many, many times and now living in Southern California, I was reminded how majestic, windswept and dramatic the Northern California coast is. Elephant seals, abalone, light houses and great white sharks are plentiful; from the tip of Point Reyes, gray whales can be spotted migrating and the Farrallon Islands can be seen clearly. If there's no fog.

As we drove away from Olema, Inverness, Tomales Bay and the oyster farms and headed into the stark, windswept interior of Point Reyes toward the lighthouse, a thick fog descended. Creepily thick; ropey and silent, the fog gave us only occasional glimpses of wild coyotes, grazing cattle and a stag perched on a cliff. He watched us pass by calmly before melting back into the mist. It was Stephen King, MacBeth and Hitchcock fog all rolled into one. It was blowing in hard from the ocean obscuring everything in its path. Faintly, as we grew closer, we could hear the mournful sound of the foghorn, broadcasting a warning to the open ocean.

We parked the car, wrapped ourselves tightly in our hats and jackets, stood in the white-out and stared at a dismaying sign: Lighthouse: .04 miles. Walk? We had to walk in the freezing fog?? A path wound perilously atop sheer cliffs. The roar of the ocean below was the only clue it was there so profound was the freezing mist. Rocks dripped with algae, seagulls swooped into and out of sight in seconds and we passed others, returning in the other direction, hurrying back to their warm cars looking grim and cold. I have been to the light house before, years ago on a much sunnier day. My son was hesitant. Is it worth it? It's COLD! There's nothing to see! It's just an old lighthouse! Led by the sound of the foghorn, we continued on the path for what seemed like forever.

Finally, we arrived at the lighthouse, which has been perched on a rocky outcropping for over 138 years. I had been before and knew well the toll the stairs down to the lighthouse take; a straight shot down but the equivalent of climbing a 30-story building on the way up which leaves most visitors clinging to the rail, gasping for breath, pretending to be looking for whales. There may have been whales out there but there was no chance they would be seen that day. Of course, my son had to race down the stairs for the sheer glee of it but on the way back, pretended to look for whales as he gasped for breath. One father, about 1/3 of the way up the stairs, perched his young son on his shoulders and carried him the rest of the way. When he reached the top of the stairs, red cheeked and out of breath, he took his son off his shoulders. The boy promptly said - oh my LEGS! The few of us there laughed seconds before the wind whipped the sound against the rocks, muffling it and leaving only smiles.

What's all this got to do with screenwriting? Not much. Except that to say that sometimes screenwriting - or any slightly dicey endeavor - feels like walking on a winding path obscured by fog. Are we there yet? We hear the siren call of the foghorn, images appear and melt away again, the journey feels long and sometimes it's tempting to just turn around and go back to the warm car. And yet we can't - we've come all this way and the trip cannot have been wasted. Oh to see a map or a sign with a big You Are Here symbol. Then we'd know - are we getting closer? How much longer? Will it be worth it? My trip got me to thinking all of those melancholic things. Most days, I feel really great about my writing and about my company. Other days, I feel lost in the fog and ready to just turn around and head back toward certainty and safety. I crave markers and milestones - something to tell me that it's all worthwhile. I think this is something every writer can relate to. You can only get so many rejections and so many sets of notes saying a page one rewrite is needed before you begin to waver. What is this journey all about?

The only reassuring thing I can say - because guys, I go through it too - is that if the sound of that foghorn is somehow thrilling, if being on a mysterious path, while lonely and unsure is also strangely exhilarating, just keep putting one foot in front of the other and watch for those opportunities and people that suddenly appear out of the fog. Sometimes it is during your darkest hour that you turn the corner and arrive at Valhalla. Or a station on the way to Valhalla where you can find some reassurance, respite and motivation. I hope that the Rouge Wave provides a way station for you weary travelers. When I receive emails from Rouge Wavers telling me that, it is a way station for me too.

Cupcakes for everybody today. Now get back to work.

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Help Wanted Part II: The Joke List

Well Wavers, I'm sorry but I've got too much on my plate to spend much time on a fascinating, educational and/or opinionated blog post so I'm simply going to share a joke version of the UTA job list. Go ahead, have a read - the humor is a bit dry and you have to work to suss it out but check this out.

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Writers Wanted - Apply Within

Talk about zeitgeist. The tension in the air is palpable; a historic presidential election is less than three weeks away, the US economy is teetering on the brink of disaster, the war in Iraq drones on endlessly in the background and the impact of global warming has made itself so plain that even die hard fantasists have had to abandon refutations. LA is burning, hurricane season looms, the Dodgers are losing and the most optimistic of us are wondering if a potato with pipe cleaner arms and legs might make a rustic Christmas gift this year instead of the usual mall-bought offerings.

When things are in upheaval, it all seems very urgent and dire. One has two choices; to fall prey to the weapons of mass distraction - the media - and get whipped up into a foamy froth of fear or to be more circumspect, stay the course and let the drama pass. Because it is drama. All of this uncertainty is terrific media fodder and the older you are the more notches on the belt you have of when things felt apocalyptic but then resolved themselves in the end. So you get a lot less whipped up. It's a matter of where you choose to put your attention. On a personal level, you may choose to be more circumspect and not allow your attention to be dominated by fear-based media or you may choose to allow this stuff to create excitement and drama in your life. But there is a third way. Use this whipped up zeitgeist to inspire your writing.

Become an observer, predictor and mirror for what's on the collective mind.

Writers are the lightning rods for zeitgeist. Writers write about hope and change as much as they write about fear, doubt and blame. We are the collective mirror because we are mascots for humanity armed with pen and paper. We are documentarians. We are the world. Okay I couldn't resist that last one but you get my point.

Writers everywhere are distinguished from other, normal people because we feel compelled to share our hopes, dreams and fears through story telling. I often complain about the sameness of bad scripts. But what I don't often talk about (and I should) is the endless cornucopia of new thoughts and ideas I see in that vast middle-ground - okay scripts by writers who have graduated from absolute newbie with egregious errors, to the more intermediate level of screenwriter. It is at this level that many writers get stuck for a long time. But it is here that I am blown away by the incredible variety of expression.

Everybody wants to tell a story and to express themselves in a script these days. If you catch me in a cranky mood, I grumble about how everyone thinks they can write. But if you catch me in a more observant, reflective mood, I think it quite striking that so many are overflowing with so much to say. And I'm amazed by what I see going on in the zeitgeist of writers themselves.

I have seen a tremendous number of CRASH-like, moody ensembles which are in essence, bitter-sweet ruminations about the human condition but mostly anchored with a great sense of loneliness, isolation and confusion. Some writers are feeling invisible, impotent and frustrated. I see a lot of playful fantasy and romantic comedy scripts. Some writers are feeling hopeful, playful and optimistic and are writing escapist scripts. I see terribly cynical, hardboiled crime and horror scripts. Some writers are feeling jaded, helpless and hopeless.

Hollywood has a storied and dysfunctional relationship with writers and everybody knows it. It's like a dramatic tango - I love you! I hate you! I need you! I despise you! I can't live without you!

But mark my words, without the great influx of your scripts to Hollywood, the industry would grind to a halt. An entire sub-strata of the entertainment business is built on what's on your mind. Screenwriting services, software, magazines and events all lure screenwriters to Hollywood. Because without you and what's on your mind, the well would run dry. As much as it feels like trying to break into Hollywood is like talking to the hand, there's actually a great need for you and what you're writing. Future generations await hearing your stories. It's the great catch-22 of screenwriting - it's almost impossible to break in and yet vast amounts of writers are needed so that those nuggets can be found. It's panning for gold. Entire hillsides have to be exploded, sifted and searched over for those golden nuggets of stories that have not been told before in a particular way.

Writers are where it all begins. The fact is, you are needed more now than ever. And it is only through repetition, practice, education, feedback and sheer determination that you'll wind up in somebody's mesh sifter - I got one! I got a good one! Absolutely everybody in Hollywood drools at the thought of finding that great script. Everybody.

I recently spoke to an A-list writer who is looking to executive produce. He asked me to please pass on great scripts when I come upon them. Somebody is going to get very, very lucky - if I find that great script. That great script might come from me or it might come from somebody else - but I obviously have a vested interest if that person is me. People keep telling me to manage writers and I balk; I know very well the uphill battle it can be to get a project sold. Can I do that for a writer? Do I know enough people? Could I actually make a decent living panning for gold? I have decided to take on one proto-client to try it out.

Everyone would like to find that great comedy, that sweeping epic or that totally mind-blowing sci-fi script. Where are these great scripts? And what is the mechanism for vetting them? How many mediocre scripts have to be read until that one diamond in the rough is found? A diamond that I can get other people excited about? That's what all managers grapple with. And the sheer number of script submissions that aren't ready for prime time make them cranky which is why writers get that talk-to-the-hand vibe from Hollywood.

But the truth is, you got the goods, not us. Hollywood is like a steam engine, chugging along and it needs coal - scripts - shoveled into its gaping maw. A lot of coal. Every day.

So as much as this whole screenwriting thing seems like a long shot, know this: despite appearances, Hollywood has a sign hung around it that says: Writers Wanted, Apply Within.

I was sent a preview of a new documentary underway about the spec script market. I found it totally inspiring. Also, my friend Bob makes a brief appearance. Go Bob!

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The Two Most Powerful Words: What If

QUICK REMINDER: Table Read tonight, 7:30pm at the Attic Theater at 5429 W. Washington Blvd., LA, 90016. If you'd like to come, please RSVP HERE.

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So often we writers get stuck in our stories. We get married to some of the things we set up. It HAS to be a hot air balloon get-away because that's what I envisioned when I first came up with the story. This couple HAS to have known each other since high school. The story is set in Philadelphia. It just is. And then, when we get frustrated, because something isn't working, it's like bashing our heads against a concrete wall. We get stuck.

What we need to do is get out two sticks of dynamite, one labeled "what" and the other labeled "if". Ignite those two words and blow your story UP. What IF the couple knew each other since high school and then learned they were actually siblings separated at birth? No, that's weird. Okay, what IF they found out they'd been seeing the same therapist? Eh. What IF one of them was having an affair with the therapist? No, no, what if they only met on page negative ten and hadn't known each other for years? What if this story isn't set in Philadelphia but in Miami? What if it's a jet ski get-away, not a hot air balloon get-away? What if this story is set in 1952 not the present? What if this whole script is actually a western? A sci-fi story? A horror story?

Nothing is more freeing than blowing your story out and asking some "what if" questions of it. Sometimes this is very hard to do and we need help. If you know other writers, throw a "what if" brainstorming session for your story. Invite a friend over, have some beer and pretzels, open your mind and just start what-iffing.

I had a friend over last night and we discussed this particular topic. I made up a horrible logline, not unlike loglines I see with some regularity: a bunch of college buddies get drunk one night and overturn a car. Really - I see scripts in which that's pretty much the story. And it's usually based on a true story that to the person involved, was pretty hilarious at the time. There's not much story there, as you can see. But, my friend said, what IF the car that they overturned belonged to the president of the university they are attending? What if the university president's daughter is dating one of the guys? What if this is law school and these buddies were about to graduate? What if the car itself as a 1955 Silver Cloud Rolls Royce? That had a bag of money in the trunk? Is this a comedy or a thriller? It could go either direction at this point. But now we have taken a "dude, it was so funny that time me and my friends flipped some dude's car when we were in college" script and begun to explore some interesting possibilities to write a unique story. Or at least some kind of story rather than a script which is a year in the life of some dude when he went to college. I pale when I think how often I see scripts about like that. For real.

Almost any story can be what-iffed to a better place. But you have to be willing to go to the ridiculous before you find what works. What if my main character is a talking ape? Okay, ha ha, very funny. But for real, what if my main character took a DNA test and inexplicably high amounts of Neanderthal genes were found? Whoa. Maybe that works, maybe that's insane. But you have to be willing to play with the details because it is those details that can both lock us up and free us through our willingness to change them. Just because, for four drafts now, this couple knew each other since high school doesn't mean that in this draft they have not. What does that open up in this story? Maybe everything. Maybe nothing.

Be willing to blow your story out with some what if's. A different era, genre, or simply a significant detail can take what was not really working and elevate it to a whole new level. I have heard tell of writers working on comedies who suddenly discovered they were actually writing a thriller. And suddenly, everything came together and was brought to a whole new - and totally different level.

Here is a hilarious video which illustrates my point hilariously:

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How to Get an Agent or Manager

Everybody is eager to query and get repped. It will change your life, right? Money will be flowing to you in golden buckets and fame will be quick on its heels.

Not exactly. Getting representation hangs in the frustrating zen space between utter simplicity and very, very hard work. How do you know when you're ready? Only time will tell, grasshopper. Wax on, wax off.

The steps to get representation are quite simple:

1) write a great script
2) then write another one
3) stick with the same genre
4) have a dossier of several great ideas in the form of loglines
5) write a brief, powerful, polite, effective query letter
6) get hold of a Hollywood Creative Directory
7) focus on 10 to 15 agents or managers that seem like a good fit*
8) query
9) wait
10) wait more
11) follow up with an email or phone call if you haven't heard back in six weeks

Pretty simple, right? It actually is. But here is what writers often do - they jump the gun. They query when they only have ONE good script. They don't get feedback on what they think is a good script and so really have no idea where they stand. They query managers or agents all over town, indiscriminately, without doing any research. They send poorly worded queries with dull loglines and wonder what's up with the silence.

If a manager or agent likes your query, you should hear back pretty quickly. If they like the read, you'll hear back quite quickly. They'll ask you what else you have. They'll ask you about you - your writing experience, where you live, what competitions you may have placed in.

Patience, grasshopper. Get an arsenal together before you start to query. Get feedback from someone, somehow whether it is professional or a friend. Proof your material before you send it out. Spend a lot of time crafting an excellent logline.

Getting an agent or manager isn't complicated - but you need to slow down and approach the process with care. Make sure you dot every "i" and cross every "t" before you begin. I don't recommend E-blast queries - they are impersonal and scatter shot. Spending money on an HCD is the best money you'll ever spend. Take a deep breath and make sure you're actually ready to query. Keep writing and developing ideas while you wait to hear back about your queries. Do not put your life on hold. Be ready for rejection. Rejection in Hollywood usually comes in the form of dead silence. Know that obtaining representation will not change your life but it will advance you to the next level of the game.

I know writers very well and I know that most of you skimmed this and are ready to put an HCD on your credit card but really don't know if your script is that great and don't have enough material ready. But you will query anyway because you think you are special and you won't need more than one script at the ready. You think you are different and that you will get repped quickly and easily. You think this blog post is for the suckers. You can't wait to get going with all of this, you can't wait to get repped and be in the game.

When the Wave-inatrix was but a mini-W, my mother spent a lot of time sewing. And I remember vividly being so excited to just put the pretty fabric under the sewing machine needle and press that foot pedal and SEW like a maniac and turn straw into gold. No, my mother said - you have to first wash the fabric. And dry it. And iron it flat. And clear a large space on the table and get out the pattern and measure carefully. Oh - how dreary! How dull! How painstaking! And I wondered, time and again, why my completed project was lopsided and ugly. Now, when I sew, I slow down and I enjoy the entire process. I know that the quality of my project is utterly dependent on the care I put into each step along the way. Unwashed fabric will shrink and warp upon it first washing. Sloppy measurements and dull scissors will doom the fit. A chaotic sewing kit makes finding the right thread and right needle an exercise in anger management. My mother, in all her wisdom, knew exactly how to sew something properly but I would not listen. I knew how to do it! I was special! My fabric was special and my pattern was genius! Ah....youth.

You want an agent or manager? Of course you do. But s-l-o-w down. You may not be ready. Hollywood isn't going anywhere any time soon. If you don't have at least two great scripts in your arsenal, you are not ready. If you have not gotten feedback from a pro or an experienced colleague, you are not ready. There is no quick fix, there is no magic answer. You must do the work. And you are not special - the fabric of Hollywood is what it is and it yields to no man.

*Only query agents or managers (I recommend a manager if you are very new at this) that have offices in LA or New York only. Avoid those who charge ANY kind of fee.

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