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Showing posts with label Silliness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Silliness. Show all posts

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

The Robotard 8000

About a week or 10 days ago, I found the Robotard 8000 online. At first, I thought it was a joke. But the reviews of this script are by some pretty well known people. The site streaked around the intertubes with comments like - Have you SEEN this? Is this for real? ROFL what is this??

Is it a hoax? Is it a stunt? Is this by some unknown writer from Nebraska, desperate for attention? And if so - is this a genius move or is it the move of a, well, robotard?

I am told that this script is actually written by an A-lister associated with Will Ferrell. I have also been told this script was written by a collective of A-listers. I don't think anybody knows for sure but I'll tell you this - the script is hilarious. Not the most brilliant script I've ever read but what I like about it is that it is totally in keeping with the title of the script - BALLS OUT. Any script that starts with "fade the f*ck in" has my attention. The script is playful and ridiculous and offensive. And it's a quick, funny read.

Publicity stunt by a collective of A-listers or a hoax, you really should read the script for a sense of what "having fun on the page" looks like. The premise may not be the most original, but it's evident on page one and every page thereafter. The action lines are pithy, yes there are a few typos here and there, but it moves quickly and it's just so entertaining that you can't put it down. I read the first 30 pages while I was supposed to be doing something else. I just couldn't stop.

And that, Wavers, is how you want people to feel about your script. They just can't put it down.

So for a quick, fun, totally offensive read, stop by the Robotard 8000 and check out the script. The loglines on the very last page are the comedy topper of toppers.


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Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Catching Up On Your Movies

Like most of you, I have seen jillions of movies. During different phases of my life, I focused my interest on particular movies: foreign, indy, documentaries, particular directors, etc. During a huge chunk of the '80s I was an art house junkie - it's German cinema week at the Old Vic! Thus, I eschewed mainstream movies like say, TOP GUN. It was just so bourgeois! Some movies, like say AMADEUS, I skipped because they were so ubiquitous and popular - and therefore far, far beneath my snobby little self. How silly, right?

Well, now I am making things right. I have a little notebook that I carry with me everywhere I go and every time I hear about a movie I should see - whether it dates back to my snobby days, or whether it's just something that for whatever set of reasons I missed, it goes on the list. And I'm having a lot of fun working my way through it. Some of the movies on my list I am frankly horrified and embarrassed that I didn't watch. Just so embarrassed. AMADEUS? Being that I am a screenwriter and own a business that advises other screenwriters...? That's just lame. So it's on the list.

My personal list also includes movies that I am not in the least bit embarrassed that I missed - I just missed the movie and I'd like to see it. Some of those movies are: 21 GRAMS, THE ROAD TO PERDITION, MATCHSTICK MEN, GANGS OF NEW YORK, etc.

Have you ever talked to a fellow screenwriter and they mention a movie they never saw and your eyes widen in absolute horror - NO. WAY! A friend told me the other day he'd never seen CHINATOWN and that was my reaction. Are you kidding? And you write scripts? Of course, then that person said but wait - you never saw GOONIES and a lively argument ensued as to the relative merits of a cute but forgettable '80s movie that has no must-see merits when it comes to screenwriters. You can see my prejudices all over the place on that one, right?

For a movie to make my personal list, it has to have three qualities: It will enrich my personal life because it's a beloved movie, it will enrich my professional understanding of film or I'm just plain curious about it. So one example from each category: THE KID STAYS IN THE PICTURE (documentary about Robert Evans, how did I miss this? Personal enrichment.). TOP GUN (I know why I missed it, I am not embarrassed, but it is oft referred to in screenwriting circles. Professional enrichment.). GALLIPOLI (directed by Peter Weir, with Mel Gibson, supposed to be really great. Curiosity factor.).

A friend and I were discussing this very topic yesterday evening and we made a list of movies that screenwriters really should be embarrassed if they have not seen. Now, of course this list is subjective and I have not seen every single one of these movies (we'll count up the exact number) but here's the scenario: You walk into a screenwriting writers' group and you are asked if you've seen one of these movies and you haven't - and you turn beet red. Because the movies on this list are accessible and available. Because they are often discussed. Because they feature unforgettable, iconic performances or were in some way seminal, instructive or innovative. Because they are part of the history and trajectory of film (say noir or screwball).

I could blanch that someone has not seen, say, HAROLD AND MAUDE, but it doesn't make this list because it's a cult movie and because while it is amazing and excellent and one of my top movies, it isn't an embarrassing hole in your movie viewing history. I would just say wow you should go see it. Or another example: SILKWOOD. I love it, it's great, but I wouldn't look askance if you hadn't seen it.

So here is the list we came up with, that if you walked into a screenwriting group and hadn't seen this movie, you would be stared daggers at and you should indeed feel a little embarrassed:

AMADEUS*
CASABLANCA
KARATE KID*
BLUE VELVET
CHINATOWN
CITIZEN KANE
STAR WARS
ET
INDIANA JONES
CHARLIE CHAPLIN (any or all)
FATAL ATTRACTION
SUNSET BOULEVARD
PSYCHO
REAR WINDOW
MALTESE FALCON
BREAKFAST AT TIFFANYS
WALL STREET
SCARFACE
THE GODFATHER
WHEN HARRY MET SALLY
ANNIE HALL
SCHINDLER'S LIST*
THE WIZARD OF OZ
ROCKY
THE SIXTH SENSE
THE MATRIX
DIE HARD
THE PRINCESS BRIDE
HIGH NOON
TAXI DRIVER
THE BREAKFAST CLUB
TOOTSIE
RISKY BUSINESS
THE TEN COMMANDMENTS
2001: A SPACE ODYSSEY
BRINGING UP BABY
DOUBLE INDEMNITY
CHARIOTS OF FIRE*
MOONSTRUCK
FARGO
MEMENTO
IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE
THE USUAL SUSPECTS
JAWS
THE EXORCIST
GOODFELLAS*
THE SHINING
BIG
SILENCE OF THE LAMBS
ALIEN
ANIMAL HOUSE*
ON THE WATERFRONT
NETWORK
THE FRENCH CONNECTION
APOCALYPSE NOW
DELIVERANCE
PRETTY WOMAN
ARTHUR
BACK TO THE FUTURE
GONE WITH THE WIND
PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN
TREASURE OF THE SIERRA MADRE
ROSEMARY'S BABY
PATTON
THE GRADUATE
RAGING BULL
FORREST GUMP
SOME LIKE IT HOT
TOY STORY
THELMA AND LOUISE
A CLOCKWORK ORANGE*
FINDING NEMO
ONE FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO'S NEST
AMERICAN BEAUTY
THE PLAYER
ALL ABOUT EVE
TERMS OF ENDEARMENT
ADAM'S RIB
REBECCA
MILDRED PIERCE
HARVEY
FROM HERE TO ETERNITY
LAWRENCE OF ARABIA
GLADIATOR

Okay there are seven movies on this list that I have not seen and they are all on my Hall of Shame List: AMADEUS, KARATE KID, GOODFELLAS, SCHINDLER'S LIST, ANIMAL HOUSE, CHARIOTS OF FIRE, A CLOCKWORK ORANGE. And here's why I didn't see them: 1) Ubiquity/snobbyness. 2. Same. 3. Aversion to mob violence in movies 4. Tried but it upset me very much. 5. I was too young and frat life had no relevance in my life. 6. Ubiquitous soundtrack annoyed me out of it. 7) I have seen clips and it looks really upsetting. Don't worry. I'll man up.

So what would you add to this list? Remember the criteria for being on this list:

It's easily accessible: it can be found at any video store.

It is reasonable that a person younger than 40 would, could or should have seen this. This is an important criterion to remember. Should GRAND HOTEL or GILDA be on this list? Yeah, maybe. But for most younger screenwriters today who aren't enrolled in a film studies program, movies like that are reaching back into the dust bin a little bit.

It is frequently discussed in screenwriting circles. Not cinephile, snobby circles (you know who you are, person about to jot down LA DOLCE VITA). Regular circles.

It has a seminal or iconic performance (You talkin' to me?) .

The embarrassment barometer: If you haven't seen it, you often pretend you have. (Aren't you proud of me, Wavers, for being totally honest about my missing movies?)

It is not a cult movie, it is fairly mainstream (So hesitate before you list anything, Lynch-lovers. I threw BLUE VELVET on the list, because I do think it was stylistically innovative but...).

It is part of the history and trajectory of film; it fills in the holes of your film history.

It is instructive for screenwriters: It has amazing dialogue or crazy structure, it broke with convention in some way. It innovated storytelling (THE MATRIX).

Okay, ready, set...what are your hall of shame movies? How many movies on this starter list have you not seen? Paying careful attention to the list of criteria and setting your snobbi-tude aside, which movies are missing? Are you sure you aren't listing REVENGE OF THE NERDS because it lit you up when you were 12? Does it really fit the criteria?

****
Added because I've already gotten a couple of outraged - how could you forget THIS? This is a starter list. That is the point. Look over the criteria and make suggestions. What is missing that fits the criteria?

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Wednesday, March 4, 2009

The Culture of ME

Many blogs are quite personal. Which is why, for a long time, blogs did not interest me whatsoever. Even though I am a people person and a writer, I really am quite honestly not interested in the details of the lives of random bloggers. You know, the early days of blogging were very belly-button gazey so you'd have these blogs (and you still do) in which bloggers rant about everything from movies they like to how much they love their kids or hate their in-laws or when they tried a new recipe. I found (and find) those types of blogs stultifying. If a reader has no investment in who this person IS, then it's tough to be entertained by unqualified rants. However, a good blogger, one who develops a persona, is one who can attract a following that becomes invested. Or is that who becomes invested, Chaia? (Did Wavers know that my adorable-but-could-totally-kick-your-ass assistant, Chaia, edits TRW daily because of course yours truly, who espouses good grammar and language usage, is eminently fallible and doesn't always have time to make corrections?) [LOL. --Ed.]

I have thus far fairly successfully avoided making The Rouge Wave about me. Rather, I really do try to make it about YOU. I already know about me. But I gather that you guys enjoy having a reasonably entertaining place to go where you might pick up some inspiration or tips about screenwriting while avoiding work and other temporarily avoidable duties. I am a procrastinator helper and I'm happy to be your Florence Nightingale.

So every day I try to come up with something for The Rouge Wave that contains valuable information for you. Some days it's easy, other days I stare at the screen and then go look at my Facebook, check the weather, get more coffee and return to the blank screen. Some days I'm cranky about something and so I blog about that. Other days I figure, well, we haven't talked about X subject for awhile, I guess it's my duty to return to that subject. The truth is, in the two+ years I've been writing The Rouge Wave, I think we've covered pretty much every subject related to screenwriting.

If you've ever wondered, yes, I do have to approve comments so if your comment shows up - yes, I read it. You might have a question in your comment and if I have the time and the desire, I answer it. If I don't have the time, I'm sorry, I skip answering the question. I do my best. I actually would MUCH prefer if you sent questions or topic suggestions HERE.

I have received zero flaming bags of poop since I changed the "anonymous" comment posting setting. It seems when one's real name is involved, people are a little more thoughtful in their comments. Fancy that.

As you can imagine, while I love The Rouge Wave, it is only one of 10,000 other daily duties, what with running a script coverage company in the throes of tremendous growth and a screenwriting competition - which - wow, you'd be surprised how much behind the scenes work THAT is. I had to have two training sessions on how to operate the Without A Box submission system. Color me not so techno-savvy. I manage several readers, a new creative director (hi, wonderful Keith I cannot do without), business partners and new investors. And then I try to find time to write.

The blur between my personal and professional lives is profound. Some stuff comes up and I try to repurpose it to make it relevant to writers and writing. Like being at the hospital all last weekend. Or the interest and attachment my partner and I have in and to our thriller. Or the arrival of Ray the Chihuahua a few months ago. He's up to a mighty five pounds, by the way. So - you might want to watch your fingertips and valuables around him. How so much attitude can be packed into five pounds is a mystery to me. Then there's Maddy the Shih-Tzu, or as we affectionately call her, The Glacier. She doesn't move around a whole lot. Except right around midnight when she and Ray do their nightly Indy 500 around my apartment. The other night, Maddy leaned from the couch to the coffee table and one by one nicked tangerines and brought them to her lair. She was lying on a pile of like 10 tangerines when I figured this out.

But mostly, I figure Wavers really don't want to know about what I get up to on a daily basis. But maybe I am wrong. Which is why today is an experiment in how long I can hold your attention. Don't worry, I have no intentions of changing up the content of TRW. It's just for today.

I practice what I preach in terms of joyfulness and balance in my life. I take long walks most every day. And on those long walks I decompress and explore my colorful neighborhood. Which is probably 80% Orthodox Jewish so that's interesting. I live quite close to CBS Television City and am treated to bursts of audience applause several days a week which is surreal. Can you imagine? My home is an informal salon for creatives - people knock on my door and show up at all hours, seven days a week. I guess it's comfy here and I always have good food and wine. Steve Faber is my neighbor and dear friend and so we have a lot of late night chats about what he's doing. He is one of the smartest, most intellectually curious people I have ever met and we love to discuss politics, history and literature. Give Steve a good cigar and a glass of wine or Belgian beer and you've got yourself one amazing conversation. Plus Steve has taught me what courage, humor and tenacity look like.

I am thinking of getting an office so that I no longer work at home. I am looking at an office on The Lot which is a historic studio lot here in LA. Mary Pickford, Douglass Fairbanks and Charlie Chaplin had their offices there. It is a storied studio lot and currently has offices rented to everyone from Alan Ball, Sacha Baron Cohen, Fuse Entertainment, Pachew Productions*, Heroes and Villains and too many others to list. True Blood is filmed there and there is a great commissary and courtyard. I'm excited to move my offices there and will be doing so in about a month. I feel like an 18-year-old getting her first apartment - I'm already thinking about how to decorate! I have been enjoying working at cafes lately but to have an actual office - that sounds like heaven to me. Then my home can again be just my home.

*Pachew Productions is a yet-to-exist production company that my friend Mike and I are noodling around with starting. Mike's offices are currently at The Lot.

So there you have it: today's Rouge Wave. Forgive me if I have bored you, thank you very much if I have entertained you. Either way - get back to work.

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Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Sunday, February 1, 2009

100 Most Beautiful Words


Rouge Waver Steve Axelrod sent me this me the other day and since it's a nice, mellow SuperBowl Sunday I thought I'd share. Please note: I didn't bother to correct any lack of punctuation or inconsistent capitalization. What are you - some cranky-ass reader? What - are you gonna PASS on this list? Don't cause an imbroglio or be jejune.

It would warm my cockles and be quite scintillating if Wavers - especially those with Facebook - would adroitly conflate some of these words into conversation this week. It's no panacea but it would be most felicitous. Oh, halcyon days, here we come...

The 100 Most Beautiful words in the English Language

1 adroit Dexterous, agile.
2 adumbrate To very gently suggest.
3 aestivate To summer, to spend the summer.
4 ailurophile A cat-lover.
5 beatific Befitting an angel or saint.
6 beleaguer To exhaust with attacks.
7 blandiloquent Beautiful and flattering.
8 caliginous Dark and misty.
9 champagne An effervescent wine.
10 chatoyant Like a cat’s eye.
11 chiaroscuro The arrangement of dark and light elements in a picture.
12 cockle A heart-shaped bivalve or a garden flower.
13 colporteur A book peddlar.
14 conflate To blend together, to combine different things.
15 cynosure A focal point of admiration.
16 desuetude Disuse.
17 diaphanous Filmy.
18 diffuse Spread out, not focused or concentrated.
19 dulcet Sweet, sugary.
20 ebullient Bubbling with enthusiasm.
21 effervescent Bubbly.
22 efflorescence Flowering, the opening of buds or a bloom.
23 elixir A good potion.
24 emollient A softener.
25 encomium A spoken or written work in praise of someone.
26 ephemeral Short-lived.
27 epicure A person who enjoys fine living, especially food and drink.
28 epiphany A sudden revelation.
29 erstwhile At one time, for a time.
30 eschew To reject or avoid.
31 esculent Edible.
32 esoteric Understood only by a small group of specialists.
33 ethereal Gaseous, invisible but detectable.
34 etiolate White from no contact with light.
35 evanescent Vanishing quickly, lasting a very short time.
36 exuberant Enthusiastic, excited.
37 felicitous Pleasing.
38 fescue A variety of grass favored for pastures.
39 foudroyant Dazzling.
40 fragile Very, very delicate.
41 fugacioius Running, escaping.
42 gambol To skip or leap about joyfully.
43 glamour Beauty.
44 gossamer The finest piece of thread, a spider’s silk.
45 halcyon Happy, sunny, care-free.
46 hymeneal Having to do with a wedding.
47 imbricate To overlap to form a regular pattern.
48 imbroglio An altercation or complicated situation.
49 imbue To infuse, instill.
50 incipient Beginning, in an early stage.
51 ingenue A naïve young woman.
52 inglenook The place beside the fireplace.
53 inspissate To thicken.
54 inure To jade.
55 jejune Dull; childish.
56 lagniappe A gift given to a customer for their patronage.
57 lagoon A small gulf or inlet in the sea.
58 languor Listlessness, inactivity.
59 lassitude Weariness, listlessness.
60 laughter The response to something funny.
61 lilt To move musically or lively, to have a lively sound.
62 lithe Slender and flexible.
63 loquacious Talkative.
64 luxuriant Thick, lavish.
65 mellifluous Sweet-sounding.
66 missive A message or letter.
67 moiety One of two equal parts, a half.
68 mondegreen A misanalyzed phrase.
69 nebulous Foggy.
70 niveous Snowy, snow-like.
71 obsequious Fawning, subservience.
72 odalisque A concubine in a harem.
73 oeuvre A work.
74 offing That part of the sea between the horizon and the offshore.
75 onomatopoeia The creation of words by imitating sound.
76 paean A formal expression of praise.
77 palimpsest A manuscript written over one or more earlier ones.
78 panacea A complete solution for all problems.
79 panoply A complete set.
80 pastiche A mixture of art work (art or music) from various sources.
81 peccadillo A peculiarity.
82 pelagic Related to the sea or ocean.
83 penumbra A half-shadow, the edge of a shadow.
84 peregrination Wandering, travels.
85 petrichor The smell of earth after a rain.
86 plethora A great excess, overabundance.
87 porcelain A fine white clay pottery.
88 potamophilous Loving rivers.
89 propinquity An inclination or preference.
90 Pyrrhic Victorious despite heavy losses.
91 quintessential The ultimate, the essence of the essence.
92 redolent Sweet-smelling.
93 rhapsody A beautiful musical piece.
94 riparian Having to do with the bank of a river or other body of water.
95 ripple A small, circular wave emanating from a central point.
96 scintillate To sparkle with brilliant light.
97 sempiternal Forever and ever.
98 seraglio Housing for a harem.
99 serendipity Finding something while looking for something else.
100 surreptitious Sneaky.





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Wednesday, November 26, 2008

7 Movies in 4 Days

The Mini-W and I like movies. We like them a lot. We go to the video store and just about sweep our arms over shelves and take anything and everything. We figure we saw about 30 movies last summer. And those are just video rentals. We lost count of those we saw at the theaters. Some of the movies below, you're going to say HELLO oh my god, I saw that thirteen years ago! Well, yeah, but that's the point of our video store pillaging - if we haven't seen it, we see it. We are voracious movie omnivores and we bet that if you went to the video store and looked at every shelf we could probably go toe-to-toe with the greatest of cinefiles when it comes to classics. So we're playing catch up on other stuff and we love it. If we hate the movie, who cares, we order in Chinese and go to the next one.

Last weekend, we managed to see:

Artificial Intelligence AI: Wow. Fascinating premise. We were glued to the screen. Very cool and touching and then - geez - a sex robot combined with a fairy tale motif? Wha-? What a red hot mess it devolved into. Too bad. Very disappointing.

12 Monkeys: Wow! We loved it! Why is Brad Pitt so good at playing lunatics? Others said it was convoluted and confusing but we found it relatively easy to follow. We *heart* Bruce Willis and Madeline Stowe was okay too. Fun discussion about the nature of reality afterwards.

The Strangers: GREAT horror flick; scared us to pieces even though Mom had read the script about three years ago and knew what was going to happen. A knock on the door was never so terrifying. Simple, frightening, memorable. Mini-W and Mom have canceled vacation at cabin by lake.

Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay:
Oh, lord. Funny moments but not as funny as the first installment of H & K. Gross-out factor: High. Intelligence and wit: Also high. Strange combination. Best moment: when Neil Patrick Harris sees the unicorn in the background as a policeman is interrogating him. But drugs are bad. Just say no.

Journey to the Center of the Earth: Uh - well - we do like Brendan Fraser and there were some pretty cinematic moments. Too bad we didn't have 3-D glasses but we got the gist. Seems like this could have been GREAT when it was only okay. This movie is aimed at fourth graders - which is fine by us but we're too old. Mom remembers when she was working at Walden Media and they were casting for the kid. A SEA of young boys around age 12 were crowding the lobby with their moms in tow. Mini-W unimpressed by this remembrance.

Role Models: Saw this in the theater. The Mini-W thought it was funny and cute, Mom sat in silence, anticipating a big laugh but never getting it. I thought it was under-cooked, trite and obvious and am surprised at the "hilarious" reviews I have heard from my friends who have seen it. Not that funny, not that cute. Could have been so much better. Disagreement solved by going out to a delicious lunch and putting the experience behind us.

Slumdog Millionaire: Wow! Dark! Dark and wow! Epic! Colorful! Unforgettable. The Mini-W and I are big Danny Boyle fans and love how he genre hops. Not exactly a feel-good movie and yet ultimately a totally feel-good movie. We give the Bollywood ending five out of five jelly beans.

Movies Mom is looking forward to: MILK and AUSTRALIA (five words: Hugh with his shirt off). Movies the Mini-W is looking forward to seeing: SAW V (video rental from which mom will be conspicuously absent) and UNBORN.

So there's a holiday weekend coming up, Wavers. You don't have to hit the theaters if you don't want to - it's going to be crazy-crowded. But hit the video store and load up. Particularly load up on movies in the genre you love best and make sure to see any and all movies that bear any resemblance whatsoever to what you're writing right now. If you haven't seen the classics, stoop down low on the shelf, toward the bottom, and load up on those. If you want to be a screenwriter, you have no excuse if you don't see a lot of movies on an ongoing basis.

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Monday, November 10, 2008

The Angelina Jolie Effect


I saw The Changeling this weekend (don't worry, no spoilers) and Jolie really ruined it for me. Don't get me wrong, the girl can emote and also roller skate (nice little period detail). But she does not look like an ordinary person and I just couldn't detach enough from her freakish beauty to lose myself in her story. There's a lot more going on in The Changeling than Jolie (a LOT more, and it doesn't work out well) and I appreciate that Jolie, being a mother herself, took on the role with much gnashing of the teeth and pouting of those crazy lips.

I just wish I could believe, for one red hot second that a woman with that face would be a single mother working at the phone company rather than a starlet or exotic dancer. This was LA in 1928, after all, and the moving pictures were already big business. Amy Ryan, who has a small but memorable part - now that is an actress I would have bought as Christine Collins - not only can she act circles around Jolie, she looks like a regular person. Because I am a regular person I need to identify with movie characters.

I mean, don't get me wrong, most actors are extraordinary good looking people - that's the point, right? They are more handsome, glamorous and have better cheekbones than most of us out here in the unwashed masses. But in some movies, they are supposed to BE the unwashed masses, someone like us who also can't decide between love and career or who struggles with dating or paying taxes or whether to murder our abusive boss. And if all we can think when we look at them is - that is FREAKISH beauty, it distracts from the normalcy and identification that we crave. So I'm asking Angelina nicely to please retire from acting and raise her 16 children and continue her work for the global good and let other less stunning actors play us so we can focus on the story. Thanks Ang, you're a peach.

In other news I went to a meeting last evening that I can't really talk about but if I could you would be HIGHLY entertained - and I mean HIGHLY - to talk about the need for good writers and good scripts. We know by now that having a fan in the business can transform your life as a writer. And you never know who is looking for content in all genres. All I can say is - keep writing Wavers, and know that you are being sought after. Yes, sure, as a cog in the money-making wheel but that's what writing is, for better or worse and it could be YOUR script that is plucked from obscurity and pushed into development by someone who believes in you and in your story. At this mysterious meeting I pitched a particular script and all agreed the concept was great. But. How is the script itself? How is the execution? That is up to the writers. I can work with the writers (and I am and you know who you are) but it all depends on what's on the page. If this script is executed with elan and professionalism, these two writers (now you really know who you are) are going to make a sale and maybe a career. Only time will tell and I'm counting on these guys. And if they don't pull it off, I have other writers who may beat them across the finish line.

Having a great idea is one thing - great execution of that idea, great enough to get several people excited enough to get the script in front of buyers - that is the key. Suffice to say that there are people having meetings in Hollywood every day discussing the need for good scripts. And they come from you. No meeting, no fancy house, no Cuban Cigars, no fine wine and genial conversation about your script is going to go anywhere unless you deliver great page work. Crisp, clean, compelling pages that captivate. Say that three times fast. So go, writers, go! You are needed. Content does not write itself. No matter how crazy the odds may seem, no matter how much competition there is, no matter what you read in the papers about Hollywood - people are looking for content. Lives are built on good content. Theaters are filled when there's good content. Help us help you.

Now get back to work.


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Thursday, November 6, 2008

The Chronicles of Ray


I always swore that I would never write a navel-gazing blog because I honestly find blogs about what random people are doing and thinking vis a vis their lives really boring. Every day I try valiantly to have something on the Rouge Wave that pertains to screenwriting, writing or entertainment. And as I approach the two year anniversary of the Rouge Wave (December-somethingth) I think I've done a fairly good job of maintaining a focus. Even on those days when it's tough to find something to say - anything - that is of entertaining value. But today you'll have to forgive me, Wavers. Because today I am particularly tired.

Because of Ray.

I have said here on the Rouge Wave that I keep crazy hours - often up until 2am and not really functional before 9:30am. But that was before Ray. You see, Ray arrived unexpectedly yesterday evening wearing a hooded black sweatshirt and little else. And, as it turns out, he's an early riser.

Ray is a 12-week old, chocolate brown Chihuahua puppy. He's been very busy having to go potty and laying claim to all corners of the house. My Shih Tzu, the one that everybody is always talking about dognapping because she's so cute is quite confused by this new, animated toy who ferociously guards his lair, his one little stuffed toy and his dignity.

I grew up with a lot of animals; chickens, pigs, horses and rabbits. For real. I grew up in the country and my dad was very into animal husbandry. I was a proud member of the 4-H when I was in elementary school. Do they have that anymore? Our dogs were always big, tough and definitely outdoor dogs. They killed stuff and got into porcupines and skunks. Games like "fetch" and "catch-the-frisbee" were unknown to our family dogs whereas "terrify-the-chickens" was a big favorite. Our dogs never slept inside, much less on a bed. They ate food that came in 50 pound bags, served up with the rattle and clank of an old coffee can.

Not Ray. Ray is a purebred puppy that somebody bought, along with all the most expensive accessories, including, I am told, a $60 collar. But then Ray's previous owner decided he was too much work. Since he's a puppy and all. So yours truly is the beneficiary. Having to get up so early, I sleepily took Ray with me to the couch where we curled up and read a script first thing this morning. Ray is a good note-encourager, as he curls up in a tight little ball tight up against me while I turn pages. At first that sound startled him but he'll soon get used to that.

I was never the type to dress up my dog in clothes but thank god Ray came with his sweatshirt since the evenings have grown chilly and he has nary an extra ounce of fat or fur. My other dog is...zaftig, I think the word is. And furry. But not Ray - he's 2 pounds of short-haired joie de vivre in need of an extra layer. When he barks, his whole body thrusts forward with the effort. Right now he's unsure of every sound - is it a threat? An intruder? Noooo...that would be a door closing, Ray.

Ray has no problem asserting his boundaries - that's HIS tiny stuffed turtle toy, thank you very much. A guy's gotta stand up for what's his. Even to another dog who weighs 13 pounds more. Thank you, thank you, Ray'll be back every Thursday night through February and then Wednesdays at the Laugh Factory. That is, if Ray doesn't suddenly collapse into a comatose nap which he does just about once an hour, from the sheer exhaustion of being a two-pound canine with no chickens to terrify or skunks to have unfortunate run-ins with. It's a tough life.


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Monday, October 27, 2008

Russian Musical Tribute to Palin

...you know it's bad when the Russians get involved. This is hilarious.




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Friday, October 17, 2008

Help Wanted Part II: The Joke List

Well Wavers, I'm sorry but I've got too much on my plate to spend much time on a fascinating, educational and/or opinionated blog post so I'm simply going to share a joke version of the UTA job list. Go ahead, have a read - the humor is a bit dry and you have to work to suss it out but check this out.

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Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Instant Mood Medication

Put away your anti-depressants today, Wavers, I have the perfect medicine for you.
You can't watch it without grinning.

Laughing Baby Video

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Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Because I Love the Onion So

From yesterday's Onion:

Going to the Tops of Things Still Favored by Nation's Tourists


NEW YORK—According to a report released Monday by the American Tourism Society, going to the tops of things is still the preferred activity among the nation's tourists. "Although driving past things and swimming in things have both grown in popularity over the last decade, going to the tops of things still surpasses both by nearly 30 percent," said ATS president Kimberly Davis, who was careful to point out that the photographing of things was not included in the report, since the near constant occurrence of this activity makes its frequency impossible to calculate. "In 2008, tourists remained committed to standing in long lines at the bottoms of things, paying upwards of $20 to gain access to the tops of those things, and then staring at other smaller, more distant things for a few minutes before descending, often to have funny pictures of themselves drawn incorporating the things in the background." Davis added that, perhaps as a consequence of the declining economy, the purchasing of miniature representations of the things that tourists enjoy going to the tops of has dropped by 14%.

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Tuesday, May 27, 2008

When Bad Things Happen to Good Writers

Wavers, we are lucky indeed to hear from one of the writers of SHARK SWARM. The Wave-inatrix actually has been a casualty of the development process and I've seen it happen to other writers as well. And yet I still wrote a rather snarky bad review of the finished work and for that I apologize for impugning the writers in a rather cavalier manner. So the Wave-iantrix humbly offers my apologies, a cupcake and excerpts of the email I received from the writer in which he explains what went so very wrong and why. Listen and learn.

***

Hi Julie,I’m one of the writers of SHARK SWARM.

SHARK SWARM was an assignment project that I and my writing partner took over a year and a half ago. It was to be a four-hour miniseries with a fairly large budget, and it was scheduled to air on a network other than Hallmark, thus ensuring that we could include a good bit of violent content -- after all, it was a killer shark movie – who would ever expect it to end up on Hallmark, right? My partner and I worked night and day for two months, finally turning in a 240-page draft. In the end, we were very happy with it. Our script was a satirical marriage between a Peyton Place-esque small town story and 70s-style “nature run amok” movies. We wrote a series of interconnected three-dimensional characters with motivations and conflicts that were more than just surface traits (a la simple stubbornness), we poked merciless fun at corporate greed as well as blind activism, we wrote huge setpieces that would put the cost somewhere in the 30 million dollar range – pretty high for a miniseries.Then, production began. Actors and crew were hired, executives got involved, and filming commenced. We were involved in the early going during pre-production and helped to smooth out a few things, but as the film rolled, our job was done. A week into it, the budget was lowered considerably, the network deal changed, and Hallmark became the destination. An hour was hacked out of the script by the production crew. Certain big-name actors who’ve been working for years decided to change every single line of their dialogue. Other actors changed their characters entirely. Connective scenes were deleted by the producers, while scenes that we hadn’t written were added. Characters were dropped, subplots disappeared, setpieces were rewritten by producers to make them smaller, logic be damned.

The entire film was restructured in editing, meticulously researched scientific scenes (I visited marine biologists in Monterey and Santa Cruz) were dropped, reshoots were done to change character motivations and plot points, the climax was dropped in favor of a completely retooled and simplified scene that we never would have written. The final cut was a drastically different film than the one we wrote. While maybe fifty percent of our scenes made it in, they were reshaped entirely and often filled with dialogue we didn’t write. Here are a few examples. That toxic dumping thing? Not ours. Our script dealt with offshore drilling that inadvertently uncovered a mineral sheaf with electromagnetic qualities that affected local sharks and sent them into a perpetual feeding frenzy. Those pulse guns? In our draft, they were minor ultrasonic caving devices that were only used in two scenes, not supersecret military weapons. That shark cage sequence? Utterly different in our draft. And that only scratches the surface. Even worse, the final cut, which is twenty-five minutes longer and actually features a few scenes that we ended up liking, was butchered further for the Hallmark showing. So even LESS of our work made it through.

Anyone who goes through the production process knows that it’s often a wonder that ANY script survives remotely intact. Ours was one of the casualties, and the producers themselves know it. That’s the nature of the beast. At the same time, it provided a stepping stone that got us plenty of other work and allowed us a greater deal of control in the process. Since writing SHARK SWARM, we’ve written two television films (one for Spike and one for Lifetime). We’re currently working on a miniseries for one of the Big 3 networks and a feature film for one of the best actors in the business. We’ve got a career now.SHARK SWARM was our first produced credit, and we’re still quite proud of our script, despite its vast difference from the finished product.

***

And that, Wavers, is a great response. My worry, Shark Swim writers - is that aspiring writers will view this type of finished product and think that it's then okay to write scripts with gaps of logic, etc., not being aware that in actuality, the script was probably quite good and that the production may not be a representation of what is on the page.

I must say, I thought Assante's dialogue was really good - did that stay intact? He was smarmy and insincere but quite articulate and the interspersed speeches about "neighbors" and "solidarity" were fantastic. So again, cupcakes for the Shark Swim writes for taking a moment to add to the conversation and my apologies for being snarky about something that must have been a frustrating experience.

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Monday, May 26, 2008

Shark Swarm


...so a series of undisclosed events led the Wave-inatrix to plunk herself in front of Hallmark's scintillatingly titled - Shark Swarm. Wavers, there is hope for all of us.

First of all - Armand Assante. Have you seen this guy's IMDB? Has anybody made a living off of the sleazy-mean-looking-guy like Assante?

SPOILER ALERT: If you like, seriously care to know what happens (badly) in Shark Swarm, stop here and go warm your cockles over a cuppa java.

***

So Shark Swarm is about this Armand Assante who is trying to buy up this tiny town (Mendocino in reality but charmingly and cleverly named Full Moon Bay. Get it? Like Half Moon Bay?! Oh the hilarity!) and ONE guy, the Duke's of Hazzard's John Schneider (the stubborn fisherman married to a very botoxed Daryl Hannah) just won't budge. And the other townsfolk are all for selling but that's because they didn't read their contacts, as John Schneider - who really has aged nicely - points out.

So anyway. Turns out this Assante dude? Yep - he's dumping toxic waste in the bay which is killing the fish, making it a sucky living for the fisherman/townspeople, making the offer to buy their little Mendocino-Morro-Half-Moon-Bay-Town very attractive. Get it?

So nicely-aged John Schneider (flaw: stubborn) consults with his brother - a marine biologist - who used to study sharks! - anyway, they consult about the fishing situation, Assante and, apparently, some kind of great hair texturizer immune to salt spray and together they consult with F. Murray Abraham, the super duper professor of the local University - in this tiny Full Moon Bay community with one main street. So together, Schneider, his brother, the professor, Daryl Hannah and the hot EPA chick who has just come into town and makes major doe-eyes at the brother - well - they realize that because Assante has been dumping waste in the bay which killed the fish - sharks don't have their usual prey, so they are acting erratically because they are starving and swarming in huge, aggressive numbers - just off the coast! And F. Murray Abraham has this like - sonar device on his computer and he can see the shark swarms, represented by a fuzzy green cloud on his computer screen. I'm not sure how the sonar worked, either that the sharks are implanted with something to make that them visible as neon green clouds on sonar - or it's that Abraham might have turned the dial the other way seen only swarms of Marlin. It's Hallmark movie logic. Don't fight it.

And oh yeah - Daryl Hannah and Schneider have this cute, 18 year-old blonde Chelsea Clinton lookalike daughter and I'm watching this movie and I notice the girl wears the same dress during the scenes set to take place over three consecutive days. Hello - WARDROBE!?!

Oh also - yes, you may have been wondering - so the visual on the Impossible-Sonar-Device mentioned earlier is of great swarms of sharks headed RIGHT FOR the blighted Full Moon Bay. Because, as the professor said earlier - the bay has been blighted, so the sharks have been swarming within it to find food because they are confused and starved. And yet the sonar shows sharks arriving from the open ocean to head INTO the blighted area to look for food. Because they can smell the - blight? Lack of food? Also good to note: all the OTHER fish have died because of the toxic waste - but not the sharks. Just FYI. Because sharks have super anti-toxic-waste powers. C'mon you marine biology slackers, get it together.

And - I have to also mention, before the midpoint of this sleeper 3 hour movie, about 8 townsfolk have been picked off by the sharks. And yet no one is ever mentioned missing or, um, washed up missing their left leg. We see it, but the townsfolk do not react. Which causes A LOT of tension when nobody in the movie is scared, let me tell you!

The professor introduces a super-duper-pulsar-stun-gun. When you aim and fire it at sharks? You like fry their electro-sensory hunting skills. And it's a super-secret weapon the Navy (or NASA, can't remember) has developed. But this professor in Full Moon Bay (population 432 by the looks of it) has got some of these stun guns. Because. He needs them. When he lectures about the environment. You - Waver in the back - pipe down already!

But Assante's slimy henchman kidnaps Hannah! And Schneider! And Schneider's crewman, Clint! He puts them all on a boat and races to sea. And the sharks are swarming! They approach another boat -Ha - the bad guy says - ha! It's all over now! I'm going to say you tried to ram my boat with your boat, but then you're so stupid you blew a hole in your boat and drowned and nobody will suspect me and my boss Assante! We will buy your property! We will develop the town! So a struggle ensues and poor Clint gets shot and dies but not before in his dying breath, he wonders if Schneider feels lucky today. Anyway, more struggle then the bad guy suddenly has a new plan - he puts Schneider and Hannah in a shark cage and hoists them over the swarming water. Ha - he says - ha! If you get out of the cage, the sharks will eat you. If you can't get out, the sharks will bust in and eat you! I'll still get away with it! Though now I have two missing persons, a banged up shark cage and an empty, floating boat to explain. Ha- he says - ha! I've seen CSI - they'll never piece it together!

An action scene ensues in which this risky, cinéma vérité is employed:

--Bad guy girlfriend is in the hold of the boat carrying kidnapped passengers to their imminent, unsuspicious deaths. She pours champagne in anticipation of her triumph.

--Schneider and bad guy struggle up on the deck.

--Girlfriend downstairs, champagne glasses in hand, hears the struggle

--Back up on deck, the guys are wrestling for control

--Below decks, the girlfriend puts the champagne glasses on the shelf

--Above decks - the struggle continues

--Suddenly, the girlfriend shows up with a gun

I just think that for me, without seeing the girlfriend put down the glasses, I would not have believed she could have gotten on deck in this like, 26 horsepower boat fast enough. So - good detailed direction there. So. You know.

But - shark cage it is. Champagne glasses are for suckers.

Even though the CGI sharks - what looks to be a mixed school of hammerheads and great whites - are swarming straight for them, Schneider and Hannah bust out of the shark cage, use the stun gun and rise to the surface to take over the boat. But it was a pretty nail-biting sequence. No, I mean really - it was. Yup.

While the denizens of Full Moon Bay are innocently enjoying the ocean's bounty - a GIANT swarm of sharks is headed straight for them! But NO - the swarm splits up into three groups - one headed straight for a group baptism, one headed straight for the opening of the new pier with Assante officiating, and one is headed straight for the beach where Schneider's Chelsea-Clinton-lookalike daughter is swimming!

The swarm is coming, what to do!! The pastor leads the congregation into the water fully clothed. And his dialogue goes something like this: We're all here. Being baptized. As a big-ass group with no actual symbolic reason, anniversary or point that I mention. On the pier slimeball Assante is making a smarmy speech - and the sharks are swarming toward them! At Pigseye Point, the daughter and her new cute boyfriend who supports that she wants to go to college are surfing - and the sharks are racing toward them!

The sharks are swarming on three beaches. And we have three people: Schneider, his marine biologist brother and Hannah (seriously - the botox). Okay - they decide - three beaches, three of us, three coincidental events and - let's GO SAVE THE PEOPLE!! They all start for their respective cars to race to the respective beaches when - hey, Schneider shouts to Hannah - don't forget this! She turns. He holds out a stun-gun-thing - you use this. You point it at the sharks and it stuns them. Oh! Okay! Hannah says and returns to her regularly scheduled heroic race to the beach to do - what? What did she think the plan was before they handed her the super-duper stun gun?

Baaaaaaaarghgh. I think I feel a vein getting ready to burst. And just so you know, happy ending - bad guy gets eaten by a shark, all the happy couples gather on the beach, burp water and pat each other on the backs aaaaaaaaaannnnnnd sky shot.

Oh - what's this - no, we're not done! We cut to another sequence - it's the brother! And his new EPA girlfriend who turned up somewhere in the first act - they are scuba diving. What's that?! Sharks? Nooooo...they're manta rays you silly! The end.

But it wasn't all bad. Remember Clint the incidental crewman who died? In the end - give me a minute - in the end, Schneider and his daughter's new surfer-dude boyfriend are painting a new name on the back of his fishing boat. Clint's Courage. I'm sorry - I'm verklempt.

Oh Wavers. The humanity.

Disclaimer: I don't want to hear from a single Waver that movies like Shark Swarm give bad writing the green light. This is a terrible excuse and a very bad idea. If anything, movies like Shark Swarm raise the bar. Yeah - you heard me right. I used to say to people, when discussing a horrible movie (tv or big screen) that got made - hey, I wish I wrote it! That way I'd have made a sale - who cares about the quality! But you know what, Wavers - no, I do not wish I'd written that movie or any substandard movie - I'd rather write The Savages or Juno or Michael Clayton. And I'd rather wait a good long time to sell something like that than something like Shark Swarm any day of the week. No disrespect to the Shark Swarm writers but you know, I aspire to more and I think that goes for all of us.


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Friday, May 16, 2008

Getting to Know Me

Call it heat-induced narcolepsy, call it end-of-week laziness, but the Wave-inatrix just couldn't seem to motivate today. But I owe something to my Wavers today, do I not? Who else provides mildly entertaining sort-of-education while you are at work? So here is an interview Christina Hamlett (Could it be a Movie: How to Get Your Ideas From Out of Your Head and Up on the Screen) did of me for American Chronicle this last April. I think you will find it scintillating. Or at least way better than that report due today by 5pm. By that measure, almost anything is scintillating, isn't it?

***

There´s a funny scene in Shakespeare in Love in which a boatman – upon recognizing the young Bard as his passenger – eagerly tries to foist a new script on him. As anyone who has lived in Los Angeles for more than 10 minutes can attest, it´s an accurate send-up of the fact that almost every valet, waiter and clerk you encounter will just happen to have an extra copy of his or her latest project if they overhear you have any connection to Tinseltown. ("Here´s the Cobb salad you ordered, Ms. Hamlett, along with 10 side pages of my horror script about mutant lamprey eels.")

While no one can fault their unabashed enthusiasm (the writers, that is, not the eels), many of them could benefit from a session of insider knowledge on how today´s script-selling game really works. Julie Gray, founder of The Script Department, serves up her views on how to break in to this elusive market.

Let´s start out with some background on your love of movies and how you came to launch The Script Department.

I have loved movies since I was a little girl and The Wizard of Oz was on television once a year. I don´t know if it´s an odd gene or something, but I fell in love with movies like South Pacific, Oliver! and Pillow Talk. I loved the glamour, the stars, the way everything was dramatized and larger than life. (I lived in a very rural community which might have had something to do with it.) My grandmother was a stage actress in Boston and I think I inherited my love of film and theater from her. When I was in high school, my best friend and I wrote, directed, starred in, produced, edited and exhibited many fine films using our Super 8 camera and allowance money. We did everything from horror to game shows to a sci-fi fantasy with fake little Styrofoam jet fighters.

After graduating from The Writer´s Boot Camp in Santa Monica, I began working as a reader for several high-profile production companies here in town. Over time, it began to break my heart to be so brutal to the scripts. There´s just not a lot of nuance in a "pass". So often I saw scripts that had great intentions but that just didn´t deliver, particularly on the premise. I know just how hard it is to be writing feature scripts in such a tough spec market. Writers need encouragement and inspiration as much as they need the cold, hard truth about what is not working. I came to realize that how you work with a writer can either open the creative doors or shut them down. I decided to start a company that not only provided great notes but provided those notes in such a way that each writer was respected as a unique individual, no matter where they were on the curve. I wanted to really interact with writers and help them not only become better writers but to also feel empowered in the process. You don´t see a lot of that in a town that historically doesn´t have much respect for writers.

How many people work with you in analyzing new projects?

Gosh, we have grown so much I have to take a minute to answer that. There are two Script Department partners, Andrew and Margaux, and I have three other readers who work pretty much full time. Then I have a few go-to readers if I have overflow beyond that. And we also have some "boutique" services offered by such giants as Christopher Keane. I´m very careful about who I choose to work with. I have always held a very clear vision of our objectives and every story analyst who works with me holds the same vision of integrity, kindness, honesty and encouragement because we are all writers and we´ve weathered the slings and arrows.

What is the breakdown of charges and what can clients expect to get for their money?

We offer everything from Story Notes, which is $400 and you get an hour phone consultation after you´ve received 5 pages of notes, down to logline and query letter evaluation which is $75 and everything in-between. We try to tailor our services to the unique needs of writers. Probably our most popular service is the 3-reader package where three of us read your script and get you 1.5 pages of notes. So the writer gets three opinions and three takes. That one flies off the virtual shelf!

We launched a screenwriting competition this year, called The Silver Screenwriting Competition. We´re doing this competition in the same spirit as The Script Department, holding that vision of writers really benefiting from their relationship with us. The Grand Prize is pretty generous and my favorite part of it - beyond the $2500 in cash, beyond the free trip to LA, beyond the day of meetings with 3 managers - is cocktails with Blake Snyder at the Chateau Marmont. How incredible is that? I´m tagging along, for sure!

The Rouge Wave is a hilarious component of your website! Tell us how this flirtation with silliness and mirth came about.

Oh, thank you. The Rouge Wave is definitely a labor of love. I don´t flirt with silliness, I am silliness. My business partners really have so much patience! What can I say, I´m a Scotch/Irish redhead and we like to laugh.

And again, returning to something that I said earlier and the motto that Mary Poppins lived by, a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down. When we can laugh and be silly, we open ourselves up to learning. So the Rouge Wave is a very silly and yet very informative place. I run little short scene competitions a few times a year and gosh, let me tell you, I´ve gotten some good stuff!

What do you feel is the most unique about what The Script Department has to offer its clients?

Our attitude and intention. We take our time with each client and we pour ourselves into it, heart and soul. You wouldn´t believe the gifts and cards we get each month. It makes me choke up sometimes; wine, candy, chocolate – I even got a boomerang from an Australian client! I have clients offer me their homes for vacation – I mean, who does that? I like to think that we receive what we put out there to our clients. Working with The Script Department is like working with friends who get you feeling comfortable and relaxed and then tell you the truth about your work so that you can raise your potential as a writer.

On average, how many projects do you receive per month and, of these, how many sparkle with potential?


We get between 20 and 50 scripts per month. Sometimes more. Of that number, I´d honestly say maybe every couple of months we see a script that really blows us away and those we do submit to various managers. In terms of potential, we probably see perhaps 3 or 5 a month that, while in need of work, do have potential because of a unique premise and/or because the writer really has a great "voice".

What are the three biggest mistakes you see in the submissions you review?

Soft premise – meaning, there´s simply not enough story to tell, and poor character work. Characters who are two rather than three-dimensional. Writing great characters takes time and experience, there´s no two ways about it. Oh, and typos – people forget to proofread and those simple mistakes can really encumber a script.

Which genre would you like to see more of/less of?

It´s not really a genre, but scripts that are essentially autobiographies with the names changed. We see, very often, young writers who are writing their first or second scripts and they forget to test the premise to make sure that the time they went to Florida and their cousin Bobby got lost in the petting zoo is as entertaining to others as it was to them. It´s not. I would like to see less fantasy/epics because, honestly, with the box office domination of Harry Potter, for a new writer to break in with an expensive spec like that is next to impossible. Writers should write what they love and what fascinates and motivates them but also keep an eye on the market. Judd Apatow has put a new spin on comedy in the past few years so don´t write another Judd Apatow comedy; try to foresee the next wave of comedy in terms of zeitgeist.

The $64,000 question: why is Hollywood turning out so many bad movies (including remakes and sequels)?

Because box office is slipping and television is taking a big bite. Studios are very risk-averse. It´s getting harder and harder to get audiences into the movie theaters and executives are making decisions based on the lowest common denominator. Teen boys are a very lucrative part of the box office and shock/horror and violent movies appeal to them very much. But the slow-grade success of The Bucket List is an example of a movie for a different age range that, while it didn´t do box office gold on its opening or any other weekend, has proven to have legs over time. I think audiences like intelligent, provocative movies and that sooner or later, the decision-makers in Hollywood are going to have to acknowledge our aging population and widen the net.

What´s your best advice to someone who wants to write his/her first screenplay?

Take a class. There are online classes available through UCLA that are quite valuable and many other programs, from weekend workshops at Gotham to 12-week programs at The Writer´s Boot Camp. You learn by doing – buying 12 books on screenwriting is very overwhelming. I can´t recommend taking a class enough – and then another class. And another. Educate yourself and get the peer and academic support you need so that you don´t waste four years writing pointless scripts and feeling totally defeated. Some are real self-learners, sure, but in any case, all aspiring screenwriters should also read as many produced scripts as possible. If there is one faster track to learning, it is reading produced scripts. There you can see, right in front of you, what is working. Beyond that, there are message boards like Done Deal and of course Absolute Write that offer a lot of inspiration and instruction and I like to think The Rouge Wave is a good resource, too.

The most recent writers strike was not the first – nor will it be the last – experienced by the film industry. Do you envision that more screenwriters will start following similar trends provoked by the publishing world (i.e., the emergence/escalation of ebooks/downloads, self-publishing, small presses) and embrace alternative venues that are at less risk to disruptions of income stream, intellectual property rights, and residuals?

Yes. I think a whole new world is dawning in entertainment and that we have only just begun to see its effects. This is the You Tube generation and the success of websites like "Funny or Die" prove that there is a plethora of new venues out there for entertainment and writers. I think it´s an extraordinarily exciting time for writers because a system which was exclusive and entrenched is beginning to crack around the edges.

What are your three favorite movies of all time and why?

Without question, Singin´ In The Rain because I love the music, I´m a huge Gene Kelly fan and I just love the optimism of those MGM musicals in the 1950´s. I think I´ve seen Singin´ over a hundred times!

Another all time favorite is Harold and Maude. The premise is perfect, the character arcs beautifully wrought, the theme is life-affirming and, of course, it has a great soundtrack. The first time I saw it, I was a teenager and I really didn´t know what to make of it but over time, I discovered a new layer with every viewing. Great writing and truly heartfelt material.

More recently, I loved Away From Her and 3:10 to Yuma. Loving the latter surprised me because I don´t think of myself as a fan of westerns, but the writing and performances were spectacular. That scene where Christian Bale whispers fervently to his wife why he has got to take this on brought tears to my eyes. My god, every word was just golden.

Oh and I can´t leave out Ordinary People. That has to be up there in my all time favorites. It doesn´t matter how many times I see it. I love that movie top-to-bottom; performances, writing, direction – everything.

If a movie were made of your life, who would you most like to portray you?

Carrie Fisher.

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Thursday, May 8, 2008

The Run for the Roses


This week, the Wave-inatrix guest lectured at a UCLA online novel-writing class! How fun! And I did it in my jammies! The students asked fantastic questions about screenwriting and I think we all learned a little something about each other and the art of telling a story. Turns out that we have more in common than one would have thought possible.

If any Wavers have ever taken an online writing course at UCLA, I highly recommend it. It's a great experience and in this instance, I was beyond honored that the teacher, novelist Caroline Leavitt, recently published by Algonquin, thought this crazy redhead would have something to say to her class. Thank you again, Caroline - what a pleasure. I hope your students recover soon and that nobody sues me. I don't know what made me say that about Norman Mailer but I totally take it back.

As I post this, there are only 14 hours left in the Short Scene voting here on The Rouge Wave. That means voting ends early tomorrow morning. If you haven't taken time to vote, please do. Though Andy at Bat seems to be the clear winner - you never know. Let's nobody break any ankles getting over the finish line. Ohhh that made me so sad. Seabiscuit my ass. Somebody needs to bust that whole industry wide open. Oops, I did it again. Digressed.


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Thursday, April 17, 2008

Original Ideas

...so I'm on the phone with Go Daddy this morning asking why in the &%$ The Silver Screenwritingwebsite was experiencing grievous technical problems earlier today (problem solved) when the customer service guy said - so, you work with screenplays, huh? Can I ask you a question? Why has there not been one original idea to come out of Hollywood in fifteen years?

Rather than say here what I said to him in reply - the Wave-inatrix was curious - what do you Wavers think about that statement? Is it true? If there's any truth to it (and there certainly is, to a degree) then why? Why so many remakes and sequels? What would you have said to this guy?

If there's a delay before your comments are posted it's because the W is actually - wait for it - taking a mental health day out in the desert. But fear not, we shall discuss this when and if you comment. Commenters always get mental cupcakes, dontcha know.

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Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Hands Across the Sea

Novelist, UCLA instructor and bon vivant Caroline Leavitt gave an unexpected shout-out to the Rouge Wave yesterday and I'd like to give her a shout-out back. C'mon Wavers, a big red wave to Ms. Leavitt! For those of your working on or considering working on a novel, Caroline's blog is a great resource.

What does the Wave-inatrix say about writing in many different formats? She says DO IT. Don't let screenwriting atrophy your writing brain. Work it every day, Wavers - poetry, essays, fiction, reviews - be holistic about your writing.

If there are any Rouge Wavers who have a 1st person essay about their experiences screenwriting (500 words, max) that they'd like to share please submit HEREand you might just be on the Rouge Wave.

And don't forget to check out Caroline's blog and show her some love - Rouge Wave style.

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Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Magnum Opus Theater in Los Angeles

I just couldn't resist posting this for those local Wavers who might have the inclination to attend this performance. The Wave-inatrix will definitely be there this Friday evening when the show begins at 11pm. Laughter is the best medicine.

Sacred Fools presents Magnum Opus Theatre — the return of a long-running show with an ardent cult following. The premise is simple: a cast of talented performers produces staged versions of terrible film scripts sent to Hollywood studios by aspiring screenwriters, with hilarious results.


For more information CLICK HERE


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Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Grin of the Day

Wavers, once in awhile I come across something that just makes me grin from ear to ear and know that life is most certainly good - and unpredictable. Check out this link from Improv Everywhere


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