Top Three Finalists

Good Monday, Wavers! The Expo has wrapped up for another year, Los Angeles is slouching toward Thanksgiving with smoke-filled air and today we have the top three short scenes in the Thanksgiving, Chihuahua, Election competition.

Voting Guidelines: As always, NO ballot-stuffing. Finalists, please refrain from asking your parents, co-workers and groupies to vote for you just because you're so wonderful. We haven't had a serious ballot stuffing problem in some months but I think we all remember that with distaste. Vote for the short scene that you most enjoyed - simple as that.

Animal House
by Jeff Undsman

INT. ANIMAL HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES - DAY
A whole host of animals sit in a huge semi-circle. On the platform, a massive turkey paces back and forth. This is SENATOR RED NECK.

Behind the podium stands SPEAKER CHIHUAHUA. He strikes the podium with a wooden hammer.

SPEAKER CHIHUAHUA
Ladies and gentlemen, it's Thanksgiving day and it’s getting late. Everyone wants to get home.

REPRESENTATIVES
(all together)
Gobble-gobble-gobble. Woof-woof-woof. Meow-meow-meow.

SENATOR RED NECK
I have to be at the table today, no matter what.

SPEAKER CHIHUAHUA
The election has been postponed way too long. We must finalize the candidate. Senator Red Neck has been the most popular candidate but as you all know...

The room fills with jeers, cheers, and an assortment of ANIMAL SOUNDS.

SPEAKER CHIHUAHUA
It is against this country's laws for a president to be foreign born.

DISTANT VOICE
You can't prove anything!

SPEAKER CHIHUAHUA
Senator Red Neck is ineligible to be elected and I have proof. He is not the typical turkey you were all led to believe in.

Silence falls upon the room. Speaker Chihuahua scans the room. All eyes are upon him.

SPEAKER CHIHUAHUA
It pains even me to break the news to you all, but Senator Red Neck was not born in the United States of Animals. He was born in...

Senator Red Neck waves his wings as if trying to stop Speaker Chihuahua from continuing.

SPEAKER CHIHUAHUA
(screaming)
Turkey!

***

Birds of a Feather
by Cathy Krasnianski

FADE IN:

INT. BARN – DAY
The turkeys are assembled in the center of the room.

CROOKED BEAK
So, you all know Thanksgiving’s tomorrow, right?

The birds exchange nervous looks.

SCRAWNY NECK
He wouldn’t pick me, would he? I’m too young to die!

He lets out a squawk.

BRUISER
Hey, none of us wants to end up like poor Henrietta.

They cringe, remembering.

BRUISER (CONT’D)
...and this year, if we’re smart, we won’t. C’mere.

The birds huddle.

PELE, the farm’s overly cheerful Chihuahua bursts in.

PELE
Hi guys! What’s shakin’, ’sides me?

The birds regard him.

BRUISER
We were just talking ‘bout you, kid. Congratulations, you won the election for mascot. Scrawny will help you into your costume.

PELE
This is so cool! I didn’t even know I was nominated.

Scrawny leads Pele away. Just then, FARMER BOB Enters.

FARMER BOB
So, who’s it to be this year, boys?

The birds part, revealing Pele covered in feathers.

ALL THE BIRDS
Him!

FADE OUT

***

Chewie is Dead
by Richard Sheehy

EXT. TRAIN STATION - DAY

ROBBIE COLE (18) stands alone. An old, beat up Chevy pulls
up. In the front seat, his parents, RITA and LEO COLE (50s),
wave spastically. A Chihuahua yips away in Rita's lap.

Robbie shuffles over - dead man walking - climbs in.

INT. THE COLE'S CAR

RITA
Oh, my god! You lost weight. Leo,
he's a skeleton. Have you been
eating? You need my Thanksgiving
dinner to fatten you up again.

LEO
Rita, please. Give the kid a
break. He just got off a train.
You look bigger. Been workin' out?

Robbie just stares ahead, dumbfounded.

RITA
So... how'd the election go?
Should we be calling you Mr.
Student Body President?

ROBBIE
I got eleven votes.

Leo and Rita exchange a hopeful look.

ROBBIE
Out of a thousand.

They grimace. Robbie points to the dog. It still yips away.

ROBBIE
Ummm, what the hell is that?

RITA
Surprise! I know how hard it was
on you when the police shot Chewie.

ROBBIE
You got a Chihuahua to replace my
Rottweiler?

LEO
Good to have you home, son.

ROBBIE
I hate my life.

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